The Cult Of Likabilty

[socaldmax]

Originally Posted by Sea Dreaming

I'm not sure I can explain my thought very well but I am going to try.

The thing is, when others bash on your ideas a bit, it feels bad. It feels bad because you are not "fitting in". Therefore, the conformist in the room is yourself!

I'm not picking on anyone here. The above line applies to myself quite a bit! It's very much the human nature to want validation. Support from others is very validating. But the true genius of non-conformity is to be quite comfortable with being uncomfortable. It's realizing that others can only validate what they know. If they don't known it, they can't validate it. But that only reflects on them. Not you.

I think you're looking at it from the wrong side. Everything you said is true, but the problem isn't how the person getting bashed feels or accepts the bashing...

the problem is the people who feel they need to bash someone else who thinks outside of the box. Why? I never take it personally, they're arguing about the info in my post, which I don't take personally. 95% of the time, it turns out they misread my post, or just simply could not grasp what I clearly typed.

Are they insecure? Too stupid to understand just how brilliant the other person is? (Remember the history stories about the theory of the earth being round, which planet rotated around which, the discovery of most of the laws of physics?) Even some of the most learned scientists of those eras were the loudest to shout about heresy and burning the "nonconformist" at the stake.

Why did they do it then? Probably a very strong need to "fit in" since history was rife with examples of those who "stuck out" getting struck down, either by the senseless mob or by the powers to be fearful of something new.

Sadly, human nature hasn't changed, they've just developed technology to more efficiently and quickly spread their disapproval or electronically lynch the nonconformist.

These days, the nonconformists could be someone who isn't politically correct, or who isn't afraid of those who routinely throw the racist label at the first hint of differing viewpoints. I'm especially disturbed by how vicious people are getting on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. I don't post on any of those social media platforms, but I'm amazed at the brazen ******** who spend their entire lives (apparently) jumping on someone with both feet at the slightest hint they may have done something out of the norm, like buying 300 presents for her kids for Xmas. Why is it anyone else's concern? What makes them think it is even a topic for discussion? Who cares? It's her money, her children, her personal life, so stick your nose back on your face. Perhaps she shouldn't have shared the pic on Facebook, but the avalanche of hate dumped on her does not bode well for humanity (at least those who e-hated on her.)

This has been going on for eternity, it started in the town market and over the fence, now it spreads on texts and Twitter. This is why I call anyone who closes their mind and starts lynching someone online a "sheeple." Their posts don't reflect an honest opinion arrived at by rational thought, their posts are designed to show how they fit in by attacking others. They suck up to those they think are in power, and attack those whom they perceive as one of those on the fringe. They're easy to spot, just throw a little carefully worded bait out there and they're quick to jump on it to prove how conformist they are in a vain effort to fit in.

This is why I've often pointed out that, statistically speaking, 50% of the population is below average. Even average is pathetically low. Considering that some of the members of CF must be in the top 10% to be as well educated and as well regarded as they are in their chosen field (whether it's medicine, GPS, programming, naval architecture, etc) sometimes it astonishes me when someone who knows virtually nothing questions a well regarded expert in the field. That explains why another one of my favorite sayings is, "Just because you bought a computer doesn't mean you should be posting on the internet."

[newhaul]

Originally Posted by SV THIRD DAY

What if Everything we think we know is wrong?
A nice Sunday evening head trip...

Everything We Have Been Taught About Our Origins Is A Lie

Interesting read lots of it is very interesting and very nonconforming.

[socaldmax]

Originally Posted by Guy

Water flows downhill everywhere on earth. Why say otherwise? It's a waste of almost everybody's time to argue that.

To be overly simplistic, you would be correct. Gravity is the predominant force acting upon water on a slope.

But sometimes gravity isn't the only force acting upon water. I'm surprised that a sailor has forgotten about the wind as a motive force.


