What Is with the Rudeness at CF ?

[Hud3]

I can't comment on how SA treated them, but I was really disappointed in the reception that they got here.

There were a handful of members who made borderline rude posts in their introductory thread. I think the thing that bothered me most about it was the lack of respect for a new member with a different style. That small group of members came across to me as somehow thinking that they were the arbiters of what's appropriate in posting here and in linked sailing blogs.

Having opinions is fine, but expressing them in the way that they were thrown out in that thread was inappropriate to me. I couldn't help but wonder if those who made those posts would say the same things if they met such a couple face to face as prospective members at their sailing club. Certainly not, I'm sure.

[MarkJ]

Originally Posted by Minggat

If I could be on my boat now, I wouldn't be here now.

I thought so too!!!

Then I got on the boat.

Damned if I don't need it more now that when I was ashore! Not only for problem resolution and information but for the fun and comaradarie...

In fact I dunno how anyone could survive on a boat without it... unless they were a combined shipwrite, plumber, electrican, rigger, cook and washerwoman...


Mark

[DeepFrz]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

In fact I dunno how anyone could survive on a boat without it... unless they were a combined shipwrite, plumber, electrican, rigger, cook and washerwoman...
Mark

Oh, you mean like Nicolle?

[Ocean Girl]

Originally Posted by Patient

I noticed it too recently.

Its not the heated arguments that are the problem as that comes with the territory of any internet forum, but rather the condescending and ridiculing demeanor regarding even the most random of topics.

There is a huge difference between someone disagreeing with your opinion passionately up front and someone whose entire purpose is to ridicule your ideas with sarcasm.

The "Whale bottom paint" thread is a great example. Someone asks a legitimate question based on curosity and in the sea of sarcasm that follows, of course, never surfaces their head again on this forum and most likely never will in the future. Who would after reading that?

Everyone likes to laugh once in a while and have a bit of fun, I count myself in that category. However, when it is at the expense of someones trust and inherent vulnerability that comes here to ask a question, it has completely crossed the line in my book. Its shameful and speaks very poorly of the community this forum is supposed to represent.

Yes, this is what I was picking up too, though it wasn't the whale thread that spured me to start a post. The replies to this thread only cement my basic belief that this is a great community and well worth the occasional self inspection to keep it that way. A round of Shirley Temples for all, drinks are on me!
Cheers,
Erika

PS
Monos rule

pump it don't dump it

whales like black bottom paint, absolutely LOVE blue paint, red just makes em mad.

Mansons are better than ronca...

[Auspicious]

Originally Posted by Ocean Girl

Mansons are better than ronca...

What's a ronca?

[Janice]

There are many times I have typed a rude response, and then erased before posting. It helps to clears the frustration

[Randyonr3]

I find it hard NOT to be rude at times........
You get someone thats asking a serious question about a system or a boat from
EXPERANCED cruisers and you get replies from those that not only dont own a boat but have NEVER been cruising...
I personally have gotton to the point where I avoid the forum all together and are about to close it for good as I can ask a question,
" something like the additional power the freezer is using when filling it with stores"
and I'll get replies back from people telling me to get rid of the freezer, I dont need it and by the way, I cant go cruising in a boat like I have as the Keel will fall off.
And its all comming from someone who spends more time with their nose in a book and less time on the water..
We're pulling out over the next few days for places unknown so You wont see my rudeness,,, for awhile anyway.........

[sww914]

Originally Posted by WillJacocks

Where can I get some of that!?! I am tired of soft drinks with hfcs (high fructose corn syrup) I quit drinking that crap a few months ago, even though I still get a can or cup now and then. (maybe 1 a week) I have lost 15 pounds just drinking water or lightly sweetened tea. (unsweetened if it tastes good enough). I do like coke, but the hfcs was just too much.

Costco and most Mexican markets.
I don't know if you have any Mexican markets in La, if you need some we have quite a few in Ca, maybe you can borrow one until you get your own.

[Zednotzee]

Originally Posted by mintyspilot

There is a saying that "there is no such thing as bad advertising" and this case seems to prove that rule.

That's what Ashley MacIsaac thought. Didn't work out in his case.
Ashley MacIsaac - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Originally Posted by Randyonr3

...I'll get replies back from people telling me to get rid of the freezer, I dont need it and by the way, I cant go cruising in a boat like I have as the Keel will fall off.
And its all comming from someone who spends more time with their nose in a book and less time on the water..
We're pulling out over the next few days for places unknown so You wont see my rudeness,,, for awhile anyway.........

LOL!

Well, have a nice trip. We hope to hear from you when you return (assuming your keel doesn't fall off), & we'll welcome you with open arms (even though it was terribly rude of you to leave us in the first place).

[Janice]

Originally Posted by Randyonr3

I find it hard NOT to be rude at times........
You get someone thats asking a serious question about a system or a boat from
EXPERANCED cruisers and you get replies from those that not only dont own a boat but have NEVER been cruising...
I personally have gotton to the point where I avoid the forum all together and are about to close it for good as I can ask a question,
" something like the additional power the freezer is using when filling it with stores"
and I'll get replies back from people telling me to get rid of the freezer, I dont need it and by the way, I cant go cruising in a boat like I have as the Keel will fall off.
And its all comming from someone who spends more time with their nose in a book and less time on the water..
We're pulling out over the next few days for places unknown so You wont see my rudeness,,, for awhile anyway.........

