It all comes down to trust........
In yourself and in whom you choose as a mate. All people have baggage. Some have huge trunks, some large suitcases, others have diminished it to carry on size.
When you have had failures it's so easy to blame the other person's actions. But what did you learn? I'm not saying horrible behavior is at all acceptable, I'm just asking aren't you part to blame for making a bad choice in the first place? When you were dating these people were there character flaws that you over looked? Red
flags ignored? Incompatibility issues ignored? Did you continually forgive until the last straw? And/or figure that one day that person might come around and be the person you really wanted? So did you either passively and/or aggressively try to change them?
All of this negative whining and bitterness and taking stabs in general at the opposite sex lately, in more than one thread. Sometimes amusing, true, but also such an under
current of despise and hostility. Stop playing the lowly victim card! Own your part in it and move on, forgive yourself and adjust your
sails accordingly!
I am divorced. I raised three beautiful
children. Do I think all
men are the same? No! Would I marry again? Yes, because it's the ultimate commitment. It's having both feet on board and on the team. It's about setting and accomplishing common goals. It's not about shacking up and having an escape
route in the event you made a poor decision based on lust and the lies you might tell yourself. If you're so concerned about your assets there are pre-nups to protect what ever wealth you've accrued on your own. A relationship to me means 100 % commitment on both sides.
If you are happy with the good for now,
serial monogamy, "If I want to get out quick with as little hassle or responsibility to me" attitude then in my opinion you are selfish and really not to be taken seriously as a partner. Or too wounded from the past to be a participant. It means to me you are unsure of your own decision. If a person is unwilling to proclaim in front of others, or to their God, that they are willing to love, honor, respect, cherish, and declare faithfulness .......well they are unwilling then aren't they?
Wha! Wha, wha. Wha, wha! Make your decisions but take responsibility for them and stop all the bashing and pity parties! It's not conducive to a laid back cruising life style IMO and serves nothing but to perpetuate anger, resentment, negative, and dark side feedings.
Rant over
Peace, love, & hugs