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17-05-2022, 23:43
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#31
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Hollywood, Fl.
Boat: FP Athena 38' Poerava
Posts: 4,028
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
I've met a lot of CF members and a lot of lurkers. I hear a lot of the same comments from them. You'd be surprised how many people read but will not comment on this forum, or those that have posted once or twice just to get harangued by the "few" over some simple slight. Pretty much every board has it's "Dirty Dozen" I put them in the same category as DMV workers and Condo board members. Given a little perceived power and self-import and watch out. I have never put anyone on ignore. I wouldn't even know how to do it. My ignore button between my ears works a whole lot faster.
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18-05-2022, 01:58
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#32
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Boat: Island Packet 40
Posts: 6,501
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Marshmallows.
__________________
Satiriker ist verboten, la conformité est obligatoire
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18-05-2022, 04:14
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#33
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Good question
Boat: Rafiki 37
Posts: 14,643
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celestialsailor
Hmmm, I wonder why I have 10 little lemons where there should be green squares?
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Oh, we know that isn't true. You're "just really helpful" ... at least that's what your green dots tell me.
NOTE: On the web-based CF site, if you mouse-over (hover) someone's green dots, a description pops up.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Celestialsailor
All kidding aside, I find it interesting when one of the long time "always right" members add their comments to a long thread and nobody responds to him...or should I say see's him.
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Yes... speaks volumes. Hey wait, this often happens to me  .
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18-05-2022, 04:37
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#34
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Senior Cruiser

Join Date: Mar 2003
Location: Thunder Bay, Ontario - 48-29N x 89-20W
Boat: (Cruiser Living On Dirt)
Posts: 51,803
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
What I [sometimes] write, seems to anger some people, and cause them to dislike me, and, perhaps, put me on 'ignore'.
Some may even respond with disgust, and hatred.
Follows an interesting article, about understanding how people respond to transgressions, in the social and political spheres, from their value and belief systems.
Unlike anger, hate seems to be aimed, not at the targets’ behaviours, per se, but at the targets themselves.
“What makes hate a unique emotion – and why that matters” ~ by Cristhian A Martínez
Discusses the differences between negative emotions [toward an individual, or a group] such as dislike, anger, contempt and disgust - and hate.
Hate seems to be related to fundamental and non-negotiable disagreements, in core moral beliefs [worldview] .This could indicate that at least part of what people find particularly aversive, about their hate targets, is the perception that those individuals or groups endorse the opposite of what they believe is fair, noble and right, or their idea of what is a good life, or a good society.
Having a clear idea of what hate means, and what its dynamics are, is essential for identifying and responding to it. For instance, political ideologies that capitalise on identity threats, or on the supposedly evil character of certain groups, might be instilling much more than anger among followers – sowing the seeds for long-term aggression, and fostering social division.
Article ➥ https://psyche.co/ideas/what-makes-h...ocket_discover
“Hate: Toward understanding its distinctive features across interpersonal and intergroup targets.” ~ Cristhian A Martínez, with Jan-Willem van Prooijen, & Paul Van Lange
➥ https://doi.apa.org/doiLanding?doi=10.1037%2Femo0001056
__________________
Gord May
"If you didn't have the time or money to do it right in the first place, when will you get the time/$ to fix it?"
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18-05-2022, 07:08
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#35
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running down a dream
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Florida
Boat: cape dory 30 MKII
Posts: 3,235
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
I guess I don't get it. Life is not always pleasant and harmless. Why should the cruisers forum always be forced to play softball? After all it is a hard ball world isn't it? Yeh I know .. rules are rules
__________________
some of the best times of my life were spent on a boat. it just took a long time to realize it.
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18-05-2022, 07:15
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#36
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Moderator Emeritus

Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Carrabelle, Florida
Boat: Fiberglas shattering 44' steel trawler
Posts: 6,082
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
And, if you want the moderators to take a look, just tap that red and white triangle at the lower left corner of the post.
__________________
Never let anything mechanical know that you are in a hurry.
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18-05-2022, 07:58
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#37
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Lake Ont
Posts: 8,582
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Quote:
Originally Posted by gonesail
I guess I don't get it. Life is not always pleasant and harmless. Why should the cruisers forum always be forced to play softball? After all it is a hard ball world isn't it? Yeh I know .. rules are rules 
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Well, here's one - many (most?) of us enjoy boating and the boating world because it's a welcome relief or antidote from the stresses and aggravation of "life". There are zillions of other sites where people can pontificate, debate and argue about all the current non-boating hot-button topics; why do they need a home on CF as well?
Those contentious topics are guaranteed to divide and to rile people up, whereas most of us have a healthy and constructive attitude about boating stuff. CF is a better place when it sticks to boating-related topics, which is what we all hopefully have in common.
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18-05-2022, 08:03
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#38
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Registered User
Join Date: Dec 2008
Posts: 322
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mike OReilly
Yes, the Ignore List is your friend here on CF. That said, I have no one on my list. I just know who to ignore (mostly  ).
I do wish there was some sort of way to know who was on people's ignore list. I actually think it would be a useful reputational measure, especially for new users who come into this space and sometimes get chased away by "ignorable" members.
You can see how many "thanks" a member has received by looking at their rating in their public profile. It's the row of little green dots or squares in the top right corner; the more, the better. It's too bad the software doesn't also provide a score or measure of how many people have a user on "ignore."
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Scoring members and keeping track of their "reputations" sounds a little Orwellian to me.
I operate on the assumption that new members to a forum are just as smart as I am and are perfectly capable of sorting out the various personalities they encounter based on their postings.
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18-05-2022, 08:15
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#39
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2019
Posts: 651
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Just wanted to respond to some suggestions earlier in the thread about letting people know they are ignored and publishing an ignored count.
Please be careful about that - I would like to ignore people without them knowing. I also don't want them ignoring me back in a tit-for-tat manner, because then I'll be labelled with a high ignore count.
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18-05-2022, 08:38
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#40
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Moderator

