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Old 25-10-2012, 09:03   #1
Don't ask if you can't handle it
 
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"I like Big Boats"

Oh my god
Becky, look at that boat
Its so big
She looks like one of those production guys boats
Who understands those production boat guys
They only sail to her because she looks like a floating condo
I mean her stern
It's just so big
I can't believe it's so round
It's just out there
I mean, it's gross
Look, she's just so cat

*rap*
I like big boats and I can not lie
You other sailors can't deny
That when a boat sails in with an itty bitty bow
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung
Wanna pull up tough
Cuz you notice that boat is stuffed
Deep in the beam she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh, baby I wanna get with ya
And take your picture
My yachties tried to warn me
But that stern you got
Make Me so horney
Ooh, rump of smooth hull
You say you wanna get in my slip
Well use me use me cuz you aint that average cruisy

I've seen them sailin
To hell with a trimin
She's Sweat, Wet, got it goin like a turbo vette

I'm tired of CF and magazines
Saying narrow sterns are the thing
Take the average sailor and ask him that
She gotta pack much in back

So Fellas (yeah) Fellas(yeah)
Has your boat got the butt (hell yeah)
Well sail it, sail it, sail it, sail it, sail that healthy butt


Baby got back

I like'em round and big
And when I'm throwin a gig
I just can't help myself
I'm actin like an animal
Now here's my scandal

I wanna get you home
And UH, double up UH UH
I aint talkin bout This Old Boat
Cuz wooden parts were made for toys
I wannem real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Don's in trouble
Beggin for a piece of that bubble
So I'm lookin' at sailin’ videos
Knockin those Hunters sailin like hoes
You can have them J-boats
I'll keep my boat like Flo Jo
A word to the thick soul boats
I wanna get with ya
I won't cus or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna --
Til the break of dawn
Baby Got it sailin on
Alot of sailors won't like this song
Cuz them punks lie to hit it and quit it
But I'd rather sail and play
Cuz I'm long and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the wind on

So ladies (yeah), Ladies (yeah)
Do you wanna roll in my boat (yeah)
Then turn around
Check it out
Even Swan boys got to shout
Baby got back

Yeah baby
When it comes to boats
Cruiser Forum ain't got nothin to do with my selection
11’ beam and 5’ draft

Only if she's 22’

So your boat throws a single spreader
Playin workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda ain't got any sail power to drive the bun
My anaconda don't want none unless you've got buns hun
You can do cutters or ketches, but please don't lose that butt
Some sailors wanna play that hard role
And tell you that the stern and beam ain't gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So CF says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that
Cuz your volume is large and your curves are kickin
And I'm thinkin bout stickin


To the narrow beam boats in the magazines
You be missin the cruiser thing
Give me a Hunter I can't resist her
Narrow berths and small cockpits did miss her
Some knucklehead tried to dis
Cuz his boat was on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And pulled up quick to get with 'em
So sailors if the butt is round
And you wanna triple X throw down
Dial 1-900-DONALOT and kick them nasty thoughts
Baby got back
Baby got back
Big in tha middle and she got much back x4


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Old 25-10-2012, 09:07   #2
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

wow... you have waaay too much time on your hands! good job funny as hell
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Old 25-10-2012, 09:07   #3
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

LOL.

There's a boat (not a Hunter! but something similar, a Hanse I think) in Swanwick Marina, on the Hamble, where I keep my dinghy -- I row past it every time on the way to my mooring -- whose name is:

FAT BOTTOMED GIRL

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Old 25-10-2012, 09:27   #4
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

Quote:
Originally Posted by Don Lucas View Post
Oh my god
Becky, look at that boat
Its so big
She looks like one of those production guys boats
Who understands those production boat guys
They only sail to her because she looks like a floating condo
I mean her stern
It's just so big
I can't believe it's so round
It's just out there
I mean, it's gross
Look, she's just so cat

*rap*
I like big boats and I can not lie
You other sailors can't deny
That when a boat sails in with an itty bitty bow
And a round thing in your face
You get sprung
Wanna pull up tough
Cuz you notice that boat is stuffed
Deep in the beam she's wearing
I'm hooked and I can't stop staring
Oh, baby I wanna get with ya
And take your picture
My yachties tried to warn me
But that stern you got
Make Me so horney
Ooh, rump of smooth hull
You say you wanna get in my slip
Well use me use me cuz you aint that average cruisy

