How do you deal with a bad captain?

[socaldmax]

Originally Posted by Wrong

He's old. HE'S DEAF!

Or,

Maybe like my Brother he has only an OUTDOOR voice.

Drives me absolutely up the wall.

You have a seemingly endless supply of excuses for the old coot.

Here, let me help out...

about 40 yrs ago he was in a dive bar in the Everglades and there was a large glass jar full of $20 bills on the counter, probably $4,000 he estimated. He asked the bartender about it and he was told if he'd like to take the $200 bet, he too could try to win the money.

All he had to do was drink an entire gallon of peppermint flavored tequila without throwing up, then remove the rotten tooth from the alligator out back, then go upstairs to satisfy the elderly madam, who once decimated an entire basketball team back in her (much) younger years.

At first, he declined the bet, but after (quite) a few beers and shouts of encouragement from the locals, he slapped his $200 on the bar and told the bartender he'd take that bet!

The bartender produced the gallon jug of peppermint tequila and he made the most awful faces and gurgling noises as he he managed to gag that horrible stuff down. Then he staggered out back and everyone inside heard horrible screaming and bellowing and thrashing and bashing noises, until they heard a horrible silence...

The crazy old coot staggered back in and said, "Now where's that old lady with the bad tooth?"





But the crowd realized, looking at him, that he had gotten his unit bit off by the drunken amorous encounter with the alligator, and since then, he's always been a "cranky" old coot.

[Wrong]

Way too many apologists here. Don't see the point in reading the drivel any more...

[Wrong]

Originally Posted by socaldmax

You have a seemingly endless supply of excuses for the old coot.

Here, let me help out...

about 40 yrs ago he was in a dive bar in the Everglades and there was a large glass jar full of $20 bills on the counter, probably $4,000 he estimated. He asked the bartender about it and he was told if he'd like to take the $200 bet, he too could try to win the money.

All he had to do was drink an entire gallon of peppermint flavored tequila without throwing up, then remove the rotten tooth from the alligator out back, then go upstairs to satisfy the elderly madam, who once decimated an entire basketball team back in her (much) younger years.

At first, he declined the bet, but after (quite) a few beers and shouts of encouragement from the locals, he slapped his $200 on the bar and told the bartender he'd take that bet!

The bartender produced the gallon jug of peppermint tequila and he made the most awful faces and gurgling noises as he he managed to gag that horrible stuff down. Then he staggered out back and everyone inside heard horrible screaming and bellowing and thrashing and bashing noises, until they heard a horrible silence...

The crazy old coot staggered back in and said, "Now where's that old lady with the bad tooth?"





But the crowd realized, looking at him, that he had gotten his unit bit off by the drunken amorous encounter with the alligator, and since then, he's always been a "cranky" old coot.

Things are looking up now. Maybe I'll stay on a spell longer.

[jmczzz]

Sounds to me like the captain did you a favor, tried to give you some sea time and experience. You two just pirouetted and jumped cause of your hurt feelings!
Mmmm sounds like you don't know how to suck it up and be "crew". I hope you have not soured him for the next new sailor that wants a shot. Just maybe you could’ a learned something from the old dog.
jmczzz

[tropicalescape]

Originally Posted by Wrong

Things are looking up now. Maybe I'll stay on a spell longer.

Yea that sh funny

[s/v Beth]

Originally Posted by jmczzz

Sounds to me like the captain did you a favor, tried to give you some sea time and experience. You two just pirouetted and jumped cause of your hurt feelings!
Mmmm sounds like you don't know how to suck it up and be "crew". I hope you have not soured him for the next new sailor that wants a shot. Just maybe you could’ a learned something from the old dog.
jmczzz

HEY! This tread is getting Abusive! One more crack out of youse and I'm reporting youse to SWL!

All kidding aside- if he was angry and yelled all the time (I know people like that here on CF!) I guess I would have done a ancient ritual and then left his boat.

