Flaming Potential Friends

[Canibul]

I think I am finally learning that arguing online is pretty pointless. The simple truths are self evident and self supporting. People either don't know what they are talking about, or they do. If you lost an argument to someone on the internet, it's because YOU didn't know what you were talking about in the first place.

And if you DO know what you're talking about, the idiots who argue with you obviously don't, and others can quickly see that or look it up for themselves.

Educating someone who is mistaken is entirely different than arguing with an idiot.

Also, in my own case, I find that if I refuse to even address or respond to anything of a political or religious nature, it sure seems to thin out the arguments.

[s/v Beth]

Flame me.
Shame me,
I will remain,
Raising Cain.

Why?
Cause I distain
being lame
or tame.

Now I don't want to hurt your feelings
And I'm sure you care about mine,
but if we engage in a vigorous discussion
well its only a matter of time

So I through my hat into the ring,
and thicken up my skin,
And if to a topic you must cling,
May the best wisest knowledge win!

[Ocean Girl]

Good one newt.

[NorthPacific]

Sorry all this bravado and testosterone on show! What a load of cobblers. I know hundreds of people, scores of boaters, idiots and geniuses alike and only on forums where people hide behind "nicks" is it so common for some individuals to take pride in being so bloody rude.

Be honest, being the tough guy on a forum is safe. Being rude and or arrogant in real life means being lonely and or loosing teeth. Life is too short, what is the point?

Look I am a nice guy, great sense of humour, takes a lot to anger me, water of a ducks back, turn the other buttock, but unless you are 50lbs of muscle heavier than me 3 foot taller I doubt that very few, in a face to face meeting would converse with me in some of the tones that I often see on here.

This forum provides some great advice and knowledge, from many sources. I have benefitted greatly but by god there are a few nobs. I have to look at it as just like a crowded anchorage. When you have a problem a majority will lend a hand or give a beer. Then there are a few who….. well we all know who and what they are.

Costs nothing to be civil even on a forum!

[NorthPacific]

Just saw my post count so this makes it 667

[captain58sailin]

One of the issues of posting on a forum, is you can't hear tone of voice or see a facial expression, so it is hard to judge intent, one can sometimes take offense where none was intended. Of course getting offended here would be silly, though I have on ocaision and had to remember, none of these people know me, who I am or what I am about, and certainly have not walked a mile in my shoes; why on earth would I give them the power to anger me.

[boatman61]

Originally Posted by NorthPacific

Sorry all this bravado and testosterone on show! What a load of cobblers. I know hundreds of people, scores of boaters, idiots and geniuses alike and only on forums where people hide behind "nicks" is it so common for some individuals to take pride in being so bloody rude.

Be honest, being the tough guy on a forum is safe. Being rude and or arrogant in real life means being lonely and or loosing teeth. Life is too short, what is the point?

Look I am a nice guy, great sense of humour, takes a lot to anger me, water of a ducks back, turn the other buttock, but unless you are 50lbs of muscle heavier than me 3 foot taller I doubt that very few, in a face to face meeting would converse with me in some of the tones that I often see on here.

This forum provides some great advice and knowledge, from many sources. I have benefitted greatly but by god there are a few nobs. I have to look at it as just like a crowded anchorage. When you have a problem a majority will lend a hand or give a beer. Then there are a few who….. well we all know who and what they are.

Costs nothing to be civil even on a forum!

50lbs lighter and run faster.....

[goboatingnow]

have we been flaming Boatie, I always thought he's fair game anyway, cause I'm convinced with that number of posts , he's actually a middle aged wife living in Montana!!!!

dave

[MarkJ]

The difference between forums and a real life gathering of cruisers is that in real life at a bar no one hangs around sprouting crap about anchors, or anchoring, or how t hove to, or who uses paper charts.

We talk about women, sex, and wheres the cheapest fuel......


And football.


And wheres the next cheapest Happy Hour.


And more about sex...

[goboatingnow]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

The difference between forums and a real life gathering of cruisers is that in real life at a bar no one hangs around sprouting crap about anchors, or anchoring, or how t hove to, or who uses paper charts.

