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Old 25-06-2009, 03:12   #16
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DOJ, you forgot to add "send photo of boat"
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Old 25-06-2009, 04:39   #17
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This reminds me of the time when I sailed into English Harbor with a couple of German gals who wanted to sail hitch hike through the islands. Language problems and no help with the boat... So I come along the slipway for water, fuel and a tie up to clear in and the Germans sat around looking... pretty.
I can assure folk that I won't be sitting around looking pretty Although I have been known to wear a bikini on a few occassions - but that was purely when dancing. in a bar. Sadly long closed now .

But if required to seal the deal I would be willing to do so again (after enuf beer and in the right (???!!) circumstances maybe hard to stop me ).

Anyway, I hope my honesty does not put any women off My copy of Cosmo (c. 1987) says that women love honesty. my experiances since 1987 say that not always strictly true, but............
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Old 25-06-2009, 05:04   #18
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Hey David this sounds like a better plan than pursing that elusive pirate girl .
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Old 25-06-2009, 07:35   #19
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Liquor store.....and....no teeth, maybe?
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Old 25-06-2009, 15:18   #20
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I'm here to answer your ad -- we've been looking for a floating nanny for our 5 year old son for a while. So you can move on board and be in charge of him so the captain and I can have some private time.

(schoonerdog's wife)
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Old 25-06-2009, 15:30   #21
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You are in luck David; there is this one woman I have heard about with her own sailboat who has recently been considering taking on a mate.

I understand the boat is well founded; she is a capable master with particular proficiency in knot work and keeping her tools sharpened.

Those that know her say she is personable, intelligent, possessing a determined mind set.

Apparently after an unpleasant matrimonial incident that made the headlines, she went to sea in her own sailboat and left her husband holding the short end of the stick.

If I remember correctly her married name was Bobbitt, but I understand she is a much changed person and you should have no trouble getting your 10 hours after 11pm.

PM me if you are interested.
I think my estranged has a set of her signature edition knives...Glad I did not hang around for a test.
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Old 25-06-2009, 15:49   #22
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I'm here to answer your ad -- we've been looking for a floating nanny for our 5 year old son for a while. So you can move on board and be in charge of him so the captain and I can have some private time.

(schoonerdog's wife)
Brilliant. I arrive on Tuesday (maybe give you time to tell Schoonerdog the good news? ).

BTW what brand of beer does your son prefer? and does his pocket money permit him to stand his own rounds? .
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Old 25-06-2009, 16:30   #23
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Brilliant. I arrive on Tuesday (maybe give you time to tell Schoonerdog the good news? ).

BTW what brand of beer does your son prefer? and does his pocket money permit him to stand his own rounds? .
He's a rum kind of guy and he's got a treasure chest full of coins. I think you guys will get along famously!

And no relationship string attached!
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Old 25-06-2009, 17:39   #24
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David .... I suspect you and I would get along famously .... unfortunately if we hung out together we most certainly would get, at minimum, arrested .... and the authorities would throw away the key!

William aka 'The PIRATE'
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Old 26-06-2009, 04:24   #25
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This reminds me of the advert in the "Missing" section of local paper

"Wife, dog and boat missing"................"Reward for dog and boat"
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Old 26-06-2009, 09:33   #26
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a "Captain with benefits" arrangement
I send you PM.
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Old 26-06-2009, 09:38   #27
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As Shakespeare said, “many a true word is spoken in jest,”
I had been thinking of posting something like that, but in my case not tongue-in-cheek—assuming Dave’s is? But I could not get up the nerve.
I also know, "faint heart never won fair lady," so here I go.
The economic downturn has dashed many people’s boating dreams, including mine, and maybe also some lady out there who can’t afford to take her boat where she wants, for one reason or another, without meeting someone else. If you are in this boat (ha!), send me a private message and we can talk, after all, “nothing ventured, nothing gained.”
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Old 26-06-2009, 10:20   #28
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Wow! I had thought when DOJ put this thread up that many would make light of his sincere offer, even mock him. But seeing that Miss_Bikini has responded so positively, I can only admire David's testicular fortitude for making his offer so publicly.

Miss_Bikini sounds almost too good to be true, but it seems self-evident now that an all-female crew of Swedish swimsuit models would be desperate for a Captain such as DOJ. And really, how hard can it be to be Captain of a galleon lying in the Caribbean? Why, it was already routine three hundred years ago!


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Old 26-06-2009, 10:51   #29
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uhh.... your issue of Cosmo is out of date....... be very careful with that "being honest with women" thing.......
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Old 26-06-2009, 11:44   #30
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i like honest men, so do most women. What we dont like is mealy mouthed, half hearted men with no backbone or integrity.
Not to be confused with being in touch with their feminine side as that can mean something different but a man who is a mans man will always be admired and respected.
I can accept the truth but I hate lies and evasion of responsibilities
Think John Wayne, Clint Eastwod, Harrison Ford etc.
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