What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
Nothing, they just waved.
Why does a milking stool have only 3 legs?
Because the cow has the utter.
What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown?
Does this taste funny
What do you call a cow with no legs?
Did you hear about the two fat men
who ran in the New York
One ran in short bursts, the other in burst shorts!
How does an idiot call for his dog?
He puts two fingers in his mouth and then shouts Rover.
How are a chicken and a grape alike?
They are both purple... except for the chicken.
Why do bees hum?
Because they don't know the words!
A horse enters a bar and walks over to the bartender, the bartender looks at the horse and says, hey buddy, why the long face?
A horse walks into a bar. The bar tender
The horse says "Sure."
What's the difference between a tennis ball and the prince of Wale's?
One is heir to the throne and the other is thrown into the air.
How do crazy people go through the forest?
They take the psycho path.
How do you get holy water
Boil the hell out of it.
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice too long?
What do prisoners use to call each other?
What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
What do you call four bull fighters in quicksand?
What do you get from a pampered cow?
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?
What has four legs, is big, green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you?
A pool table.
What is a zebra?
26 sizes larger than an "A" bra.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.