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Old 03-03-2014, 17:14   #61
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

Teknav, you make some very good points. However, back in the day in Utah as a working, non-Mormon woman I might as well been the anti-Christ after my divorce! I have different criteria for choosing friends now that are more alined with what you said. Thanks for the reminder!

Robyn
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Old 03-03-2014, 17:25   #62
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

Here is a story from the other side. Being single I found that I was mistrusted by a lot of the married women when I was friends with their husbands because they viewed me as a threat. Not from a sexual point of view, but they thought that their hubbies would envy my lifestyle of being free and doing what I wanted.

Even worse, the husbands would use me as an excuse to go out. "He needs a friend to talk to, won't be long love".
One guy was having an affair and told his wife that he and I would go to the movies once a week.( now that sounds very strange to me never mind her) Problem was, he never told me. When his wife asked how I enjoyed the last movie I did not have a clue what she was talking about. Never saw him again,

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Old 03-03-2014, 17:33   #63
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

Ok I'm confused. Our boat is in my husband's name. No secretive planning on this; it just happened as we own properties jointly that make the boat monetarily minor. So if he goes before me, I get the boat. Here in the US we understand it to be that way. Not that I desire a life on it without him. I don't desire the government to have it.
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Old 03-03-2014, 17:34   #64
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

Coops, I can see how it can go both ways. But I do think women are way more threatened by a single female than male.

Robyn
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Old 03-03-2014, 17:43   #65
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

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Ok I'm confused. Our boat is in my husband's name. No secretive planning on this; it just happened as we own properties jointly that make the boat monetarily minor. So if he goes before me, I get the boat. Here in the US we understand it to be that way. Not that I desire a life on it without him. I don't desire the government to have it.

Skippy, I think if you stay in the US you will be OK if the will supports you inheriting everything. But once you leave the US to go cruising in foreign countries you may not have the protection you think. So one of the side benefits of this thread that I hadn't thought of is advice on how to get 'your ducks in a row' before leaving so that if the unthinkable happened you and your property would be protected.

Robyn
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Old 03-03-2014, 17:43   #66
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

As I have never been able to get in touch with my feminine side I will take your word for it. I am just a knuckle dragging dinosaur, oh, that is somebody else on here, sorry.

We now await paranoid replies.

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Old 03-03-2014, 17:52   #67
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

Coops,

did dinosaurs have knuckles?
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Old 03-03-2014, 17:59   #68
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

The Knucklesauruses did.

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Old 03-03-2014, 18:26   #69
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

Of course! I should have known! :-D
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Old 03-03-2014, 18:41   #70
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

Quote:
Originally Posted by SmartMove View Post
Skippy, I think if you stay in the US you will be OK if the will supports you inheriting everything. But once you leave the US to go cruising in foreign countries you may not have the protection you think. So one of the side benefits of this thread that I hadn't thought of is advice on how to get 'your ducks in a row' before leaving so that if the unthinkable happened you and your property would be protected.

Robyn
I had never thought of this but now that the subject comes up, just exactly what ducks should I line up?

American with American wife and boat documented by USCG that also had to be registered in the state of Florida. Besides the obvious; both names on each of these, what else is there?
And should they say "and" or "or"?
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Old 03-03-2014, 18:51   #71
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

There's a post from CarstenB earlier in this thread, with the wording of a document he has which states the rights of his survivor to make any and all decisions on the boat. It is more specific than what I have written here.

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Old 04-03-2014, 00:35   #72
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

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I had never thought of this but now that the subject comes up, just exactly what ducks should I line up?

American with American wife and boat documented by USCG that also had to be registered in the state of Florida. Besides the obvious; both names on each of these, what else is there?
And should they say "and" or "or"?
I have no idea how the laws work in the US, although I suspect it is different from state to state. As soon as you leave the US, however, local country laws come into effect. Among them are impoundment while awaiting settlement of the estate (this can take a very long time, and end up being very expensive as documents need to be translated, filed and usually you need a local lawyers help etc) In the meantime, the authorities might take the view that since they are impounding the boat, the survivor can't live on it. Now what?

Many countries take the concept of the Master of the boat (captain) quite seriously. A short document similar to what I have noted earlier, clears a hell of a lot of hurdles out of the way. The survivor is now officially Master of the boat, with authority to do what they want with the boat.

If you don't think my document goes far enough, add another document, co-signed by both owners directing that the First Mate become Captain and does what they want with the boat.

It is a simple document, and notarization costs almost nothing.
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Old 04-03-2014, 02:21   #73
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

I realized I was in love with sailing and cruising when I was married back in the 80's. Long since divorced, I decided almost two years ago, at 52, that not having a husband wouldn't keep me from my dreams. Most husbands would have just clipped my wings anyway. My boyfriend tried to talk me out of buying a boat. I flew to Florida and did it anyway.

I also decided that if I didn't do it now, I would never do it and "voila" ... I found myself a cruising boat. I think I did this "losing spouse" thing backwards.

There is a certain mystique about a boat built for cruising that captures one's spirit and holds on tight. I tend to attract very interesting friends. I don't normally worry about having people around or friends to help. Many of my newest friends are highly intelligent people that also work on boats for a living. So far they've managed to show me how to do a lot.

I have to wonder if anyone might see me as the "threat" people were speaking of. Then I realize I am most likely considered way too much of a handful to be any kind of threat!
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Old 04-03-2014, 04:46   #74
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

+1 👍.
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Old 04-03-2014, 04:52   #75
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Re: What Would You Do If You Lost Your Partner?

Quote:
Originally Posted by carstenb View Post
I have no idea how the laws work in the US, although I suspect it is different from state to state. As soon as you leave the US, however, local country laws come into effect. Among them are impoundment while awaiting settlement of the estate (this can take a very long time, and end up being very expensive as documents need to be translated, filed and usually you need a local lawyers help etc) In the meantime, the authorities might take the view that since they are impounding the boat, the survivor can't live on it. Now what?



Many countries take the concept of the Master of the boat (captain) quite seriously. A short document similar to what I have noted earlier, clears a hell of a lot of hurdles out of the way. The survivor is now officially Master of the boat, with authority to do what they want with the boat.



If you don't think my document goes far enough, add another document, co-signed by both owners directing that the First Mate become Captain and does what they want with the boat.



It is a simple document, and notarization costs almost nothing.


Therapy, what Carsten said above is what I am referring to. But I also realize we should have copies of our wills and the LLC documentation on board. I did think to bring our marriage certificate though.

Robyn
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