We talk about women, sex, and wheres the cheapest fuel......


And football.


And wheres the next cheapest Happy Hour.


And more about sex...

I need to change sailing friends, none of mine talk about sex or women, nowadays its about the latest run in with medicine

dave

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by NorthPacific

Sorry all this bravado and testosterone on show! What a load of cobblers. I know hundreds of people, scores of boaters, idiots and geniuses alike and only on forums where people hide behind "nicks" is it so common for some individuals to take pride in being so bloody rude.

...

Like NorthPacific and others have said, I am sometimes dismayed at the level of discourse on this and the other sailing forum I participate in. Thankfully most of the discussion remains civil, but it seem to go off the rails when people feel the need to justify their own personal choices (Ex: mono vs multi, anchor choice, guns, fridge, insurance, etc.). As MarkJ says, no one in real life gets into snit-fits over these things, so what is it about online forums?

I do think it has something to do with the anonymity most people hide behind. If people were forced to use their real names instead of nicknames, I bet (based on research I've read) there would be a lot less immature behaviour.

Has CF ever considered having everyone use their real name, instead of a pseudonym?

[Celestialsailor]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

The difference between forums and a real life gathering of cruisers is that in real life at a bar no one hangs around sprouting crap about anchors, or anchoring, or how t hove to, or who uses paper charts.

We talk about women, sex, and wheres the cheapest fuel......


And football.


And wheres the next cheapest Happy Hour.


And more about sex...

.....and all in that order too

[Jim Cate]

Originally Posted by Mike OReilly

Like NorthPacific and others have said, I am sometimes dismayed at the level of discourse on this and the other sailing forum I participate in. Thankfully most of the discussion remains civil, but it seem to go off the rails when people feel the need to justify their own personal choices (Ex: mono vs multi, anchor choice, guns, fridge, insurance, etc.). As MarkJ says, no one in real life gets into snit-fits over these things, so what is it about online forums?

I do think it has something to do with the anonymity most people hide behind. If people were forced to use their real names instead of nicknames, I bet (based on research I've read) there would be a lot less immature behaviour.

Has CF ever considered having everyone use their real name, instead of a pseudonym?

Mike, some of us, possibly naive, DO use our real names! And apparently (from some responses I've earned over time) I am viewed as snarky! I try to not attack persons, for there is no point in that, but occasionally my BS alarm goes off on a sensitive subject and I react... hopefully with logic, or even real data!

But really, CF seems a pretty friendly place, especially when you compare it to Sailing Anarchy!

Cheers,

Jim

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by Jim Cate

Mike, some of us, possibly naive, DO use our real names! And apparently (from some responses I've earned over time) I am viewed as snarky! I try to not attack persons, for there is no point in that, but occasionally my BS alarm goes off on a sensitive subject and I react... hopefully with logic, or even real data!

But really, CF seems a pretty friendly place, especially when you compare it to Sailing Anarchy!

Yes Jim, you and Ann and a few others I could name have always been civil and respectful in your comments (at least in my direct experience). Even when you're "snarky" I've never found your posts to be outright rude or intentionally disrespectful. It is possible to be strong and clear, even when voicing a personal opinion, but one need not denigrate or attack those who disagree.

I too am naive enough to use my real name. It comes from being a journalist I suppose. I feel it is important to take responsibility for the things you say. I also get snarky at times. I've had to apologize to too many people (you included I believe), but I do try and remember there are real people at the receiving end of my pen (or keyboard).

I agree CF is mostly pretty civil. In part this is due to the moderating (which is never an easy task). I only participate in SailNet, so can't comment on SA. Given what I've heard of SA, I'm not inclined to waste my time there. I waste enough time here .

[captain58sailin]

It can really depend on the subject, sometimes we get a really informative discourse about things of interest, and then I've seen some of the most benign sounding subjects reduced to a pick fest. As the Op stated, who knows might be behind the avatar, when you meet in person, you might become good friends. When I make my next personal voyage, I hope to meet up with as many CF ers that are on my course line as possible.