What Is with the Rudeness at CF ?

[NotQuiteLost]

Originally Posted by Ocean Girl

Even more amazing, the person who you think is completely incapable will also go on, some will defy your righteous judgment and do just what they were pondering to do, and some will fade away, all without your post.

I have a friend that never sailed more than a few hours. He decided one day to buy a boat and sail away (singlehand). He bought a 53ft steel hull and left, all within 6 months of first conceiving the idea. He learned as he went. People said he was crazy, said he wouldn't make outta the harbor. He ignored them and is now in the pacific having a blast. Which side do you want to be on? the folks that tried to help him figure it out along the way or the folks that stood by and did nothing but criticize? The naysayer’s are long forgotten while the encouragers are friends.

This resonates with me. Great post, Erika.

The thing many of us forget is, regardless of how much we've learned, we're still a long ways from having it 'all' figured out. Nobody ever does get it all. Everyone starts at a different point, some of us went out with friends for a weekend sail around the harbor, others grew up on power boats and dreamed of no more fuel bills and longer passages. Some of us did the RV thing until we realized we were more interested in destinations where the people spoke languages other than our own and the climate was a bit warmer.

It really is a tough balancing act, commenting on/to new sailors about what is the best way to get into it. Some people want to take lessons, get licenses and have other people tell them they're ready for it before having the confidence to go out and deal with the rigors of this lifestyle. Others want the challenge of figuring it out for themselves, and need more general direction guidance, instead of step-by-step instructions.

I never even knew what it was to 'heave to' until I was in a spat of 30-40knots and my autopilot stopped working. And I'd been sailing for quite a few years off and on! I had to look at the sails, rigging and lines, and think about it for a few minutes. I figured it out, and then I was hove to with a nice, comfortable ride for a few days to take the autopilot motor off and do the maintenance it needed.

Still, the caution we hear from some of the grumpier types in this, or any other sailing community is well-founded and even well-intended. Nobody wants to see people get into something they're truly not ready for, especially when that something has been a source of peace and joy for the people giving the advice.

[Springbok]

Strange that when someone tells it as it is , from actual experiences one is called negative. It is hard to be a realist today in our liberal fence -sitting W World. If one has any other point of view, one is negative ,whilst to a realist, the positve views of many are pretty negative
Telling it as it is, is often seen as rude. CF actually only becomes rude when changed to FC
Clyde

[SurferShane]

Originally Posted by Springbok

Telling it as it is, is often seen as rude. CF actually only becomes rude when changed to FC
Clyde

Yeah, look as a lawyer I conceive my role in life as to protect the innocent (mostly) from unjust legislation and political correctness. Loosely speaking in a “liberal” society (talking philosophy not politics!) as long as you don’t harm others what is morally and/or legally right or wrong is really not the issue? No wonder I am currently unemployed?

My big gripe though is still people not answering the original bloody question!

Even at law school I had to conform too certain standards and one of the first things you learn is to read the question, look at the facts and apply the law (or what little knowledge you might have known thereof). At least if you somehow attempted to answer the question even if you were absolutely “wrong” there was still a good chance you would mention enough stuff up the right dark alley to score you a pass. Start raving on with the first thing that popped into your head and you might as well have called it game over.

Now I can accept that like this thread by page 25 some people might start wandering off on a tangent either looking for those esoteric points that might score them perfect marks or even raving crap to fill the word count. Still, I really do think it is polite practice to read and maybe even seriously attempt to answer the original question instead of interrupting with personal conversations and totally unrelated trivia?

Wow, maybe I have a future as a grumpy old academic?

[Wotname]

Originally Posted by Ocean Girl

I have noticed a trend of rudeness at cf, it started with the thread with the young couple wanting to sail RTW and it still persist. I stopped reading for a while cause it just seemed a bit of a downer. I always thought of CF as a place to get help and input and yes encouragement. Cruising for many is a lifelong dream, and the amount of static the outter world gives us dreamers is plenty, we don't need any of that crap here. This rudness is not to the level of say sailnet, but it doesn't seem to be going away either.
What do you think? is this just a phase?

Originally Posted by SurferShane

Yeah, look as a lawyer I conceive my role in life as to protect the innocent (mostly) from unjust legislation and political correctness. Loosely speaking in a “liberal” society (talking philosophy not politics!) as long as you don’t harm others what is morally and/or legally right or wrong is really not the issue? No wonder I am currently unemployed?

My big gripe though is still people not answering the original bloody question!

Even at law school I had to conform too certain standards and one of the first things you learn is to read the question, look at the facts and apply the law (or what little knowledge you might have known thereof). At least if you somehow attempted to answer the question even if you were absolutely “wrong” there was still a good chance you would mention enough stuff up the right dark alley to score you a pass. Start raving on with the first thing that popped into your head and you might as well have called it game over.

