Sexist Views...

[Ocean Girl]

Georgetheleo....yawn.

[geoleo]

Ocean girl------pu

[LoveMyWoodie]

Originally Posted by Tellie

Ok, I had to think for a while to come up with a sexism story like everybody else. I almost forgot it because frankly things like that I really could care less about. But as I was talking to Mrs. Tellie she reminded me of a personal one I had to deal with that I forgot about. Not just one incident but an ongoing one for over three years. When I closed out my electrical business years ago my daughter was still in grade school. I had some rental real estate and my wifes job was doing well. So I decided to become Mr. Mom for a while. I got involved in my daughters school and after school activities. The best three years I've ever spent and I recommend it to all Dads. But back then I was the only Dad or male involved in the school and it wasn't as popular as it seems to be becoming now. But I was the target of sexism all the time, from the "Look" from the mother dominated arena, to suspicion of a male around little children making sure there was always a female present when I was in a class room or in an area where there might be access to children. I was appreciated when the fence needed to be fixed, the roof leaked, electrical problems occured or lifting heavy boxes was needed. I never got invited to the fund raising cup cake baking sessions at a mothers house, or was my input needed when decorating the rooms for holiday occasions. I was asked all the time what I did for a living and how I had all this time to spend at my daughters school and functions. When what they were really asking is why wasn't I out working and leave the women dominated arena to the mothers. I could make a list a mile long of many other things that I dealt with because of my gender. Those were the best three plus years I ever invested in my daughters life. So in reconsideration of the question as to whether women understand sexism, I say of course they do, they can take part in it just as much as they claim men do.

Well written and well said....been there and walked that mile or two with a lovely child and a wonderful woman....thanks for the memories...her mom is gone but I still have a very good friend whom ,now is a doctor of psychology...Cheers Mate, we are blessed...hope to meet you out on the water.

[JPA Cate]

add[QUOTE=Target9000;1353232]I am a southerner. I grew up around places that had no stop lights and I was raised by people that were what a lot of people might call traditional.

I open doors for ladies and I "ma'am" and "sir" people who are younger than I am!

Some people, especially women, will sometimes get this look of shock on their face when I say. It doesn't mean we think someone is old. It means we think they deserve respect. Its embarrassing to me when it just slips out and I realize I've hurt someone's feelings. I feel discourteous when I don't do it though. Problems of a child raised by conservatives living in a PC era.

A lot has been made of the disparity of treatment of the genders. But I often wonder more about the reason than the actual act. Does opening a door for a lady stem from some deep belief that women are inferior and they cannot open a door themselves? Or does it come from a traditional show of respect? Does having a different mental state about it even matter?

And finally, I believe stereotypes exist for a reason. The human mind is designed to pick out patterns. These patterns form a bias and this is a simple tool our minds used to protect us. If every time you saw a purple dog it bit you, then you'd probably have an aversion to purple dogs. The same holds true in more mundane situations. If a salesperson found that nine out of ten men she spoke to were ignorant about what she is selling, she'd probably get more inquisitive and preachy towards men. If she does this because she feels men are losers, then that is sad and it will probably come across in convo. If she does it to be helpful (using her natural ability to pattern match and infer) then should we call it sexism?

A lot of this stuff has gotten so muddled by the conflicting forces on either side of it. One one side you have the recent past in which women were ill treated and some vestiges remain. On the other side, you have the progressives pushing for a PC future and turning personal bias political. It makes for a very confusing middle.

[COLOR="Blue"]In the end I think we should just be respectful and loving to those that deserve it, be open to those we don't know, and simply let go of those that we shouldn't associate with. Giving some time to get to know someone may clear up the reasons behind some perceived "slight".[/COLOR=Blue

Basically, I agree with most of the above highlighted statement, but I'm not really sure that ignoring male chauvinism where it occurs is either kind or respectful to women. I do think that there are many women who are happy and successful in "pink" roles, and that there are some really nice men who like them just that way. But I also do think that a little pro-active education can be helpful. Or even outright confrontation. The Indian in Fiji gentleman who tried to knock me off the sidewalk was not after that a gentleman in my estimation, it's a culture thing: they expect their women there to stay physically out of their way. I changed my sidewalk behavior after that, and "lurked", waiting for an opportunity for a little off-balancing of my own. In it's turn, a product of American feminist influence. But, fortunately for me, the situation did not arise again. However, as one leaves the U.S. and travels afield, one encounters men on all different ranges of the feminist scale from 0 -10, chauvinist to feminist. And, as a woman, I think it is helpful to realize that even if we think we are egalitarian, and totally OK, others may neither like that or respect it. To what extent do you want to value the culture you're visiting? you are the guest, but if some woman comes to your boat in the middle of the night, bruised, and bleeding, how are you going to handle the situation? We visit and change the cultures we visit. Change, sometimes threatening change, is inescapable in life, I suspect.
In all my cruising years so far, the one simple thing I did to become a human being rather than a grandmother, was to tie a bowline in a dock line tossed to me by a catamaran, and place it over the pile on the pier I was asked to. After that, the old White fisherman who had taken our line the day before and not put it where I asked, suddenly decided I was worthy of notice, a human being, as it were, and treated me like a person. I'm not knockinig men here.
I can tell a female chauvinist story or two. But this is a cruising forum and perhaps we should discuss chauvinism as it relates to cruisers.

All for tonight.