I've seen them sailin
To hell with a trimin
She's Sweat, Wet, got it goin like a turbo vette

I'm tired of CF and magazines
Saying narrow sterns are the thing
Take the average sailor and ask him that
She gotta pack much in back

So Fellas (yeah) Fellas(yeah)
Has your boat got the butt (hell yeah)
Well sail it, sail it, sail it, sail it, sail that healthy butt

Baby got back

I like'em round and big
And when I'm throwin a gig
I just can't help myself
I'm actin like an animal
Now here's my scandal

I wanna get you home
And UH, double up UH UH
I aint talkin bout This Old Boat
Cuz wooden parts were made for toys
I wannem real thick and juicy
So find that juicy double
Don's in trouble
Beggin for a piece of that bubble
So I'm lookin' at sailin’ videos
Knockin those Hunters sailin like hoes
You can have them J-boats
I'll keep my boat like Flo Jo
A word to the thick soul boats
I wanna get with ya
I won't cus or hit ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna --
Til the break of dawn
Baby Got it sailin on
Alot of sailors won't like this song
Cuz them punks lie to hit it and quit it
But I'd rather sail and play
Cuz I'm long and I'm strong
And I'm down to get the wind on

So ladies (yeah), Ladies (yeah)
Do you wanna roll in my boat (yeah)
Then turn around
Check it out
Even Swan boys got to shout
Baby got back

Yeah baby
When it comes to boats
Cruiser Forum ain't got nothin to do with my selection
11’ beam and 5’ draft
Only if she's 22’

So your boat throws a single spreader
Playin workout tapes by Fonda
But Fonda ain't got any sail power to drive the bun
My anaconda don't want none unless you've got buns hun
You can do cutters or ketches, but please don't lose that butt
Some sailors wanna play that hard role
And tell you that the stern and beam ain't gold
So they toss it and leave it
And I pull up quick to retrieve it
So CF says you're fat
Well I ain't down with that
Cuz your volume is large and your curves are kickin
And I'm thinkin bout stickin

To the narrow beam boats in the magazines
You be missin the cruiser thing
Give me a Hunter I can't resist her
Narrow berths and small cockpits did miss her
Some knucklehead tried to dis
Cuz his boat was on my list
He had game but he chose to hit 'em
And pulled up quick to get with 'em
So sailors if the butt is round
And you wanna triple X throw down
Dial 1-900-DONALOT and kick them nasty thoughts
Baby got back
Baby got back
Big in tha middle and she got much back x4

You have missed your true calling MC Don(The Don) Lucas
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Old 25-10-2012, 09:33   #5
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

"Biggy Don"!! Boat must have gone to storage! Great Stuff.....
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Old 25-10-2012, 09:38   #6
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Do you have parachute pants? And maybe some bling?


That's right here they'd be called spinnaker pants.

I crack me up
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Old 25-10-2012, 09:52   #7
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

Youtube video please!
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Old 25-10-2012, 09:55   #8
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

LOL...I'd sail with you anytime......
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Old 25-10-2012, 10:14   #9
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

Butt has got to be bigger than mine before I will sail on her.

Steve
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Old 25-10-2012, 10:21   #10
Don't ask if you can't handle it
 
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

Quote:
Originally Posted by Panope View Post
Butt has got to be bigger than mine before I will sail on her.

Steve

I'm not touching this one
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Old 25-10-2012, 10:23   #11
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

This is great! Definitely sharing as the original is one of my favorite guilty pleasure songs. Thanks for sharing!
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Old 25-10-2012, 11:25   #12
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

Thanks. Word to your mother... Break it down.
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Old 25-10-2012, 11:37   #13
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

I was laughing pretty good on this one. I can imagine one to MC Hammer's "Can't touch this" regarding polished brass or other bright work. I agree to the above that you have a lot of time on your hands. Wish I did, haha.
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Old 25-10-2012, 12:02   #14
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

Awesome. I needed this on a truly crappy day at work....THANKS DON!!!!
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Old 25-10-2012, 12:23   #15
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Re: "I like Big Boats"

If I get liquored up enough I'll do that on a video.
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