[jmczzz]

what's a swl? James

[Bulawayo]

Originally Posted by jmczzz

Sounds to me like the captain did you a favor, tried to give you some sea time and experience. You two just pirouetted and jumped cause of your hurt feelings!
Mmmm sounds like you don't know how to suck it up and be "crew". I hope you have not soured him for the next new sailor that wants a shot. Just maybe you could’ a learned something from the old dog.
jmczzz

Mmmmm.......kangaroo court going on hereabouts? How can so many people judge the couple wrong? Granted we have heard only one side of the story but I sure as heck wouldn't want many of these responders people on a jury - or maybe they recognise the behaviour ?
We have on occassions taken on crew (we never pay) and most of the experiences have been favourable, regardless of experience.

[s/v Beth]

Originally Posted by jmczzz

what's a swl? James

That is not a "swl" like what you do with your rum.

That is Ms. Sea Worthy Lass (SWL) all caps to you bud! All the OP had to say was that she was SWL's little sister and we all would have know that she was right...

I think there is discrimination in sailing, but not the way you think.

We cut lots of slack for old salty types, whether male or female. Look at boaty and seahag. If they are actually out there on the water most of the time their opinion is placed highest.

Us part time cruisers are somewhere in the middle.

And the riff-raff are those that insist on their opinion even though they have rarely been in the ocean.

Not saying its right or wrong. Just the way I see it. And it is a normal trend. Try coming into my Operating Room and telling me how to do my job...

[leftbrainstuff]

Your personal safety is job one as crew. A captains role is to look after his crew, the boat and be a good citizen on the water. Some of these requirements are law others are expected.

Unfortunately your experience is all too common.

My wife and I made the decision early on that we wouldn't crew for others except for day trips and only if the captain, crew and boat met our minimum safety standards.



Sent from my SM-N900T using Cruisers Sailing Forum mobile app

[Wrong]

Yawn.

[hoppy]

This thread should perhaps be merged with http://www.cruisersforum.com/forums/...so-143168.html

2 months, small boat, a couple and a skipper who is used to solo... Sounds like a recipe for success

Cooking food and arriving at a port at night does sound to me like the skipper might have felt like he was running a skippered charter and needed to blow off some steam.

[jmczzz]

I guess this is not the place for a retired Merchant Seaman and Ocean Operator that just has a liile boat. I still do not understand what I said abusive. but I'm out of here.
Oh and btw i am not nor do I want to be your "bud"
peace and love, James

[ohdrinkboy]

I've had some good chuckles from this thread.

The whole sexist I can do anything a man can is such BS. We all have different physical and mental abilities. I will never play in the NFL, NBA or MLB. Lindsey Vonn is a way better skier than me. Am I a better sailor than you NoQuarter....highly likely. Does that make either one of us a better person than the other....no way.

I've learned from this thread about, just as I try to do from all situations. Hopefully you leave this thread more enlightened too.

Fair winds.

[captlloyd]

Originally Posted by zeehag

ij
what would i have done ??
1--i da sucked up my noodles which should have been given AFTER the busy time
2--i da learned what i coulda learned as much and fast as i could while asking questions about rationale
3-i da had coffee or somesuch on land to see if personalities meshed.
HOWEVER, as you are still too new to know what to ask, this could be most difficult.
asvyou statev hat you have a boat-- go out and sail it.
learn to read weather before you are stuck in a bad situation
learn what to ask on next big adventure.
the only way to learn this is to DO it.
have a merry life
oh and btw...sailing IS sexist. always was always will be. grow thicker skin or find some kind of girl play.

yes i AM a sailing female curmudgeon, and i been learning since i was seven years of age and lived aboard in a mans world since 1990..yes i too am a neophyte as are we all in this lifestyle, until we die, hopefully at sea.

btw..i DO know BAD skipper/ owners and yes i have sailed with them ...yours was not a bad cpt. he was testing you. you unfortunately failed.
sorry. facts and nothing but the facts
what to do now?? when i was stranded in a strange land by a yelling bligh i went home n used my new found knowledge base to my advantage.
i went out sailing again on opb with a curmudgeon for a near year and.learned even more.
now i cruise my own ketch in warm tropical waters.

this captain is bad stuff is important in learning and development and growth.
those who stay with this lifestyle grow thick skins and continue to learn.at least yer not a male nurse in a womans world. talk about sexism.....

Seems to me you assume a lot about the character of this guy they were sailing with. It seems to me he was a jerk who can't handle authority. Give some people a position of authority and it goes right to their heads. They did the right thing, got off of the boat.