Cruisers Forum
 


Join CruisersForum Today

Reply
 
Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 04-12-2012, 22:29   #46
Registered User
 
Doodles's Avatar

Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Virginia, USA & Krabi, Thailand
Boat: Wauquiez Pretorien 35; Nordica 16
Posts: 2,810
Images: 1
Quote:
Originally Posted by rebel heart View Post

Sorry man.

You can't ever be ready for your dad dying.
Amen. Sorry for your loss Telli. Lost mine 1/1/11.
__________________

__________________
Mundis Ex Igne Factus Est
Doodles is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2012, 22:32   #47
Registered User
 
Celestialsailor's Avatar

Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: In Mexico, working on the boat
Boat: Hallberg Rassy 35. and 14ft.Whitehall pulling skiff.
Posts: 8,013
Images: 5
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tellie View Post
My father died this morning at 0226 at home in hospice care. He worked hard all his life to give me a better opportunity to live and enjoy my life to a fuller extent. He never regretted it at all. I was blessed with a father whose personal dreams took a back seat to mine. I pray for two things, one that I will always take full advantage of what he gave me and two that my daughter will feel somewhat the same when my time finally comes. Dad, thank you for all you've given me and rest in peace
Peace be yours
__________________

__________________
"Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming: Wow - what a ride!"

http://wwwjolielle.blogspot.com/
Celestialsailor is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2012, 22:48   #48
Registered User
 
avb3's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Florida/Alberta
Boat: Lippincott 30
Posts: 9,913
Images: 1
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tellie View Post
My father died this morning at 0226 at home in hospice care. He worked hard all his life to give me a better opportunity to live and enjoy my life to a fuller extent. He never regretted it at all. I was blessed with a father whose personal dreams took a back seat to mine. I pray for two things, one that I will always take full advantage of what he gave me and two that my daughter will feel somewhat the same when my time finally comes. Dad, thank you for all you've given me and rest in peace
RIP, Tellie. Those of us who have lost a parent understand.

When my mother passed away, I realized that now I am the older generation. Until that time, no matter what, one could always ask for advice, or discuss a situation. Now my kids, kid-in-laws and grandkids give me that honor.
__________________
If your attitude resembles the south end of a bull heading north, it's time to turn around.
avb3 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 00:00   #49
Registered User

Join Date: Jun 2010
Posts: 393
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

You don't really know what alone means till your parents pass on.
__________________
olaf hart is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 00:29   #50
Registered User
 
Doodles's Avatar

Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Virginia, USA & Krabi, Thailand
Boat: Wauquiez Pretorien 35; Nordica 16
Posts: 2,810
Images: 1
Quote:
Originally Posted by Kenomac View Post
Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely
in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally used up and worn out, shouting...…man, what a ride!’ George Carlin

No regrets.
Actually, that quote was by Hunter S. Thompson.
__________________
Mundis Ex Igne Factus Est
Doodles is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 05:43   #51
Registered User

Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Deale, MD
Boat: Westsail 28
Posts: 684
Images: 12
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

While Ive never been confronted with the specter of certain death, five years ago, I found myself laying on a Wash DC sidewalk desperately trying to reduce the gush of blood flowing from a stab wound to my my liver, down to a reasonable flow. Almost immediately I began to drift in and out of consciousness and began to feel fluish due to loss of blood. For a long while, I could hear no ambulance sirens that would have indicated a possible rescue and after considering the huge puddle of blood running down the sidewalk and into the gutter, considered myself as good as dead.

My first thought after being stabbed was "how embarrassing, Ive crapped my pants!"

Following that, my thoughts at the time were not the result of careful, well considered, death bed musings, so aren't directly comparable to those in the book, but they were life changing to me.

Did I have regrets? Yes. I thought of my elementary school age kids and regretted that I had put off spending time with them so often. I regretted the manner of my death and the effect on my legacy. I regretted not having saved enough for my kids schooling.

I also had a sense of rage and disappointment that I wasn't finished living yet, and was keenly aware of what a selfish bastard I'd been.

Did my epiphany cause me to change my ways? I guess to find out you'll have to read MY book when it comes out. ;-P (which will be never.)
__________________
virginia boy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 06:10   #52
Senior Cruiser
 
Blue Stocking's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: St. Georges, Bda
Boat: Rhodes Reliant 41ft
Posts: 4,117
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

I have said to my friends, ad nauseum, that I want my epitaph to be "It seemed like a good idea at the time"
__________________
so many projects--so little time !!
Blue Stocking is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 06:29   #53
Registered User
 
mbianka's Avatar

Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 2,125
Images: 1
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blue Stocking View Post
I have said to my friends, ad nauseum, that I want my epitaph to be "It seemed like a good idea at the time"
Better than one that says his last words were: "Hey, watch this!"
__________________
Capt. Mike
mbianka is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 06:50   #54
Registered User
 
