Negativity on Sailing Your Own Boat (RANT)

[Mr B]

What is it with people that crawl out of the woodwork and from under rocks to actively put you down,
when you mention that you have bought a boat and intend to go sailing on it.

They have no idea on my skills or lack of it. Regarding boats or anything else.

They have no idea on my life experience as a person or what I have done in my life,

They say I cant do this, or I cant do that, It is too much for me, It is beyond my experience, knowledge, Capability, Expertise, Etc, Etc.
You must have years of experience before you can do that. or any thing like it.

I ask them what they do, I work, I go home, I watch Tee Vee,

How do you know what I can and cant do,

You dont know, So why do you persist in telling me what I can and cant do,
Mainly what I cant do,

What gives these people the right to dictate to me, or any one else for that matter, and castigate me and verbally insinuate that I am a complete novice or a crazy fool. for what I want to do,

I am getting to the point of severe Frustration, because it throws the fear of god into those around me,

Absolutely scares the crap out of some of them,

It almost broke up one very good relationship between one couple,

How do I put a stop to these moronic imbeciles and there Total Negativity,

My Mum used to say, If you cant say some thing nice, dont say any thing at all.

I try to be nice all the time, But I really need some input into this, as it is really getting on my Goat.

Your opinions would really help, as I can get another side to the story.

[ViribusUnitis]

Why do you care what they say?

What are they going to do? Stop you? Why do you care much if they think you can do it or not. Agree to disagree, and do it.

It needs to be like water off a ducks back.

[nv5l]

Don't think you'll get that here -- I've actually never gotten that, but I probably wouldn't pay attention anyway.

Perhaps you just need some new friends/acquaintances, or maybe a new bar...

[atoll]

about the only person i listen too is my wife,and thats only about 30% of the time,in the interestes of maintaining cordial relations............

[skipmac]

Well that's certainly a rant and might frustrate me as well, but to offer any help or consolation maybe some specifics?

Who are these naysayers: friends, family, dock bums, total strangers down at the local pub?

If friends then have a heart to heart talk with them, explain the trouble they're causing and ask them to lighten up. If they don't, get new friends.

If family, have the same talk. If they don't respond unfortunately you can't get new family but you can avoid the ones you have.

If dock bums and drunks at the bar, ignore them, avoid them, go to a new bar, and/or tell them it's none of their business. Why would you tell them about your life anyway? Maybe quit mentioning you have a boat to a bunch of strangers.

Then, who is it getting upset by the negativity? I assume your wife, kids or other sailing partner for your adventure. If yes, then first ditch the critics (see first part of my reply), second get your sailing partner(s) familiar with your boat and skills by gradually working up from short, close to home, very calm weather fun day sails to an overnight or weekend, again close to home and in calm weather. Pretty soon they will realize that going out on the water does not equate to instant death and in fact might even be fun.

[Me-and-Boo]

Offer to take 'em out - very far out (perhaps out of sight of land) - and then let them spout off.

[GordMay]

Originally Posted by Mr B

... What gives these people the right to ...

You do; if you listen to them.

[Matt sachs]

Follow your dreams. Thats what I do. I ask for advice, consider it and do what I think will work out best. "They" told me I couldn't build my own house. Wrong. "They" told me I didn't have what it takes to get a post-graduate degree. Wrong. "They" told me I shouldn't get married. I think 2 out of 3 ain't to bad.

[Unicorn Dreams]

Politely tell them that you are not interested in their uninformed opinion.
Then, if they don't understand that, reaise your voice and tell them to bugger off.
It's your life and your boat and do what YOU want, not what others want..

[zeehag]

seems others get jealous of what you are able to go out and do. i get it all the time... i cant sail alone..i am a woman...ROFL...
i own a formosa--i am gonna die at sea.....ROFL
too many lil silly nonsense statements can get you down, but dont let it get you to quit.
hell, i got to mazatlan, and plan on going to caribean.
you can do anything you set your mind to doing.
have fun.
live your adventure----remember, life is an adventure meant to be LIVED!!!!!

[Mr B]

Your all very helpfull, Thank you for your input.

Makes my task a lot easier seeing it from the other side,

I personally dont give a rats, It is water off a ducks back for me, My response is to push harder down with my foot on their necks, While head is submerged.

But it those around me that I care for, They are getting very upset over it,

I need ways to counter it on their behalf.

You have given me some very good idea's. Keep them coming.

And they are very carefull, they dont actually say anything to me.

My Previous and current Motorcycling life makes them very wary of what they say to me,
Hahahahahaha

[zeehag]

if it is family and loved ones , take em sailing. buy a spot tracking system so they can see where yer going--my mo0mma loves that--she knows where her baby is...LOL we are always mommas baby, ye know that....and send so many pix that they cannot stand it.
have em help with stuff--my brother helped me find a fan and flea kill for kat...he had a ball, according to his gf...LOL go figger.....

[Mr B]

Originally Posted by zeehag

seems others get jealous of what you are able to go out and do. i get it all the time... i cant sail alone..i am a woman...ROFL...
i own a formosa--i am gonna die at sea.....ROFL
too many lil silly nonsense statements can get you down, but dont let it get you to quit.
hell, i got to mazatlan, and plan on going to caribean.
you can do anything you set your mind to doing.
have fun.
live your adventure----remember, life is an adventure meant to be LIVED!!!!!

I get that all the time, The woman thing, from the women I know, I say, take me along with you, I wont say anything, I will be just there with you,
Amazing the difference a mans presence makes for a woman buying some thing,
The salesmen still address me, She's buying, So dont talk to me, I am only here to make sure you dont rip her off.
And they dont like it, Hahahahahaha

[Shrew]

what are you actually telling these folks, and whom are you telling? Are you telling your family and inlaws that you bought a boat and plan to cast off lines and sail around the world and never come back. Then of course, they're going to have reservations. Nobody wants to hear that their friends/family are planning on going far away and more than likely never coming back.

Are you a family of five living in a van and deciding to buy a boat in lieu of buying a more permanent residence or groceries? (I'm not saying that you are, so please don't take offense).

Essentially, what you're telling people and whom you are telling will garner a variety of responses. As said earlier, some see the adventure and are simply jealous.

Personally, I rarely mention that i boat to anyone other than family and very close friends, and even then I rarely talk about it. Non-boaters don't get it.

[Mr B]

Originally Posted by Matt sachs

Follow your dreams. Thats what I do. I ask for advice, consider it and do what I think will work out best. "They" told me I couldn't build my own house. Wrong. "They" told me I didn't have what it takes to get a post-graduate degree. Wrong. "They" told me I shouldn't get married. I think 2 out of 3 ain't to bad.

2 wives, 3 long time G/F's. 2 houses I built, I would never amount to nothing, Why even bother sending him to school,

Tradesman with degrees, Houses, Boats, cars, Bikes, Built and rode them all the time,
I just Followed my dream, They came, they left, all Negative,

Here I am, 63, Just bought a boat in Fiji, and will sail it home, with or with out help. I know I am competant to do it,
Still have my second house that I built, Has even got WOW factor,
Still have all my cars, My Honda Blackbird 1100XX, my little Catamaran,
I own the lot outright, Dont owe any one any thing,

My dream is finally coming to pass, Live on my boat and be financially secure in retirement, and still have all my toys,

Why, Because I didnt listen to any of them.But it was hard at times,