Now I can accept that like this thread by page 25 some people might start wandering off on a tangent either looking for those esoteric points that might score them perfect marks or even raving crap to fill the word count. Still, I really do think it is polite practice to read and maybe even seriously attempt to answer the original question instead of interrupting with personal conversations and totally unrelated trivia?

Wow, maybe I have a future as a grumpy old academic?

Mate, the reason you are unemployed is simple: You haven't answered the OP question.

Yeah, I know I am interrupting, throwing in some more trivia and a personal conversation but I am claiming page 25 privileges

[Pblais]

My big gripe though is still people not answering the original bloody question!

If you submit a claim we will happily give you your money back.

[GordMay]

Originally Posted by Ocean Girl

... What do you think? is this just a phase?

If your premise that “this” is rudeness, is wrong (as I believe), the question would be moot.
IMHO: this behaviour (whatever you choose to call it) isn’t just a phase.

[Chief Engineer]

There are many threads I have perused......once they get into my **** is bigger and better than yours......I stop reading.

Or if there is a personal diatribe/libel/slander.....out the door I go.

I come here to have fun and enlighten myself..........

It is a nice port in a storm after a days work

[Bash]

Originally Posted by s/v Beth

Boatman, I burst out laughing when I saw your post. You made my day. And Galileo was a scientist who was killed for his observations and math. ( i believe) No burning at the stake here.

Proof positive that even moderators make mistakes.

On January 8, 1642, at the age of 77, Galileo died of natural causes after having been diagnosed with fever and heart palpitations.

[Bash]

Originally Posted by SurferShane

Wow, maybe I have a future as a grumpy old academic?

trust me, being a grumpy old academic isn't as easy as it looks.

[SurferShane]

Originally Posted by Wotname

Mate, the reason you are unemployed is simple: You haven't answered the OP question.

Na – the real reason I am unemployed is that I am really over people. Generally the horrible individuals who piss me off, whether they think they are absolute geniuses or hardcore working class Novocastrians, are those so institutionalised they won’t let me fulfil my dreams. As such, I am always looking for excuses not to work knowing if I do all these ogres will do is crush my heart. Instead I prefer to spend my time either surfing or sailing finding this much more agreeable to my mental health than being treated like ****.

Maybe to piss my detractors off I could go out of my way to fulfil two viable options. The first to return to decent and dignified employment representing alleged murders and rapist or even “chasing ambulances” and the second to sail off into the sunset? Now I have spoken these options I am sure some wicked person if not many will go out of their ways to block my plans; story of my life! Hey – and you can be sure that I am no rich kid whose parents pampered him through law school, so if you come around to do it in person be warned I grew up on the wrong side of town.

Now about those dreams and as originally posted “using CF as a place to get help and input and yes encouragement”. God it annoys me when people post a simple question and instead of others reading it and even making an attempt to answer they just interrupt with personal conversations and totally unrelated trivia.

Sorry I currently have no sense of humour, but due the above circumstances I am about to have another of my antisocial episodes and should probably really take my GP’s advice and take a few months off and go sailing!

[SurferShane]

Originally Posted by Pblais

If you submit a claim we will happily give you your money back.

Opps – I had an even “better” reply to this one, but seeming in the interim a few kind individuals posted some near positive answers I might leave Dr Jekyll in the closet for now!

[flysci]

Whoa! You really are grumpy. Please don't take out your frustration on us. Unless it's how to get your #2 option going! Move onto a boat. Anchor out on the weekends. Find a kind of law to practice that doesn't feel slimy to you, there are lots. Then come back as your nice and helpful real self.

Margo

[zeehag]

most of the time, the only cause of plans not progressing is personal input.
our worst enemy is within the self.
pogo had it right--"we have met the enemy and he is us"
why not try to ignore others-- pretend they dont exist--isnt anyone else making your plans be not effected--is only to within ones own self. find peace and sail and have a good life.
dr barry stevens wrote a goo dbook-only one book--was titled "dont push the river, it flows by itself" is a book on gestalt psychology. goood book.

[osirissail]

Maybe some anger management classes or Proziac is needed to mellow out. Getting away to the mountains or a deserted island on a boat are some good substitutes. But don't set off cruising the world if you cannot "roll with the punches" or let the BS roll off your back like water on a duck. You will be encountering some of the world's dumbest and obstinate/obnoxious government officials working in Customs/Immigration offices occasionally. It is not everywhere, but in enough places to be a factor. You need to be able to smile, ka-tow, and complement their country even when you really would prefer nuking the place.
- - But after such an encounter some sun-downers, a great sunset and fine friends makes the pain go away so you can press on enjoying your life afloat.

[s/v Beth]

Just as Galileo was forced to recant, it looks like so do I- he was judged and imprisoned by the inquisition, not killed. My point was we do not have martyrs here, just sailors trying to get along.
I think a debate about something can be quite lively and the members of the debate can be very civilized. Just takes effort.