Ann

[geoleo]

Woodies wonderful story should conclude this generally stupid Thread Bye BYE

[Celestialsailor]

I think we, as Men and Women should change the way we stereo-type one another. So I have come up with this new way of describing one another...

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:







1. She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a






BREASTED AMERICAN. '













2. She is not 'EASY' - She is






'HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.'














3. She is not a 'DUMB BLONDE' - She is a






'LIGHT-HAIRED DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPERHIGHWAY.'














4. She has not 'BEEN AROUND' - She is a






'PREVIOUSLY-ENJOYED COMPANION.'














5. She does not 'NAG' you - She becomes






'VERBALLY REPETITIVE.'













6. She is not a 'TWO-BIT HOOKER' - She is a






'LOW COST PROVIDER.'




















HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:














1. He does not have a 'BEER GUT' - He has developed a






'LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY.'














2. He is not a 'BAD DANCER' - He is






'OVERLY CAUCASIAN.'














3.. He does not 'GET LOST ALL THE TIME' - He






'INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.'














4. He is not 'BALDING' - He is in






'FOLLICLE REGRESSION.'














5. He does not act like a 'TOTAL ASS' - He develops a case of






RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION.'






(Loved this one!)














6. It's not his 'CRACK' you see hanging out of his pants - It's






'TROUSER CLEAVAGE.'

[LBW399]

Originally Posted by tamicatana

Y'all think the local yokels here at CF are bad, check these out:

7 Breathtakingly Sexist Quotes by Famous and Respected Male Authors – Flavorwire

I pretty much think those quotes in the link you provided are bang on the money. "Breathtakingly" correct in other words.

Bukowski especially.

[Rakuflames]

[QUOTE=Celestialsailor;1353645]I think we, as Men and Women should change the way we stereo-type one another. So I have come up with this new way of describing one another...

HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:







1. She is not a 'BABE' or a 'CHICK' - She is a






BREASTED AMERICAN. '


Etc. -- funny stuff!


I experienced something UNfunny yesterday, and I suspect that the fact that I'm a female played into it. I don't think the guy would have tried to pull this on a man.

I mentioned in another post that I got a Gale Sail. Well, it needed sheets. I wanted to be *certain* I got the right size for my winches. It seems to me it might be important to be able to control the sail predictably in a storm.

To be absolutely certain, I cut about 3" off one of the sheets for my Genny, because that sheet fits my self-tailing winches perfectly.

I took it to a place that sells both marine salvage and new parts. The man directed me to the line section, but I didn't find anything the diameter of what I brought. I have 3/8" on my boat and recognized it. It was too small. I saw 1/2" and used to have it on my boat. It was too big for its job. But to be sure, I compared them with my sample. Clearly, the line I needed was 7/16" -- that's what would be inbetween.

So I went back to the front desk and watched as the man held calipers on an angle and told me "Your line is 1/2". Well, no, it wasn't, and I finally convinced him of that. He directed me to another supplier where they compared, and saw that my sample was indeed 7/16".

I am a little horrified that this man would do that since he knew what the line was for. I explained very clearly. I just don't think he would have tried it on a man. Could be wrong, but I don't think so.

[jkindredpdx]

One of my favorite folks for advice from a chandlery. . . Kitty at Columbia River Marine Exchange. . . http://www.columbiamarineexchange.com/604.JPG . . . no sexism in that store and they ship anywhere.

[Rakuflames]

Originally Posted by jkindredpdx

One of my favorite folks for advice from a chandlery. . . Kitty at Columbia River Marine Exchange. . . http://www.columbiamarineexchange.com/604.JPG . . . no sexism in that store and they ship anywhere.

thanks. Always glad to have another source!

[Leliu5th]

If women had to rely on or wait for a man to do anything, it wouldn't get done! More than my 2cents~

[jkindredpdx]

Not suggesting anyone should RELY on another person, but hmmmmm isn't this a tiny bit of gender generalization? Hope no one tells my clients, friends, or kids...

BTW, obviously you can rely on us... for a quick reply

[Leliu5th]

Originally Posted by jkindredpdx

Not suggesting anyone should RELY on another person, but hmmmmm isn't this a tiny bit of gender generalization? Hope no one tells my clients, friends, or kids...

BTW, obviously you can rely on us... for a quick reply

Aye, let me explain, the men in Hawaii are very lazy, most don't have jobs and rely on women to do everything..... so it's and Island related thing~
Been doing this "life" alone so I took every job I could so I can rebuild a motor, fix just about anything around my place and I could probably build my own house.

Just saying yeah, no offense meant

[jkindredpdx]

Originally Posted by Leliu5th

Aye, let me explain, the men in Hawaii are very lazy, most don't have jobs and rely on women to do everything..... so it's and Island related thing~
Been doing this "life" alone so I took every job I could so I can rebuild a motor, fix just about anything around my place and I could probably build my own house.

Just saying yeah, no offense meant

No offense Taken My mother insisted I learn "domestic skills", I in turn forced both daughters to use hand tools and work on their own cars... all good skills to have.

BTW. My daughter lived in Hawaii for 4 years. Her youngest son cried the first time he had to put on shoes, said they felt like band-aids. (sorry for the tangent).

[D&D]

Originally Posted by jkindredpdx

...isn't this a tiny bit of gender generalization? ...

Indeed it is, altho perhaps that's this thread's basic premise...and so it continues...