Now to be clear, my motivation in clarifying this is not to argue, but to point out that one should be very careful with posting absolutes, because there are many exceptions to the rules and posting absolutes makes it appear that one is either ignorant of the exceptions or too simple enough to give thorough, thoughtful, helpful advice.

Now some people might view my post as a sign of nonconformity, and since I rarely just nod my head and agree (unless I'm trying to get my date into bed) it might look that way to many. But I'm a thinking being, and I think quite a bit faster and more thoroughly than most in analyzing statements or situations. The byproduct of this is a lot of people don't take kindly to my contradicting them on a public forum. However, that is their problem (a personal one), because my purpose in posting is to share correct info, not validate anyone's ego.

[colemj]

Originally Posted by GordMay

I've asked: "If you didn't have the time or money to do it right in the first place, when will you get the time/$ to fix it?" over 27,000 times, and never had a good answer.

Oh, that one is easy. There are many times I've cobbled together a "not right" fix because of time or money. Some of those poor incorrect fixes are still operating today.

Some are even better than the original "right" thing!

Mark

[zeehag]

some of those poor incorrect fixes were done in obscure locales in some cases.....
why be liked when ye can be real. i prefer real, thankyou.
speaking of conformity--peer pressure in this locale woulda got me a foul alleged mechanic who was booted out of a few places before landing here, a large unpayable replacement of engine with yanmar bill, and stuck at sea...oops.. i found someone honest to fix my boat..
non conformity wins...sheep lose.
oh yeah i even had the triple audacity to leave san diego in april,not november--omygods and ididnt yet die. cannot speak about the immediate future, but then i didnt...
likeability??
sorry, i would rather be honest and deal with honesty in return.

[Delancey]

Originally Posted by colemj

Oh, that one is easy. There are many times I've cobbled together a "not right" fix because of time or money. Some of those poor incorrect fixes are still operating today.

Some are even better than the original "right" thing!

Mark

I think this highlights the worst possible downside to groupthink and the pressure to conform.

Sometimes things are done a certain way for a very good reason. Sometimes things are done a certain way simply because no one ever bothered to figure out a better way.

In the absence of people who think differently, people willing to question the status quo and be innovative, the blind have no alternative but to follow the blind.

[colemj]

Originally Posted by Delancey

the blind have no alternative but to follow the blind.

Sometimes around here it seems like the blind leading the naked.

Another example is the whole PVC vs. ungodly expensive and difficult to install "correct" hose with regards to head plumbing. In this case, both time and money led me to go with PVC.

And it is far superior in every way over the "correct" alternative. I can even get replacement parts from grass huts in far islands!

Mark

[ImaginaryNumber]

[senormechanico]

Originally Posted by SV THIRD DAY

What if Everything we think we know is wrong?
A nice Sunday evening head trip...

Everything We Have Been Taught About Our Origins Is A Lie

What an interesting read !

[Canibul]

I tried defying conventional wisdom once. Found out they were right. I died instantly.

[socaldmax]

Originally Posted by Canibul

I tried defying conventional wisdom once. Found out they were right. I died instantly.

So you're communicating from the after life... interesting!


How hot is it there?

[SV THIRD DAY]

Originally Posted by Canibul

I tried defying conventional wisdom once. Found out they were right. I died instantly.

Love it....
Sometimes the quest to defy conventional wisdom gets one killed when conventional wisdom is correct.

[Canibul]

81 F at the moment.

[Stu Jackson]

Originally Posted by colemj

Oh, that one is easy. There are many times I've cobbled together a "not right" fix because of time or money. Some of those poor incorrect fixes are still operating today.

Some are even better than the original "right" thing!

Mark

And other posts.

Often "solutions" are found by examining OPTIONS. I'm quite sure many of us, in our business lives (remember those? OK, OK, you don't have to!!!) have given our clients the options to answers they may have thought only had ONE answer.

Partially called creativity.

[socaldmax]

Originally Posted by Canibul

81 F at the moment.

That's not bad at all! One less thing I have to worry about when the time comes.