When you are the "odd" person on the block

KayKay58 · 15-03-2008, 17:04

Hi everyone, I haven't posted much, just joined, but I have really enjoyed all the good advice being given. My husband and I are hopefully getting ready to start living our "dream". Hubby has always been smitten by sailing, although I think I can count on one hand the # of times he's gone out, and all those were without me. You know, BM (before marrige). We are selling our home, and are arranging to purchase a 38ft Heritage Custom, in need of work, most definitly! But the downpour of disapproval from our friends and family have been mind-boggeling! We got our Open Water diver cert. 2 years ago, and all our kids are grown and gone. We are still pretty young (49, but don't tell anyone, lol) and they all think we're crazy!! I would like some advice on how to shut them up, once and for all!! Just call me "Determined"!

PBzeer · 15-03-2008, 17:14

You can't shut them up, only get on with YOUR dream.

darkmetal · 15-03-2008, 17:20

hi kaykay58
let me tell you our plans we lived in scotland and now live in france (two years now) with the plan of selling up in 2 or 3 years time to buy our yacht then sail for 4-5 years in the med then the rest of the world all this with never even been on a yacht but its what dreams are made off so go for it.

cooper · 15-03-2008, 17:21

Shutting them up is easy.........send them a postcard of a nice beach, saying "thinking of you all, having a wonderful time, tell you about it when not so busy" ; )

ssullivan · 15-03-2008, 18:03

Those people who are giving you a hard time are usually angry because they made choices in their lives that prevented them from having the kind of fun you are about to have.

Best thing to do, unfortunately, is just tune them out. You may lose a few friends, but life is more quiet and serene without the nagging/trash talking of those kinds of people.

We shed tons of friends and family when we first moved aboard. People were real jerks about it. Now that we don't talk to any of them, things are more peaceful and happy.

MarkJ · 15-03-2008, 18:56

Quote:

Originally Posted by KayKay58

I would like some advice on how to shut them up, once and for all!! Just call me "Determined"!

Don't tell them stuff.

Just do it, and then tell them at your going away party.

Thats what we did.

We first told our friends on the invitation for our party on 23 Febuary - 3 weeks ago. We left for the USA 2 and a half weeks ago and now in the Carribean where we have TODAY just putting the deposit on our boat, a Beneteau 39 footer x-charter but nice.

So it doesnt matter what they say or how they wriggle, its happenened and none of the nay-sayers got a chance.

If you are determained then just do it, don't talk about it, just DO IT!

Mark

**David M** · 15-03-2008, 19:04

Your not crazy....they are envious but will never admit it. I like the previous idea of sending postcards from paradise. Who really are the crazy ones? Those sending the postcards from paradise or those receiving them doing the rat race?

Pelagic · 15-03-2008, 19:11

"When you are the "odd" person on the block ",

Just simply move away from the block-heads and get on with your life.

They wont change their minds until a few years down the road and by then your good friends and family will be happy for you and the others don't matter!

**Hud3** · 15-03-2008, 19:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarkJ

Don't tell them stuff.

Just do it, and then tell them at your going away party.

Thats what we did.

We first told our friends on the invitation for our party on 23 Febuary - 3 weeks ago. We left for the USA 2 and a half weeks ago and now in the Carribean where we have TODAY just putting the deposit on our boat, a Beneteau 39 footer x-charter but nice.

So it doesnt matter what they say or how they wriggle, its happenened and none of the nay-sayers got a chance.

If you are determained then just do it, don't talk about it, just DO IT!

Mark

Mark J,

Where are you in the Caribbean ? And CONGRATULATIONS, by the way!!!!

maxingout · 15-03-2008, 19:26

Three important facts of life are:

1. Life's not fair.
2. They will never understand.
3. You only get one life, and it should be pleasing to you.

One of my favorite sayings is "What you think of me is none of my business." For me that says it all.

You not only have to ignore what other people think, you don't even want to know what they think. It's much better off that way.

It's your dream, and they will never understand.

MarkJ · 15-03-2008, 19:33

Quote:

Originally Posted by Hud3

Mark J,

Where are you in the Caribbean ? And CONGRATULATIONS, by the way!!!!

St Maarten. And thanks! Its been busy and theres all the ends to tie up, but Nicolle and I feel great! The whole process for the last year of all the what we call 'stepping stones' has been very challenging and still theres 'things' trying to derail us. So for Kay, I would suggest that if we told everyone a blow by blow description of all the stuff we have been through, then our friends would have added enough negativity to make the job much, much harder!

Mark
PS 9.32pm is bedtime during boat buying time. Hows that for a celebration? We will have a quiet ale when we're on board and we've posted those postcards!

Therapy · 15-03-2008, 19:36

Quote:

Originally Posted by MarkJ

Did we just buy a boat?????? *Gulp* We DID just buy a boat!

Good for you!

Pelagic · 15-03-2008, 19:43

Congratulations Mark and Nicolle for being one step closer!

I know these are stressful times with a lot of second guessing and details about the pending purchase, so stick to your guns through the negotiation as it is very much a buyers market.

Let us know when it all goes through and any technical doubts, we are here to help!
Cheers!

pogo · 15-03-2008, 19:48

Way to GO Mark!!

Good advice all. I am leaving for Bermuda on May 15th. There has always been a lot of "naysayers" but if memory serves me right....

All of my earlier trips lead to numerous questions about what and where I went. Followed by congratulations for doing it,and/or a lot of questions about how they wished they could have done the same thing.

It is all about priorities..

