I think you'll develop a love for sailing as you already have for white water
. It'll take time to see it as home like the arenas you master now, but when you do, I believe sailing has so many powers, obvious and strong ones as well as the subtle feels you don't notice until it's part of you. I'm totally addicted to so many sides of it. Your seemingly lyrical attitude to kayaking resembles what sailing brings. A burning that gives peace of mind. A lack of boundaries that makes you want to share. Sailing is the plain and simple way of making a vessel move, but that is such a small part of it. This most likely is for you, even though the road to the previously mentioned sides of it is cobbled with troubles and discomfort. Your attitude works. That road will seem easy.
I'd like to elaborate the action side of sailing. It's not dangerous really. Of course it might be, but nowhere near as dangerous as other sports you do and I do. When I sail the F18 Wild Cat flying 20 knots plus, inches from the waves, spray all over, both guys on the trapezes and rudders shrieking, there is no feel of danger
or drama, because it's perfectly safe. I feel no need for sharks in a feeding frenzy. :-D The strong feeling of joy comes from pushing limits of ability, feeling the power tensioning all pieces of the boat like a bow where I'm the arrow, seing a beautiful scene and feeling the whole thing add up and work. Kind of like when a musical ensemble hear what they play joins to form a single
entity approaching perfection. Or like flying down a perfect virgin powder slope on the snowboard and feeling that the turns are perfectly balanced like a ballet dancer. I think that side of sailing is for you too.
But there is no doubt that cruising with your family
is where you should start, given the temptation you feel for that. I'm a firm believer in temptation as a good leader. Maybe it hasn't got me the power I would have if I used my abilities more ambitiously, but it has given me a fabulously good life and the ability to spread that to others. Temptation is much better than ambition, (but both can benefit from a hint of contemplation.)
Got to go to sleep now. Going to a seminar (sailing of course) all weekend. Getting up in 4 hours.