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Old 18-09-2006, 09:39   #1
One of Those
 
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Location: Turks and Caicos Islands
Boat: Catalac 12M
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This sounds like my ex....

THE CURTAIN RODS

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates,
And suitcases. On the second day, she had the movers come and collect
Her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful
Dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background music,
And feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a bottle of
Chardonnay.


When she had finished, she went into each and every room and stuffed
Half-eaten shrimp shells dipped in caviar into the hollow of all of
The curtain rods.

She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss for
The first few days. Then, slowly, the house began to smell. They
Tried everything:

Cleaning, mopping, and ai ring the place out. Vents were checked for
Dead rodents, carpets were steam cleaned, and air fresheners were
Hung everywhere!


Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which
They had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to
Replace the expensive wool carpeting. Nothing worked. People stopped
Coming over to visit. Repairmen refused to work in the house. The
Maid quit. Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and
decided to move.


A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they
Could not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and,
Eventually, even the local realtors refused to return their calls.
Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to
Purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man and asked how things were going. He to ld
Her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely and said
That she missed her old home terribly and would be willing to reduce
Her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back.
Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on a
Price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth, but
Only if she were to sign the papers that very day.

She agreed, and, within the hour, his lawyers delivered the
Paperwork. A week later, the man and his girlfriend stood smiling as
They watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new
Home, including the curtain rods.

I just love a happy ending, don't you?

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Old 18-09-2006, 10:27   #2
One of Those
 
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I didnt write it. In fact, it was forwarded to me by my current, and third, wife. She knows my second ex-wife and was yanking my chain. I love a woman with a sense of humor....

I got some ex tales to tell, too. How long were you in jail?...
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Old 18-09-2006, 11:00   #3
One of Those
 
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I just paid off my first ex's child support lump sum. From what I hear, shes using it to drink herself to death.

Second ex, well, she was smarter. By the time I made bail (almost three weeks in county jail) I got out with restraining order against me, guns confiscated, and all bank accts and credit cards either cancelled or my name removed. I hit the streets with exactly $ 1.72 in my pocket. Judge gave her the contents of the house. Spent a week homeless in the woods ( New England, late Feb) until I got picked up by police sleeping under a stolen plastic tarp in a woodpile. To the hospital, then into a shelter. Arranged for a gun dealer to pick up my guns at the police station and buy them, and used the money to pay for a bed in a better shelter...got a job driving cabs...then got financial settlement for my part of the house...and was on my way to florida with a van full of handyman tools when I started dating my present wife. My plan was to re-finish teak and live at a motel owned by my former cell-mate, well, I skipped Florida entirely, got married and moved to the Turks and Caicos.

I literally lost everything I owned, the accumulation of a lifetime of travelling the world, started over in my early 50's,

But I am MUCH better now....
and looking for a boat.
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Old 18-09-2006, 21:05   #4
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I still lost almost everything...... I have two ex's and I was awarded sole custody both times...... My ex's were ordered to pay me child support. The first ex, $25.00 per month. What a joke. I lost everything, but I got the kids.


You guys should consider supporting a "Father's Rights Group" My favorite is Dads America at http://www.dadsamerica.org ...... They used to be "Dads Against Discrimination"

Knottybuoyz, You'll find an article on the "Dad's" web site where the federal courts ruled ordering child support through college is unconstitutional. The courts don't order married parents to put their child through college or trade schools, therefore it is unconstitutional for the courts to order divorced parents to do so.

Good luck,
Bill
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Old 18-09-2006, 22:05   #5
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I was going to ask what this has to do with boats, but then I remembered how much ex #2 hated my boats, and was glad to let them go when we split. Thank god for ex's
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Old 19-09-2006, 05:49   #6
One of Those
 
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Yeah. My first ex and I lived happy carefree lives for 20 years.....then we met...
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Old 19-09-2006, 06:27   #7
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I have no iadea on Canadian laws. There is a link to Dads Canada, here's that link: http://www.dadscanada.com

My son now 27 is somewhat diabled and we knew early we didn't have to plan for his college. He will be a financial burden the rest of his life, but college was and still is out of the question. On the other hand, my 14 yr old daughter is gifted and she started planning her college when she was 10 yrs old. She "IS" going to college.
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