Tips from the Galley

[GordMay]

Some Hints from the Galley:

1. To keep milk from turning sour, keep it in the cow.

2. If you are choking on an ice cube, don't panic. Simply pour a cup of boiling water down your throat and presto! The blockage will be almost instantly removed.

and for the men, in particular:

3. If at first you don't succeed, shouldn't you try doing it like your wife told you!

4. Clumsy? Avoid cutting yourself while slicing vegetables by getting someone else to hold them while you chop away.

5. Is it my imagination, or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?

Some “Bonus” Tips from Martha Stewart:

- Leaving half-sucked lollipops out for sweet ants is a quick and
easy way to add nutritional value to this already popular treat.

- A simple turkey baster can also be used to remove those pesky
beans lodged in your ear canal.

- In a pinch, frozen water can substitute for ice.

- Adding a dash of Drano to your liver and onions won't kill the
taste, but should numb your taste buds enough for you to swallow.

- Remember: Steak + Crest does *not* equal "steak tartare."

- Forget to pack the grill? No problem -- just spritz some olive
oil on your engine block and you'll be cooking in no time!

- Ground hamster adds a distinct tasty garnish to otherwise dull
mealtimes... no, it doesn't taste like chicken.

- For a real St. Patrick's day treat, leave the corned beef out on
the counter for a week beforehand. You not only get the taste of
corned beef, but it will be a festive shade of holiday green that
will accent your dinner table just right.

[Alan Wheeler]

Love it.