OMG you read my mind

[Stillraining]

Originally Posted by Randyonr3

I find it hard NOT to be rude at times........
You get someone thats asking a serious question about a system or a boat from
EXPERANCED cruisers and you get replies from those that not only dont own a boat but have NEVER been cruising...
I personally have gotton to the point where I avoid the forum all together and are about to close it for good as I can ask a question,
" something like the additional power the freezer is using when filling it with stores"
and I'll get replies back from people telling me to get rid of the freezer, I dont need it and by the way, I cant go cruising in a boat like I have as the Keel will fall off.
And its all comming from someone who spends more time with their nose in a book and less time on the water..
We're pulling out over the next few days for places unknown so You wont see my rudeness,,, for awhile anyway.........

"Your gonna shoot your eye out kid!.. ( Christmas Story...great flick )

Hope you don't close the book on us forever Randy...Iv enjoyed having you here.

I left one forum for almost a year...Then the dardest thing happened...The band of culprits creating that decision all left....Im back and enjoying it once again.

The ignore function only works so-so as anyone who quotes anyone on your ignore list ends up there for you to read anyway.

I left CF for a couple months right at the get go as I got dinged one to many times IMO for posting my kind of hummer ...usually accompanied with a photo) and then one strike against me when I made a public stink about it...I have since seen many similar and here again IMO worse posts but I digress.

If I sense RG's drift it is not the hummer or the occasional ribbing...It's how it is dished out.

Its one thing to offer a joke hinting to your opinion and then follow it up with some useful insight or information to the question... and something all together different to lambaste someone as idiotic for even thinking such a thing.

Like Randy I get tired of the Go simple, get rid of everything mantra...but Iv been around enough to where I know the mentality types now on both sides of the argument and realize that for them its the right decision...for me it is not...same with keels, wide beams, sloops, ketches, cats, and monos.

Guys and Guys...I'm still working on...

Edit: One other thing is I always use the emoticon things....some of you don't , and it is hard to know if your joking or not...so if you aren't I suggest giving them a try so we all know...

[Auspicious]

Originally Posted by Randyonr3

And its all comming from someone who spends more time with their nose in a book and less time on the water..

Would like to share lists of those who are only cut and paste sailors?

[sabray]

I think the cf moderators do a great job balancing rude, reaction and digital posting. In the case of I'm 20 something and sailing. My gut reaction is the title could gave been were fixing up our hallber rassey and sailing. Because that was not the presentation things went differently.I thought the response was inapropriate and judgmental. I wonder though had the initial introduction been worded differently would the response have been so tough. I started a thread I regret. My younger women and I ..... The point was supposed to be that it's irrelevant. It took an akward turn. I could have been more serious and stated couple in there 40s sails with kids. Or 20 days in the Chesapeake.I started the thing with that in mind and then it went down hill. Not sure it was rude but Tao I think called it snarkey. But I think mo more snarkey then starting a thread with I'm female and x old look at what I do.
I hope cf as it has in the past let's challenging conversations continue. I dint think that's rude. I like a little controversy it often times makes me seek more information.
Remembering rude the way Simpson was treated here was astonishiing.Simpson lost his rudder midway to hawai. Many tried to provide suggestions and then there was a trashing. What about buimfuzzle? Intersting is that all these had a self promoting nature. So it's okay to be rude if it's with self promoters; amateurs Or if the thread title catches us the wrong way

[s/v Beth]

I ignore boorish people- but sometimes they do keep me from posting. I think are greatest resource is each other and learning from each other. I will keep posting even though I get "You dummy you should have done A and B first" in the thread. I appreciate people that give positive thoughts for improvement. I think its an art form and the epitome of tact.

[Bash]

Months ago, in one of the back rooms where the advisers hang out, I’d proposed that we have a “staff meeting” for mods and advisers from the San Francisco area. My thought was that several of us might raft up in some remote anchorage and actually get to know each other face to face.

As happens with many good ideas, things quickly got out of hand. A nameless moderator from Yemen was going to be in the USA on business, and another ex-pat moderator was planning to come to California to visit family, and before we knew it, CF staff were coming here from such far-ranging ports of call as Sydney, Lebanon, and Singapore, not to mention the exotic seaport of Baltimore.

The first evening we got together at Sarafina’s house for pink daiquiris and a dinner that must have taken three days to put together. We were somewhat quiet for the first few minutes, and I could almost hear the unspoken thoughts saying, “What? You’re Bash? You don’t appear at all how I conceived Bash to look!” But within a short time we discovered not only how much we had in common, but how much history we shared as members of this forum. We also discovered that the group’s collective wit was formidable.

The following day a dozen of us got together on my boat for a daysail in nearly perfect conditions. This is where our commonality really came out. What a passion for the water the group has! If you’d have joined us without knowing the details of our coming together, you’d have thought we’d been crewing together for years. I’m happy to report that your moderators are not armchair cruisers--these people really know their way around a sailboat. It was like having a crew of marine surveyors aboard.

It was interesting for me, the only non-moderator aboard, to hear the mods talk about their work and the challenges they face when guiding this forum. It was readily apparent that they care deeply about providing a community experience for members. Clearly, there is greater satisfaction among the mods if they are able to bring a troublesome member along to be a positive contributor, rather than just cutting that member adrift. These people care!

When I dropped the crew off for the ferry ride back to San Francisco, my boat was flying one of the new CF burgees from the starboard spreader, complements of moderator extraordinaire Tao Jones. I fly it with great pride, having experienced first hand the people who struggle to enforce the be-nice rule, and having discovered their absolute humanity.