Blue Crab's Avatar

Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Hurricane Highway
Boat: Cal 29
Posts: 3,883
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blue Stocking View Post
I have said to my friends, ad nauseum, that I want my epitaph to be "It seemed like a good idea at the time"
Yep. I'd second that. I'm surprised that most have no regrets. Do you all have no roads not taken, decisions that turned out poorly, jobs turned down, words not spoken, people dropped behind? I sure do.
__________________
Blue Crab is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 07:22   #55
Registered User
 
mbianka's Avatar

Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 2,125
Images: 1
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blue Crab View Post
Yep. I'd second that. I'm surprised that most have no regrets. Do you all have no roads not taken, decisions that turned out poorly, jobs turned down, words not spoken, people dropped behind? I sure do.
Well there are certainly things I'd still like to do but, I don't consider them bucket list items. Though there are certain things that I thought I'd wanted to do when I was younger that don't appeal to me now. As for regrets I think it is more like relief that I did not follow certain paths in my younger years. Most involve women I was "enamored" of when I was younger. I don't think my life would have been as enjoyable had I traveled down some of those paths. Though I did take some chances in a job change that ultimately led me be in a place I never thought I be in my mid forties that was very positive. Though early on I was already pretty content with life as my high school classmates voted me happiest in my senior year and that continues in my life now.
These days I let serendipity often led the way and am often pleasantly surprised.
__________________
Capt. Mike
mbianka is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 07:23   #56
Long Range Cruiser
 
MarkJ's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Australian living on "Sea Life" currently in England.
Boat: Beneteau 393 "Sea Life"
Posts: 12,828
Images: 25
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Hi Tellie,

Sorry to hear the bad news. It's sad as we get older the things we thought would always be there either cease, or stop being our pillar of strength.


All the best.


Mark
__________________
Notes on a Circumnavigation.
OurLifeAtSea.com

Somalia Pirates and our Convoy
MarkJ is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 07:24   #57
Registered User
 
Mike OReilly's Avatar

Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: Good question
Boat: Rafiki 37
Posts: 4,034
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blue Crab View Post
Yep. I'd second that. I'm surprised that most have no regrets. Do you all have no roads not taken, decisions that turned out poorly, jobs turned down, words not spoken, people dropped behind? I sure do.
As I said, it's due to our propensity for self-delusion. It's no surprise most people here place their own situation as "without regret." This is exactly the kind of answers current cognitive research says you'd get.

The research shows we -- humans -- almost always rank our personal choices, experiences and outcomes as higher, better or preferable than other people. It's who we are (as a species).

I'm not saying this is bad, or good. It just is. ANd it explains why few of us will go to our death beds with great regrets. Be comforted that, whatever your choices in life, you'll likely believe you are (were) right.

P.S. My heart goes out to you Tellie. I lost my father 25 years ago, and it still hurts.
__________________
Why go fast, when you can go slow.
BLOG: www.helplink.com/CLAFC
Mike OReilly is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 07:26   #58
Armchair Bucketeer
 
David_Old_Jersey's Avatar

Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 10,013
Images: 4
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

I think a difference in attitude between those whose demise is the result of a sudden(ish!) event and others whose demise comes after a long slow decline.

IMO if all your regrets are only about your own life and not about others you care about then not done half bad.

Out of choice (which in practice most folks don't get) my preference is going out on a wave of morphine - but ideally only after a week or 2!........which will generate more than enough happy feelings to smooth yer passage accross the River Styx - I wonder what anchor the ferryman has onboard?!
__________________
David_Old_Jersey is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 07:27   #59
Long Range Cruiser
 
MarkJ's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Australian living on "Sea Life" currently in England.
Boat: Beneteau 393 "Sea Life"
Posts: 12,828
Images: 25
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Blue Crab View Post
I'm surprised that most have no regrets. Do you all have no roads not taken, decisions that turned out poorly, jobs turned down, words not spoken, people dropped behind? I sure do.
I've made all those mistakes and keep making mistakes, hopefully less than when I was younger. But all thos mistakes were part of the making of me. Yes in retrospect I would change them, but I can't regret them. I've done what I can, or what I have wanted to be able to do. So I'm very lucky. And I hope I keep being lucky for many years.
__________________
Notes on a Circumnavigation.
OurLifeAtSea.com

Somalia Pirates and our Convoy
MarkJ is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-12-2012, 07:46   #60
Registered User
 
mbianka's Avatar

Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 2,125
Images: 1
Re: Top 5 Regrets of the Dying.

Tellie:

Sad as it is at this time your Dad's job is over here. Now it's your job to keep on living.
__________________

__________________
Capt. Mike
mbianka is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Freshwater Tank Leaks at Top crashkahuna Construction, Maintenance & Refit 5 16-07-2011 11:22
The Top 10 Dead Horses Target9000 Off Topic Forum 153 15-07-2011 11:19
Battery Terminal Cover or Cover Entire Battery Top ? sdowney717 Electrical: Batteries, Generators & Solar 5 14-07-2011 05:14



Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 18:56.


Google+
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

ShowCase vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.