Top ten signs that you are too drunk
10. You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the Earth.
9. Mosquitoes catch a buzz after attacking you.
8. The back of your
head keeps getting hit by the
toilet seat.
7. Your idea of cutting back is less
salt.
6. You can focus better with one eye closed.
5. You fall off the floor.
4. You haven’t had a driver’s
license in such a long time that you have forgotten what one looks like.
3. Roseanne looks good.
2. You don’t recognize your wife/husband unless seen through bottom of glass.
1. You spent more time on the floor than you do standing up.
Dedicated to boatman61 and all other true persons of the sea!