Join Date: May 2012
Location: At sea somewhere in the Caribbean
Boat: Jeanneau Sun Fast 40.3
Posts: 6,582
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mike OReilly
Yup, still here, and still spouting my libertarian-socialist perspectives  . Although, I do admit, I've been spending a bit less time at CF than in the past.
I'll be back to my boat in a couple of weeks -- first time I'll lay eyes on her in nearly 2 1/2 years. Keep reading the blog to find out what happens next  .
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Mike - we're at sea again for the first time in almost 2 years - My God what a great feeling.
You will love being back on your boat. We'd almost forgotten what this is like.
Now on our way - bound for Alaska - if spring ever gets to British Columbia and Alaska we will indeed be overjoyed (raining like mad most days) -
Think perhaps we should not have picked a La Ninã year to go in?
__________________
https://www.amazon.co.uk/s?k=carsten...ref=nb_sb_noss
Our books have gotten 5 star reviews on Amazon. Several readers have written "I never thought I would go on a circumnavigation, but when I read these books, I was right there in the cockpit with Vinni and Carsten"
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18-05-2022, 08:52
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#41
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Western Australia
Boat: Southcoast 36
Posts: 177
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Yawn
Its an internet forum folks - it's really not that important. Not to me anyway. YMMV
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18-05-2022, 09:37
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#42
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Registered User
Join Date: Mar 2022
Location: Ontario Canada
Boat: Jeanneau SO 389
Posts: 1,969
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Stop yur whining about BC climate
Here in frozen Ontario we hit 29c. Woohoo finally got out. Safe trip along that lovely coast.
This forum is pretty mellow. Like several of you mentioned most folks boat to relax.
I’ve been in 8 marina / yacht clubs in near 50 years. Before that we just stole Dads boat off the dock. I’ve never been in a club without a clique or two. So the judgemental rumour monger assuming folks exist just a boat length from you. They are more bold on the Internet ,use different language even Hunt from site to site to find a disagreement.
At clubs the cliques love establishing special rules or inside knowledge. The revenge is half of them are in big debt and can’t afford to boat.
At one club there was at the clique would line up for food and wine and go back to their lawn chairs and glare at people enjoying club events. Over the years these cliques thin out. One clique member gave me a lecture about noise after 10:01. We were talking laughing and had mild back ground tunes. 2 years later he finds out from members I’m a scuba nut. He asks me to fetch a gold bracelet he dropped in his slip. I told him the silt ate it long gone sorry. He was also pretty gruff with his wife, so divorce boat sold nuisance gone. Scuba vacuum ! Found a male diamond ring also.
Eventually someone delivers their karma.
Years later we meet the wife in Georgian Bay. New guy new boat happy girl.
We knew a young couple with three kids. Somehow their kids adopted us as grandparents. They were a slip row over and one spring they never returned. 10 years later 3 teenagers we meet them out on the bay. Same Sea Ray 330. They left because of the clique I’ve been babbling about told them children were not welcome. I quit the club that day. Phoned them told them I’m moving and got a new slip up the lake.
Some threads you just have to leave.
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18-05-2022, 10:06
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#43
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Good question
Boat: Rafiki 37
Posts: 14,643
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Quote:
Originally Posted by siamese
Scoring members and keeping track of their "reputations" sounds a little Orwellian to me.
I operate on the assumption that new members to a forum are just as smart as I am and are perfectly capable of sorting out the various personalities they encounter based on their postings.
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Talk to CF then ... they already track this stuff.
Of course, new members are just as smart ... what an odd thing to suggest otherwise. But it takes time to figure out who is worth listening to, and who is worth ignoring -- just as with all communities.
People can look at a member's rating based on how many times they've been thanked. This is one small way to get a sense about people here. Another way (it seems to me) would be to know how many people have a member on their ignore list.
But mostly it comes down to listening and learning.
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18-05-2022, 10:13
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#44
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Registered User
Join Date: Feb 2022
Posts: 195
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Rating people by how many ignores just makes it easier for those who upon reading something, they instantly ask "what is the source", so they can ignore or disparage, if they do not like that source.
Openmindedness is a superior attitude.
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18-05-2022, 10:21
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#45
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Registered User
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Good question
Boat: Rafiki 37
Posts: 14,643
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Re: Keeping CF pleasant
Quote:
Originally Posted by Idaho
Rating people by how many ignores just makes it easier for those who upon reading something, they instantly ask "what is the source", so they can ignore or disparage, if they do not like that source.
Openmindedness is a superior attitude.
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Maybe I'm not following your post, but openmindedness has nothing to do with validating information. The source always matters.
This is a big part of the problem we see all over social media; too many people just blindly accept whatever is written in their feeds. The fact is, not every opinion is equal. The source does matter.
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