Single Sailors Seeking Soul Mate Group

[SaltyMonkey]

alaskamountainman, Paligic, anjou are definitely removing SaltyMonkey cynicism out of the air. thanks.

[Gadagirl]

Hi Erika! Thanks for your imagination, ideas, and work. You have gumption!

[Sailorgrl]

A group of single sailors.. Love it. Looking for friends to so don't be shy.

[Ocean Girl]

Hi Sailorgrl, have you joined our singles group? (we would love to have you)

UPDATE:

We now have 132 memebers and they are not all guys

Hope you all are doing well. It is HOT but beautiful down here in Texas.

Cheers,
Erika

[Sailorgrl]

Hi Erika,
Yep. I joined last night. What part of Texas do you live? I am in Oregon but trust me it is hot here too. 102 yesterday and been in the high 90's for a month. Here is a question. I posted a profile pic but I think I am the only one who can see it. Were you able to see it when you looked at my profile? Thanks for the welcome!!
Kala

[osirissail]

Originally Posted by anjou

DOnt be such an old cynic Mark
Not all women are gold digging, money sucking leeches. . .
DOnt be bitter please, its not attractive. I fancied you but can go off you pretty fast ya know.

[Maybe a little spice will get this thread going again . . .]
The "not all" is true in and of itself as "not all" of anything is absolutely only one way. But the vast majority of western females has been born, breed and raised on a steady diet of propaganda that is summed up in the famous feminist line: "A woman needs a man, like a fish needs a bicycle."
- - Add in a whole life of being bombarded by Hollywood romance in TV, movies and "romance novels" and you will see maybe why MarkJ has expressed a realistic assessment of the "average" western woman.
- - Expectations are so far away from the historical reality of man-woman relationships that most are doomed before they even start. So the first thing you must do if you want to find a "soulmate" is purge yourself of all the "BS" put out by various media and find out what your great-grandmother did to make their marriages last 50+ years.
- - Secondly, a "soul-mate" will not magically appear from nowhere to find you. You have to get busy and find that person(s). That takes work - because most all the good women and good men are already taken and out there cruising together on the 7 seas. And it is that example that there are long term cruising couples who are committed and truly in love/respect for each other that points to the exception of anything stated as "all."
- - So step number 1, purge yourself of the media BS and get "real." Get real about who you are and what you need to be comfortable with somebody else on a boat. Get real about what things about you are sources of friction when you are in a relationship. Make hard decisions about what you are willing - and able - to do to change some of them.
- - And get to work searching for a mate who shares your two or three most important interests in life. And it is this finding someone who also shares at least two or three of the major most important things in your life that is the "secret" recipe for happiness.
- - Otherwise, be happy in your "single-hood" and enjoy the company of others and the bliss of peace and solitude when you are alone. Some people were not meant to be paired off. It's the lone wolf/she-wolf thing.

[anjou]

Forget history eh?


I dont need a film, book or leader to show me the way, so im not swayed by the hollywood version of ficticious events.

Lucky for me, my grandmother was a ballsy lady and paddled her own canoe through life, (spot the resemblence ?) but many women have historically been barefoot, pregnant and hog tied to the kitchen sink, so Im not going to search the annals of history for lessons on how to conduct myself

Im busy making my own future and doing it my way. Ive got the bit between my teeth and im going for it. Im happy in my singlehood and dont 'Need' someone in my life. If they come in, thats great but I also need my space too.

It will take an exceptional person to catch me now.

[SaltyMonkey]

I have learned, very early on, that people like osirissail who have a trend to lecture and be pretentious about relationships don't usually know squat about them. In fact, they tend to be delusional in their own self righteousness beliefs in just about everything.

Whats good for one person is what's good for them - unless you live in North Korea.

Long Live Jane Austin!

[Ram]

Originally Posted by anjou

Forget history eh?


I dont need a film, book or leader to show me the way, so im not swayed by the hollywood version of ficticious events.

