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Old 18-08-2016, 14:15   #1621
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by BlackAdder View Post
This one is genius...

Two guys with no arms and legs hanging in a window?

Curt & Rod

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ha ha ha, great first post! welcome aboard!
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Old 18-08-2016, 14:21   #1622
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Quote:
Originally Posted by LakeSuperior View Post
Did you hear about the cannibal who passed a stranger in the woods?
Crappy story, eh?

Did you hear that when the FBI kicked in Jeffery Dahmer's door to arrest him he was just sitting at the table, eating a sandwich, quietly singing to himself?


My baloney has a first name........
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Old 18-08-2016, 14:29   #1623
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Re: The New Joke Thread

As a result of a near mutiny the overbearing and arrogant captain was forced to see a psychiatrist by order of the commodore.


As soon as the captain became comfortable on the couch, the psychiatrist began the session by asking the captain, "Why don't you start at the beginning?"


The captain said, " Okay. In the beginning I created heaven and the earth..."
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Old 18-08-2016, 19:53   #1624
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Re: The New Joke Thread

https://youtu.be/FaUkcd18yjE
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Old 18-08-2016, 20:33   #1625
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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That reminds me of how badly NBC is screwing up the Olympics with all of the incessant commentary. I hit the mute button.
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Old 18-08-2016, 20:37   #1626
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Re: The New Joke Thread

What do you call a female Australian rocket scientist?



Sheila.
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Old 18-08-2016, 20:41   #1627
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Where does the 900 lb gorilla sit?



Pretty much anywhere he wants to.
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Old 18-08-2016, 20:44   #1628
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Does a bear crap in the woods?


Well, according to the rabbit with the brown streak...
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Old 18-08-2016, 22:26   #1629
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Re: The New Joke Thread

What does the 900 lb gorilla eat?


Pretty much anything he wants to.
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Old 18-08-2016, 22:28   #1630
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Who does the 900 lb gorilla have sex with?





Are you kidding?? Nobody.

He's married.
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Old 19-08-2016, 03:44   #1631
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Greetings and welcome aboard the CF, BlackAdder.
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Old 19-08-2016, 06:38   #1632
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Re: The New Joke Thread

Yay!! Thanks Gord. Like clockwork.

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Old 19-08-2016, 07:57   #1633
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Re: The New Joke Thread

If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman around to hear him.....

Is he still wrong?
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Old 19-08-2016, 08:09   #1634
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Re: The New Joke Thread

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Originally Posted by Thorne View Post
If a man speaks in the forest and there is no woman around to hear him.....

Is he still wrong?
If he's single, no.

If he's married, yes.
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Old 19-08-2016, 09:46   #1635
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Re: The New Joke Thread

An engineer's wife left a note for him to prepare dinner that evening:
Shepherd’s Pie needs to be taken out of the fridge and placed in the oven at 120 degrees.
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