Live life now, you can't do it when your dead.

johneri1 · 15-03-2008, 20:08

Would TRUE friends react with disapproval? Family. . .I am unsure why genetic herritance requires special attention, especially to a negative reaction. I am happy for you, as are many others on this forum. When it comes right down to it, a lifetime only produces a handful of true friends, inclusive of family. Go for it and be happy!

15-03-2008, 17:04	#1
KayKay58 Registered User Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Lake Texoma, Texas Boat: Cal 9.2 30ft Phoeinx Posts: 15 Images: 2	When you are the "odd" person on the block Hi everyone, I haven't posted much, just joined, but I have really enjoyed all the good advice being given. My husband and I are hopefully getting ready to start living our "dream". Hubby has always been smitten by sailing, although I think I can count on one hand the # of times he's gone out, and all those were without me. You know, BM (before marrige). We are selling our home, and are arranging to purchase a 38ft Heritage Custom, in need of work, most definitly! But the downpour of disapproval from our friends and family have been mind-boggeling! We got our Open Water diver cert. 2 years ago, and all our kids are grown and gone. We are still pretty young (49, but don't tell anyone, lol) and they all think we're crazy!! I would like some advice on how to shut them up, once and for all!! Just call me "Determined"!

15-03-2008, 17:14	#2
PBzeer Registered User Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Cruising Boat: Ontario 32 - Aria Posts: 132	You can't shut them up, only get on with YOUR dream. __________________ John Ontario 32 - "Aria" Within a dream, we may find a fantasy, But never within a fantasy, will we live a dream.

15-03-2008, 17:20	#3
darkmetal Registered User Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: scotland/france Boat: none at the moment Posts: 7	hi kaykay58 let me tell you our plans we lived in scotland and now live in france (two years now) with the plan of selling up in 2 or 3 years time to buy our yacht then sail for 4-5 years in the med then the rest of the world all this with never even been on a yacht but its what dreams are made off so go for it. __________________ [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]www.lechardonecossais.com

15-03-2008, 17:21	#4
cooper Registered User Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Back of the Dandenongs, Australia Posts: 932 Images: 6	Shutting them up is easy.........send them a postcard of a nice beach, saying "thinking of you all, having a wonderful time, tell you about it when not so busy" ; ) __________________ One ferro 30 on the water, one steel 38 on the land, .........not a lot of time.....

15-03-2008, 19:04	#7
David M Moderator Site Helper Join Date: Sep 2007 Location: San Francisco Bay Posts: 2,765	Your not crazy....they are envious but will never admit it. I like the previous idea of sending postcards from paradise. Who really are the crazy ones? Those sending the postcards from paradise or those receiving them doing the rat race? __________________ David "Marge! Look at all the great stuff I found at the Marina. It was just sitting in some guys boat!" -Homer Simpson Last edited by David M; 15-03-2008 at 19:13.

15-03-2008, 18:03	#5
ssullivan Commercial Vendor Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 4,533 Images: 1	Those people who are giving you a hard time are usually angry because they made choices in their lives that prevented them from having the kind of fun you are about to have. Best thing to do, unfortunately, is just tune them out. You may lose a few friends, but life is more quiet and serene without the nagging/trash talking of those kinds of people. We shed tons of friends and family when we first moved aboard. People were real jerks about it. Now that we don't talk to any of them, things are more peaceful and happy.

15-03-2008, 19:11	#8
Pelagic Registered User Join Date: Oct 2007 Boat: Van Helleman Schooner 65ft StarGazer Posts: 1,090	"When you are the "odd" person on the block ", Just simply move away from the block-heads and get on with your life. They wont change their minds until a few years down the road and by then your good friends and family will be happy for you and the others don't matter! Last edited by Pelagic; 15-03-2008 at 19:33.

15-03-2008, 19:26	#10
maxingout Registered User Join Date: Dec 2006 Location: Fort Pierce, Phoenix Boat: Privilege 39 Catamaran Posts: 532	Three important facts of life are: 1. Life's not fair. 2. They will never understand. 3. You only get one life, and it should be pleasing to you. One of my favorite sayings is "What you think of me is none of my business." For me that says it all. You not only have to ignore what other people think, you don't even want to know what they think. It's much better off that way. It's your dream, and they will never understand. __________________ Dave Exit Only

15-03-2008, 19:43	#13
Pelagic Registered User Join Date: Oct 2007 Boat: Van Helleman Schooner 65ft StarGazer Posts: 1,090	Congratulations Mark and Nicolle for being one step closer! I know these are stressful times with a lot of second guessing and details about the pending purchase, so stick to your guns through the negotiation as it is very much a buyers market. Let us know when it all goes through and any technical doubts, we are here to help! Cheers!

15-03-2008, 19:48	#14
pogo Registered User Join Date: Jan 2008 Posts: 91	That's the ticket! Way to GO Mark!! Good advice all. I am leaving for Bermuda on May 15th. There has always been a lot of "naysayers" but if memory serves me right.... All of my earlier trips lead to numerous questions about what and where I went. Followed by congratulations for doing it,and/or a lot of questions about how they wished they could have done the same thing. It is all about priorities.. Live life now, you can't do it when your dead.

15-03-2008, 20:08	#15
johneri1 Registered User Join Date: Dec 2007 Location: Newport, OR/Pocatello, ID Boat: Newport MKII 30 - Solution Posts: 172	Would TRUE friends react with disapproval? Family. . .I am unsure why genetic herritance requires special attention, especially to a negative reaction. I am happy for you, as are many others on this forum. When it comes right down to it, a lifetime only produces a handful of true friends, inclusive of family. Go for it and be happy! __________________ Eric N30

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