Lucky for me, my grandmother was a ballsy lady and paddled her own canoe through life, (spot the resemblence ?) but many women have historically been barefoot, pregnant and hog tied to the kitchen sink, so Im not going to search the annals of history for lessons on how to conduct myself

Im busy making my own future and doing it my way. Ive got the bit between my teeth and im going for it. Im happy in my singlehood and dont 'Need' someone in my life. If they come in, thats great but I also need my space too.

It will take an exceptional person to catch me now.

BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[flysci]

Originally Posted by SaltyMonkey

I have learned, very early on, that people like osirissail who have a trend to lecture and be pretentious about relationships don't usually know squat about them.

A valid opinion, SaltyMonkey, but I think he made a few good points. Not about the "historical" approach to marriage - I'm with you on that Anjou!

But there are a lot of preconceptions people bring into relationships that hinder their success in finding a compatible mate. And some of that does come from current media. Wanting the "in" thing, the current style, extends to more than just clothes or electronics. Many care very much for their "status" in that respect.

Though we would all say we agree that you 'shouldn't judge a book by it's cover', most of us, especially men, do. If the first time you meet a woman and she's in ill-fitting, unflattering clothes, no makeup, hair tied or covered or otherwise 'unfixed', probably because she's been working on her boat, or some similarly intense passion, would you ever consider her as a potential mate? Can you get beyond the external to imagine intimacy based on a shared 'love' of sailing or cruising? What if she's taller than you? older than you? unconventional in some other way?

I believe I must widen my criteria to be as inclusive as possible if I am ever to find a mate. Sometimes I get cynical and think it's too late for me to find someone compatible. But mostly I'm still hoping. I'm going on with building my life as a cruiser on my boat, working on a joyful life, remaining open to whatever might come my way.

And by the way, whether or not a man has money plays NO part in my search (P.S. wanting a man with money is not limited to "western" women - only the amount that's sufficient is different ). But then, I'm not materialistic and am older but wiser!

Margo

[SaltyMonkey]

Originally Posted by flysci

But there are a lot of preconceptions people bring into relationships that hinder their success in finding a compatible mate. And some of that does come from current media. Wanting the "in" thing, the current style, extends to more than just clothes or electronics. Many care very much for their "status" in that respect.

Ummm...sooo what exactly is new about this? Preconceptions about marriage and relationships, and the social and media expectations and projections have always been around.

Originally Posted by flysci

If the first time you meet a woman and she's in ill-fitting, unflattering clothes, no makeup, hair tied or covered or otherwise 'unfixed', probably because she's been working on her boat, or some similarly intense passion, would you ever consider her as a potential mate?

Are you kidding?? That's about the sexiest image I ever heard! I would mate with her on the spot!

[David_Old_Jersey]

Originally Posted by osirissail

the famous feminist line: "A woman needs a man, like a fish needs a bicycle.".

You may be surprised to see a fish riding a bicycle, but not half as surprised as the fish who realises they need and enjoy cycling

Women can be quite surprising, even to themselves.

But some (and men too ) can simply be too much like hard work - for a squillion varied reasons. Probably also good to remember that amongst (us ) middle aged (+) folks their have been enough life experiances to create some truly f#cked up puppies with some strange ideas and bizarre expectations.

I have no problem with folks having high expectations and requirements (good on ya!) - just don't expect me to meet them without a quid pro quo that I consider worthwhile, nor be surprised (let alone be offended or puzzled) that an offer of some Jiggy Jiggy on tap and a couple of 2nd hand kids to pay for ain't high on my list of worthwhile bargains............

Others may value things differently.


Next time I'm gonna marry a goat. you know where you are with goats

[captainKJ]

Next time I'm gonna marry a goat. you know where you are with goats ?????????????????????????????????????????????????? ???????????????????

no comment

[zeehag]

Originally Posted by captainKJ

Next time I'm gonna marry a goat. you know where you are with goats ?????????????????????????????????????????????????? ???????????????????

no comment

ROFLMFAO AND AMEN!!!!!!!

[captainKJ]

David_Old_Jersey
Send me a photo of your boat,,, i think I know someone who is interested,,,, right now she does not have a computer and she does have some baggage but they are good KIDS

She LOVES the water