Cruisers Forum
 


Join CruisersForum Today

Reply
 
Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 31-01-2016, 08:51   #16
Registered User

Join Date: Apr 2015
Posts: 82
Re: Married but sailing alone

My wife liked day sailing and limited coastal cruising, but had no interest in a big trip like the ICW and definitely no offshore. I explained this to a sailing friend who did not know my wife and his advice was "get a new wife".

My wife was a keeper, but now we have no boat.

She would have done the ICW but fortunately I recognized that she had to want to do it or it would spoil the experience for me and probably our relationship.

I have seen several couples who split up over this issue and I did not want that. I have done a lot of armchair sailing since on the various forums, and now believe that for us this was the best decision.

THINK IT THRU.
__________________

__________________
Classicsailboat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 08:58   #17
Registered User

Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 2,105
Re: Married but sailing alone

Take up golf instead.
__________________

__________________
reed1v is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 09:06   #18
Registered User
 
Musicaltrees's Avatar

Join Date: Feb 2013
Location: Georgia coastal waters
Boat: 1987 Pearson 33-2
Posts: 22
Re: Married but sailing alone

I was a lake sailor for a very long time. Our first date was on the sailboat. I proposed on the sailboat. Our honeymoon was on the sailboat. My long term passion to cruise was made crystal clear from day 1. Then suddenly her interest in sailing waned but she was cool with me taking trips here and there. I bought a boat on the coast and started planning our adventures. It came down to choosing her or the boat. I chose the boat. To forego my lifelong dream of cruising would turn me into someone who I am not . Some people seem to work it out… But it's always best if you share the same passions I feel. Best to you!
__________________
Musicaltrees is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 09:36   #19
Registered User

Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: So Cal
Boat: Catalina 30
Posts: 943
Re: Married but sailing alone

Quote:
Originally Posted by reed1v View Post
Take up golf instead.
So true. There has never been any marital disagreements about golf.
__________________
jeepbluetj is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 09:39   #20
Registered User

Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 2,105
Re: Married but sailing alone

Quote:
Originally Posted by jeepbluetj View Post
So true. There has never been any marital disagreements about golf.
Think Tiger Woods would disagree. Depends on the hole and the ball.
__________________
reed1v is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 10:00   #21
Registered User

Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: the Med
Boat: Nauta 54' by Scott Kaufman/S&S - 1989
Posts: 1,062
Images: 3
Re: Married but sailing alone

It makes me feel sad.

Ask yourself how much you love her..

I am single live aboard, but I met a woman I could keep boat dry 7 months in the winter, for her....
__________________
TheThunderbird is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 10:28   #22
Registered User
 
CaitB's Avatar

Join Date: Nov 2015
Location: Live in Oregon, boat in San Mateo
Boat: 1975 Cal 2-29
Posts: 33
Images: 3
Re: Married but sailing alone

My spouse a falconer and to get him to leave his hobby would be impossible. I travel a lot - alone - with no issues. He definitely is not a sailor and not a salt water guy and in fact, doesn't swim. I live going to Mexico, Australia and Bali to surf and several years ago I took off for a lengthy trip to Tibet to climb. We've been married 13 years with no issues...
__________________
Thefalconandthesnowman.com
CaitB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 10:32   #23
Marine Service Provider

Join Date: May 2013
Location: East Africa
Boat: catalac 10m
Posts: 351
Re: Married but sailing alone

Sailing alone in tropics you meet beautiful if not exquisite native beauties, going native will risk your marriage but honesttly who here can honestly say never having been tempted.
__________________
Goosebumps is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 10:46   #24
Registered User
 
jenders's Avatar

Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Homeport is Anacortes WA. Now sailing the Sea of Cortez
Boat: Pacific Seacraft "Crealock" 34'
Posts: 35
Re: Married but sailing alone

To: Skipmac, My partner suffered severe seasickness on our way down the West coast from Anacortes to Baja and beyond. She tried a number of remedies, including pills and patches. We eventually found bonine (generic meclizine) which helped her a lot. Might look into that. Good luck.
__________________
jenders is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 11:03   #25
Registered User

Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 2,105
Re: Married but sailing alone

Quote:
Originally Posted by CaitB View Post
My spouse a falconer and to get him to leave his hobby would be impossible. I travel a lot - alone - with no issues. He definitely is not a sailor and not a salt water guy and in fact, doesn't swim. I live going to Mexico, Australia and Bali to surf and several years ago I took off for a lengthy trip to Tibet to climb. We've been married 13 years with no issues...
A life insurance policy sure helps sweeten the parting.
__________________
reed1v is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 11:16   #26
Registered User
 
Celestialsailor's Avatar

Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: In Mexico, working on the boat
Boat: Hallberg Rassy 35. and 14ft.Whitehall pulling skiff.
Posts: 8,013
Images: 5
Re: Married but sailing alone

I had been unattached (un married) for 15 years. I just recently re-married. My wife, Nancy is a horse person...I am not. She enjoys the boat in port but has little desire to sail any more than in protected waters. We worked out that she comes and goes as she pleases with her friends via horse. It is also understood that my time is spent (usually 1/2 a season) on the boat, working and sailing her. It's nice not having to rent the house out anymore and someone taking care of things.
My former wife was onboard with my hobby at first but soon after marriage told me...'thanx for the house and you have your boat thing'. We divorced a year later. I have been sailing a long time. That said, I have a few other hobbies. Some day I will give up sailing for one reason or another. My goal is to live my dreams and live the life i have left to the fullest.
__________________
"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming: Wow - what a ride!"

http://wwwjolielle.blogspot.com/
Celestialsailor is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 11:28   #27
Registered User

Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 2,105
Re: Married but sailing alone

So there. Choice is between love of wife or love of boat. Personally I prefer the warm, comfy embrace of my dear wife at night, rather than opting for a material possession. But then, some folks prefer material items as the reason for living.
__________________
reed1v is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 11:32   #28
Registered User

Join Date: Dec 2014
Location: the Med
Boat: Nauta 54' by Scott Kaufman/S&S - 1989
Posts: 1,062
Images: 3
Re: Married but sailing alone

A Catalina 25 swing keel is not the best way to treat your spouse with class and style, maybe... isn't it!?

Sorry Man, I don't want to sound derogative. Indeed, I am sad..

Ask yourself How Much you love her, and possibly quit yachting for a while. You can always catch back on yachting, hardly so on a relationship..

Best!
__________________
TheThunderbird is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 11:35   #29
Registered User

Join Date: Feb 2011
Posts: 2,105
Re: Married but sailing alone

Quote:
Originally Posted by TheThunderbird View Post
A Catalina 25 swing keel is not the best way to treat your spouse with class and style, maybe... isn't it!?

Sorry Man, I don't want to sound derogative. Indeed, I am sad..

Ask yourself How Much you love her, and possibly quit yachting for a while. You can always catch back on yachting, hardly so on a relationship..

Best!
got to agree with you. Now if he was leaving her for an Oyster, then go for it; but a junkie Catalina? The man has not tastes.
__________________
reed1v is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 31-01-2016, 11:44   #30
Registered User
 
PlumKrazy's Avatar

Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Landlocked :(
Posts: 82
Re: Married but sailing alone

This really is something that concerns me. My wife wants to travel the world, but she seems to only want salt on her food. I haven't been able to figure out the best solution yet, but what I've read here gives me hope.
__________________

__________________
"Thanks for reading!" -PlumKrazy
( Also, please check out my latest book by clicking here. )
PlumKrazy is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
sail, sailing

Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Crew Available: Do you want to go sailing but not alone????? bobby whitley Crew Archives 10 18-03-2014 18:34
Has Anyone Ever Married Aboard ? anjou Off Topic Forum 73 29-02-2012 06:12
How Many Cruisers are Married ? SeaBungalow Families, Kids and Pets Afloat 182 22-01-2011 11:46
Married..., how should we get started? landlubberfornow Meets & Greets 22 22-01-2007 04:02



Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:13.


Google+
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

ShowCase vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.