SWMBO (
sweetly): "Ah, hello darling! Did you sleep well?" (
in the cockpit)
HWMO (
subdued): "Um, yes, fine, fine, I slept great..:" (
for about two minutes between mosquitos)
S: "Dear.....since you were so thoughtful and sensitive to point out all my shoes, I decided to make another shoe locker. It took me a while since I'm not a master craftsman like you, but I eventually figured it out, and learned a lot too."
H (
cringes): "Oh....er, how wonderful. What did you learn?"
S (
The picture of innocence): "Well, for instance, that narrow wrench you had wasn't much good. Much too flimsy. I saved you some bother, binned it already as it broke pretty quick as I was bolting the new locker in place."
H (
apprehensive): "Narrow wrench?"
S: "Sure, it had
funny little graduations on it. Tsk, the things those Chinese put on their junk..."
H (
slightly horrified): "Oh. That was a Vernier caliper."
S: "Ok, the Italians are making some crappy stuff too, these days. Never mind. But there was heaps more, I had a ball."
H: "Oh n....ahem, oh really? What like?" <gulp>
S: "Well, I had a little trouble getting the nails flush, but I found your nail punches and eventually got most of them flat."
H (
mystified): "Nail punches? I
lost the one I had last week, was going to buy one tomorrow. What did these "nail punches" look like?"
S: "Here, I saved the last one that didn't break...look.."
H (
winces): "Ah f.....forgetful me, those are.....um.....those were brad point drill bits."
S (
brightly): "Well, they were handy, though you really must stop
buying that cheap-shop junk! Just look at what they did to this inferior hammer..."
H: "Oh sh....er...oh sure, my copper hammer. Uh...anything else?"
S: "Just a little bit more. I'm looking forward to trying this again sometime you know, it was fun. Well, I couldn't get the last couple of nails flush with that last braid thingy, so I thought I'd just cut them smooth. This thing worked great, though I bet there are better ones you could buy for all the
money you spend on your tools."
H: "Arrgh, da.....dat's a plane, a smoothing plane..."
S: "Good name, it got them smooth, mostly. I got the rest of the surface flat with this handy little thing here...
H (
moans): "Awww....my cabinet scraper..."
S (
delighted): "Yes, I did do well for a
novice, didn't I dear? Scraped them all flat, though it did take a while; but it's
funny how absorbing woodwork is, isn't it?"
H: "Er...yes, very amusing, I agree...er...was that all?"
S: "Yes, that was it, for now. I was about to
head off to do a spot of
shopping, there's some bargains to be had and it's so much fun hunting them all out, don't you agree? You'd love to come, wouldn't you dear? Once I've found some nice shoes to put in the new cabinet, we might even have some time left to get that new summerdress I've been looking at, and maybe even pop by the
hardware for a couple of minutes on the way back. Coming, dear?"
H (
stoically):"Yes, dear...:"