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Old 06-05-2010, 09:28   #31
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Inside my Bubble

Its my boat and I am the skipper not the captain, we like it a little informal, Sherri is the X.O not the executive officer, Sherri is kisses and Hugs. She has very minimal/no sailing/boating experience and hates the idea of being seen as responsible for any decisions and feels that if the skipper makes decisions based on the "admiral's whims" and not the boats practical needs maybe its not always a good thing.

Oh yeah its her house and I am the yard boy!
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Old 06-05-2010, 09:37   #32
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Whats to know? The Admiral outranks the Captian,if the Admiral is unhappy the Captian knowes about it. Isn't anybody here married?
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Old 06-05-2010, 09:48   #33
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Isn't anybody here married?
I've opined many times in these forums that I find the term "captain" to be archaic, and that it doesn't apply at all to the way we run our boat. Since we have no captain, we certainly don't need an admiral.

Conversely, when a certain sister-in-law comes aboard, I call her "admiral" because of her habit of perching at the top of the companionway. This comes from an old naval saying that "the only two types of people who block companionways are admirals and a$$h*les." And I certainly don't want to refer to an in-law in the latter form.

(Apologies if I just broke a rule of some sort there. It was a literary reference.)
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Old 06-05-2010, 09:54   #34
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I agree with you, Mariness. I've always thought it was used a bit condescendingly - an award with no meaning, like a crown from Burger King.
Wow ! I've certainly never said it with that intention.

We're a team and while I may have dragged us into this mess we're definitely equal partners with mutual respect for our different skills.

Now I'll have to be careful and wonder how others may take it if I use the term again in the future



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Old 06-05-2010, 10:14   #35
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On our boat, we are equals. We learned to sail together, have about equal skills, are the same size and similar in strength. She is the Commadorable! I spend more time at the wheel so I am Wheelman. But those are infrequently used pet names. I always found Admiral and SWMBO kind of condescending also, similar to Little Lady.

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Old 06-05-2010, 10:33   #36
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Wow. I am so proud of this forum. Seriously.

We made it to page 3 in a thoughtful, reasoned, introspective manner on a sensitive subject which I think would educate anyone who read it on the variety of uses of the term.

I agree that tone is everything (tone either by context or actual voice tone) and what I was searching for is "what is the most common tone you have heard people use when they call someone Admiral" and that has really come through in these responses.

I also know that most of my understanding of Admiral comes from books, magazines, forums and cruisers blogs and less from being "out there".

I would like to propose that however it was used originally, because the term Admiral has been used primarily to describe women-in-straight-couples, that the term now is very similar to the way Americanadians use "the Wife" ...except on boats.

The way people use "the Wife" (as opposed to saying MY wife) runs the same gamut of meanings depending on the underlying relationships.

Sometimes it is a term of endearment, sometimes it is derogatory, completely dependent on the speaker and how they relate to the spouse.

For the people who are worried about using the term in the future or people lightening up about it - certainly there are people who are going to have knee-jerk reactions to any word but I would like to say that I, for one, react to the tone and context not the word. You could call me "the Admiral" in a way that will make me smile and joke with you, or in a way where I would have to open a can of whoop-ass

The difference for me is that the term Admiral seems to be used in a way that separates her from the boats daily work or dirty work and the term Wife doesn't separate her from the home's daily work or dirty work (although I'm sure we could fill another thread with pink and blue jobs - that's beyond the scope of this for me).

The second difference I see is a difference in "range of power" where on the boat the Admiral is in charge of big overarching decisions and not day-to-day issues (generally I think this is how the term is used even if there are exceptions) but off the boat there isn't this distinctions between overarching and day to day.

I know there are certainly exceptions (Admirals who change the oil or whatever) this is my read of the general trend for the term.
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Old 06-05-2010, 10:35   #37
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Congrats to the OP on the Praetorian, one of my favorites, great boats.
What boat owner doesn't like to hear THAT?!
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Old 06-05-2010, 10:57   #38
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We sometimes use the term with affection. I first heard it used when seeing how couples choose a boat to buy. Usually the Skipper does the legwork in scouting the possible boat purchases which are then reviewed by the wife--who as commander of the fleet will frequently make the final decision--hence the "Admiral".
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Old 06-05-2010, 10:57   #39
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Isn't anybody here married?
Good point. The understanding between husband and wife is the key here. I can say things to my wife (or call her things) that anyone else will get a slap in the face if they try it.

That's the key to this issue.
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Old 06-05-2010, 10:58   #40
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Honestly, I think it's much ado about nothing. Getting down to basics, if anything it lowers the male position but, once again, it's tongue-in-cheek.
Momma rules the roost. Ask any man (that's been married more than 5-10 years), and they'll tell you...
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Old 06-05-2010, 11:07   #41
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When I hear, or read the term of Admiral I think of YES DEAR! You can be real enthused about it, or find it a wee bit irritating. Depends on the situation, and relationship.......i2f
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Old 06-05-2010, 13:32   #42
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I now need to correct my original comment about Admiral not having any negative meaning

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Originally Posted by Livia View Post
I also know that most of my understanding of Admiral comes from books, magazines, forums and cruisers blogs and less from being "out there".
Not having been "out there" (on a boat ) on reflection that seems to also chime with my exposure to the term. Indeed in "real life" can't recall off hand hearing it being used. Nor, FWIW , have I heard anyone say ROTFLMAO, whether abbreviated or in full

Admiral = shorthand for have a wife who needs to be taken into consideration? (and add yer own sub text ).

But on the Captain front, my take is that on a pleasure yacht that is solely a role. not a rank And simply one of many roles required to be performed onboard.
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Old 06-05-2010, 13:40   #43
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there's truth to that observation!

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We sometimes use the term with affection. I first heard it used when seeing how couples choose a boat to buy. Usually the Skipper does the legwork in scouting the possible boat purchases which are then reviewed by the wife--who as commander of the fleet will frequently make the final decision--hence the "Admiral".
Admiral. n. The commanding officer who wields veto power over all potential additions to the fleet.
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Old 06-05-2010, 13:50   #44
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Well let the one that does most of the sailing and running of the boat be the captain and let the spouse who manages the money and provisions be the managing director.
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Old 12-05-2010, 08:34   #45
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Hmm. My Captain simply refuses to call me Admiral, I think perhaps he has a need to be perceived as the boss in front of the crew. Or maybe he just needs that secure feeling he gets with the crown title.

But he does absolutely everything else he's told, so I'm willing to make allowances and settle for the title of Chief Cook and Bottle washer (although I never do any washing either, but what's in a title....?)
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