You are inspiring me. Let me say I know it is not simple. I come from a long line of diabetics and heart patients on one side of my family
, and while I know some of that was what they ate, some of it was genetic. Some of the heart issues were congenital.
I know for some it seems like a no-brainer, just a mathematical equation. These people are not wired to crave food
or they have a diet that does not expose them to chemicals and preservatives in their food that set them up for addiction to that food.
I was raised with someone in my family
who used food as a salve for anxiety. I watched everyday as a bag of some kind of chip was downed all on his own to deal with his pain and fear. Not a good example when you are a five year old. It makes me sad just to write this thinking about him.
I know fast food is laced with chemicals that I really believe set us up for wanting more of the junk. I never was a big fast food person but of late when we are traveling to and from our boat and I don't have time to pack something we find ourselves in the clutches of those evil empires of the fried domain. I try to make healthy choices but even the so-called healthy choices at these places are not good.
I was a sailor and rower in college. I ran at least four times a week. I was a fit 140 at 5' 10'' - I am not now. I reached my all time high weight ten years ago and then joined e-diets when they first started. In six months I had lost
forty lbs. and was feeling and looking good. I maintained this for a year and a half but then it crept up again.
About six months after it crept up again I got very sick with tick borne illness that went undiagnosed for six months. Nothing I ate stayed with me, I was constantly nauseous and was lucky if one meal a day would stay down...lost fifty lbs. in six months. That was actually scary and I swore to myself that I would never complain about my weight again if I could just be well again.
Well, flash forward five years from then and I am complaining about my weight again. I had to drastically change my diet for three years while being treated. Nothing but water
and herbal tea. No added sugar, no junk, no chocolate...etc...
I could barely walk up the stairs, had no energy, so there was no exercise. Now that I am back, I am having to start exercising from scratch. It is not fun. I didn't realize how competitive I was with myself. I would get on my rowing machine and pull like a banchie. I was strong, and it enabled me to relate to my less than petite physique from a place of power. I had always wanted to be cute and small, well that was not the body I was given. I think I was born 5'10" ;0) Anyway, it was not until college that I really found the sport I was good at, and started to love my body for how powerful and strong it was.
So now, after a chronic illness to get on my ergometer (rowing machine) and not be able to feel this power my body once had is downright frustrating and makes me sad. I have stopped exercising regularly. I know I should be grateful I can even still row, and I know others that have much bigger challenges physically, but it is my reality and at times, yes, I feel sorry for myself.
I am a licensed massage therapist and bodyworker. The lessons I have learned about how the spirit and body work together have been amazing. Seeing clients I have and their challenges in regards to relating to their bodies are illuminating and amazing. For many people fighting weight is not a simple equation. When humans have trauma in their lives from accidents, emotional/physical abuse, addictions, and life circumstance it can manifest in such a way that food, which is our sustenance and survival, gets wrapped up with the emotional realm. It can get very confusing and it is no longer just simply eating, but it can be medicating.
Sorry to ramble Kate. I just want you to know that I wish you luck with the weight loss. I would love to commit to losing with you, but right now as my Life is changing rapidly and we are getting ready to sell it all and go cruising, I am not sure I am strong enough to work on giving up coffee, red wine, and creamer in my coffee ;0) I am banking on the long passages diet that others have referred to here.
I will tell you that as I pack up our house and get it ready for the market I tried motivating myself with M&Ms this weekend. That was not a good plan at all. I felt horrible after eating them, sluggish, my blood sugar was affected...it was not a good scene.
The next day while feverishly working around the house I decided to reward myself with good music
and playing cards during my breaks - I felt a whole lot more motivated, sharp minded, and I was more productive.
I vote for ditching the toffee popcorn and getting a massage once a month each time you are closer to your goal. Massage is an awesome reward. It will help you be more mindful, relaxed, and in-tune with your body. I actually wrote a paper on research
they have done with recovering alcoholics and massage and how it literally helped them with detox from a biochemical level.
Take care Kate!