EX-boyfriend took my boat when i jumped ship

[mermaidserena]

The worst day of my life was watching my home sink into the muddy depths of Davey Jones. All for spite. I'm looking forward to starting over. I never thought I would be left boatless and mateless at the same time but I'm happier now than ever. I have to get a new boat and a new man! Relationships on board are the most interesting part of sailing. Can't wait to get back to lapping water a the draft of the sail! By Johnny you lost the best sailing mate and the hottest little galley wench you ever had all because you didn't know how to treat a lady. Next time try not to choke your girlfriend when you get drunk! How many sailors out there drink RUM, it's no excuse!

[slomotion]

Welcome and ... well:

All sailors drink rum. But, your boyfriend scuttled your boat? Sounds like a job for the State Attorney, a good civil lawyer, and maybe some really BIG friends. In the meantime, this is the way it's supposed to work:

Diary of a Mad Galley Wench

[Starbuck]

MMS,

For those of us where weren't there (which is everyone), this is very difficult to follow. It would be helpful if you assumed we don't know what in the world you're talking about, and laid out the basic details in some sort of coherent and logical manner.

Oh, and welcome.

[SkiprJohn]

Aloha Mermaid,

Anyone who sinks a boat out of spite should be strung up by the yard arm no matter what the circumstances. It wasn't the boat that did the person wrong.

Welcome aboard!! This is a good place to vent but details are necessary and you can get lots of advice and some sympathy from other sailors.

Kind Regards,

JohnL

[Charlie]

Welcome aboard:

Good to get rid of anyone who hits you. Hope you get a new boat soon. May your Ex steal more chain than he can swim with.

[David M]

Good grief!...he scuttled your boat?! I'm sorry to hear about your troubles. I definitely would set a day in court with this guy. There are always two sides to a story but there is no justification for choking someone and sinking their boat....it sounds like you have a case. Make sure the guy pays big time for his misdeeds.

The voyeur in me wants to know more details of what happened but the good guy in me says its none of my business.

Keep us posted.

David

[Pelagic]

While we can all sympathise with your hurt and anger, this has really nothing to do with sailing and for those with the curiosity for such private matters perhaps this is a better forum for you to use.

YouTube - Tricia Walsh Smith

Me? I just like to look at boats!

[CSY Man]

Next time try not to choke your girlfriend when you get drunk!

Huh, what is wrong with that...?

[mermaidserena]

Just an interesting tidbit of information that I thought was part of the interesting human drama of the sailing world. It is a rather interesting story to some, to others boring drama, then again if you have time to sit and read forums about sailing then sometimes I think a little human drama is interesting. Thank you for the welcomes!! Sailors are such interesting folk, in all my time on the boat I never thought I would end up in court with a sailor. We like to think we can settle things on the water! At least the live-aboards I have known are the vigilanty justice types! A few dead fish under a cushion or stolen clothes on the beach never hurt anyone! I am just so depressed about my home being under water I had to mention in a spiteful forum discussion, especially since I know he will be seeing it!
If anyone is interested I will be happy to give the details! Maybe I should do it in a diary It seems that some people get a little touchy about wasting the endless ocean of cyberspace discussion on something other than sailing (even if it involves the sinking of a sailboat) Yes my boat was scuttled! Total Bummer dude!

[mermaidserena]

DAVID M
Nobody knows anyone what is private business on the internet.. it dosen't exist!!
Thanks for the welcome. He did it with a hole saw!! Not very creative! Him and I both worked on the boat! We put equal sweat and tears into her! So the story went like this. We met at a local captain's dive and fell in love! Lived on the boat together, We'll just say he had issues with violence, that were unacceptable to me when they reared there ugly head so I decided to jump ship and stay on another boat close by while I fixed it up! One mourning I found a note spray painted on my dink (tender) that said "If we're over so is she" My heart sank as I floated up to the masthead of Avventura she was gone. Luckily I had moved all my stuff off the boat! The plan was to move back onto Avventura when my then boyfreind moved onto another boat!
So he's in the past but I'm lonely now after having such a close partnership with someone.
I think that the relationship you have with your first mate has everything to do with sailing. You need to depend on that person for everything all, social,emotional,physical psychological needs. You need to be able to trust that person with your life and to be capable of saving it. I decided that my ex had many good first mate qualities but I will fall in love with someone who has all those qualities and not the bad ones. Nobody is a perfect first mate, You just have to figure out which qualities and which annoyances a you have compatibility with!

[mermaidserena]

CHARLIE
I like the way you think!

[mermaidserena]

Originally Posted by slomotion

Welcome and ... well:

All sailors drink rum. But, your boyfriend scuttled your boat? Sounds like a job for the State Attorney, a good civil lawyer, and maybe some really BIG friends. In the meantime, this is the way it's supposed to work:

Diary of a Mad Galley Wench

That's a great diary! Much fun reading it! Your right I do need some really big friends! I'm really little so I need some balance!

[David M]

mermaid,
I wish you the best. As they say, there is more than one fish in the sea. One day you will land a keeper. It just takes time and patience and not letting bitter memories of the past affect your optimism about the future. You live and learn by your experiences and this bitter event in your life will make you all the wiser and even more likely to find what you ultimately want. Right now you are sad and hurt which will gradually turn to anger. When you can let go of that anger, you will be ready to continue on and be a better and wiser person for it.

David

[Wotname]

Originally Posted by mermaidserena

....I think that the relationship you have with your first mate has everything to do with sailing. You need to depend on that person for everything all, social,emotional,physical psychological needs. You need to be able to trust that person with your life and to be capable of saving it. .....

Can't help jumping in here with unsolicited advice (but hey its the internet and I am guy )
Try learning about / doing single handed sailing. Once mastered, all that other stuff about dependance on another sailor disappears and one can truly BE with another without NEEDING them.
Just another way that sailing is a great tool for learning about life (our OWN life that is). IMO.

[Wotname]

Or get a bigger hole saw....