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Old 23-04-2011, 12:16   #1
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Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Here i sit , 40 years old and married with children ...and no boat. I was raised in Oklahoma and moved down to the Pensacola,FL area where i was introduced to sailing on friend(s) boats here in the bay.

I'm sure i'm not alone, but my wife has zero interest in a sailboat and faaar from open to the idea of a liveaboard.

Me and a childhood friend have a 10 year plan. Our children will be old enough to be their own adults and we both are tired of the mindless grind of work, and its not work ..we aren't lazy, but to wear out your mind and body till the end of my days does not sound fun to me. In 10 years , semi retire and be intercoastal sailors ...work here and there as things are needed. Needs and wants , wants and needs .../bonks himself on head

without this being a therapy session i just wanted to say i've enjoyed reading the forums here and see folks just like me who have dreams and idea's on how to pursue their passion (because thats what this is-PASSION)

thanks for having me along

Moonspray
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Old 23-04-2011, 12:26   #2
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Re: Hello from a middle-aged dreamer

Good luck with your plan, Moonspray! You can start small -- just a weekend cruiser you can take out a few times a month -- even a trailer-sailer. It does wonders for the soul, even little bits at a time, if that's all you can do. Start now and get the kids involved, too.

And by the way, what's this "middle-aged" business? Forty is young!
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Old 23-04-2011, 12:44   #3
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Erm, so what do the wives think of this plan...?
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Old 23-04-2011, 12:57   #4
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

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Erm, so what do the wives think of this plan...?
Being the sensitive guy that I am, I would have to inform the ladies that we're going to do this. Where else can she become an Admiral? Her feelings toward my chosen lifestyle are totally irreverent and invenereal. Women like being told what they're going to do because their decision making process is swayed by logic and not impulse.

I wonder if any of these feelings are why I'm all alone and miserable? If I could just find a woman that agrees with me................well, I know, it may be a long wait. Or I could be joking and displaying false bravado because she's not looking over my shoulder right now.
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Old 23-04-2011, 13:15   #5
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Here we have a classic example of why I will never get married again.
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Old 23-04-2011, 13:16   #6
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Oh, I forgot to say good luck!
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Old 23-04-2011, 13:20   #7
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

the women hmmm, mine thinks its a pie-in-the-sky dream that won't come to fruition, and not sure about my buddies. The biggest obstacle to hurdle is going to be the wives and to be honest i really don't know what to do about that.

Do i keep her happy and not do this, or do i just DO it? hehe , got 10 years to figure that one out.
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Old 23-04-2011, 13:28   #8
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Life is short.
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Old 23-04-2011, 14:19   #9
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

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Originally Posted by Moonspray View Post
the women hmmm, mine thinks its a pie-in-the-sky dream that won't come to fruition, and not sure about my buddies. The biggest obstacle to hurdle is going to be the wives and to be honest i really don't know what to do about that.

Do i keep her happy and not do this, or do i just DO it? hehe , got 10 years to figure that one out.
Try to get the kids involved and make it heaps of fun for them. Wifey will be impressed that you've become such a fine Dad. Eventually she may want to be part of the fun.

Greg
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Old 23-04-2011, 15:10   #10
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Hello from an Old Aged Dreamer.
I'm 72 and along with an old friend (73) we are going to TRY to get from Munroe MI to the Bahamas. I say try because when we left the dock the first time the forward gear in the tranny went 100' out. So we backed in to the dock, phoned Volvo for help and got the message they no longer support that model! After numerous unsuccessful attempts to locate a replacement, went home and wouldn't you know it I found one just down the road from home (Prince Edward Island). So in two weeks we begin phase 2.
So My young friend there is hope for you and your pal.
Like you I have a wife who not only will not get on a boat but will not even look at one, but darlin woman she is she said GO YOURSELF and have fun. This the daughter of a commercial fisherman and wife of a retired commercial fisherman.
Oh by the way this is our first sailing adventure.
Good luck
Jim
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Old 23-04-2011, 15:20   #11
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pirate Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

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Originally Posted by jnmbastarm View Post
Hello from an Old Aged Dreamer.
I'm 72 and along with an old friend (73) we are going to TRY to get from Munroe MI to the Bahamas. I say try because when we left the dock the first time the forward gear in the tranny went 100' out. So we backed in to the dock, phoned Volvo for help and got the message they no longer support that model! After numerous unsuccessful attempts to locate a replacement, went home and wouldn't you know it I found one just down the road from home (Prince Edward Island). So in two weeks we begin phase 2.
So My young friend there is hope for you and your pal.
Like you I have a wife who not only will not get on a boat but will not even look at one, but darlin woman she is she said GO YOURSELF and have fun. This the daughter of a commercial fisherman and wife of a retired commercial fisherman.
Oh by the way this is our first sailing adventure.
Good luck
Jim
Good onya Jim.............. if this guy (ex chief engineer marine) can do it in a 37ftr solo.... they're pretty much the same age... him n de boat.. 'Guiding Light' a 1936 Gauntlet 12 ton Cutter
I'm betting a coupla ex fishermen will do just fine...
Enjoy the adventure guys...
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Old 23-04-2011, 17:28   #12
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

G'Day Moonspray,

Hey, mon, you ain't middle aged!! Middle aged is someone 7 years older than I am
(73 for now)... you ain't even close!

But you are at a reasonable age to go sailing, so good luck to you, sir.

Cheers,

Jim
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Old 23-04-2011, 17:49   #13
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Moonspray

We too are dreamers. Still trying to dispose of our land lubbing posessions, purchase our boat and sail away.

I guess we are fortunate, my wife suggested the idea to me and the boys are 100% on-board with the idea. We could takeoff today were it not for real estate and lack of kitty funds.

Best of luck,
DJ
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Old 24-04-2011, 13:50   #14
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Welcome aboard and here’s some advice for you from someone who, being only in his late sixties has not yet reached middle age.
My advice is: Trade the wife in for whatever you can get for her, buy the best boat you can with the money you get and go sailing.
Let’s be serious here, what’s more important to you?
Some broad with a bad attitude or getting out there sailing?
See? The solution is easy when you ask yourself the right question…
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Old 24-04-2011, 18:05   #15
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Re: Hello from a Middle-Aged Dreamer

Welcome aboard! I am the wifely half of similar stated middle aged kerfuffle in my situation (see "nuts" thread in intros). I can empathize with ladies as this is a tough one. Plus we are conditioned (economically) for stuff-itis since we were little and believed in Santa Claus (particularly since we have generations that do not remember the great depression etc.)

As a suggestion from a very chicken female who has been confronted by her mate wanting to do sailing (liveaboard)...try incrementally introducing the wife to it. Take lessons together, charter together...that's what we plan to do... In the meantime, I needed to shed some of the stuff around the house anyways for spring cleaning, .....so just a tender step in the right direction....
Folks on this board are great for resourcing and info- ask away...in the meantime...good luck with the wife!
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