How to sneak into beach resorts

[Dr. Strangelove]

I'll play! I may or may not have sneaked into a place or two in my youth (nothing current, of course )

Dr. Strangelove's Rules for Crashing Events, or What They Don't Know Won't Hurt Them.

1.) Pick your venue carefully. If it's a small group and everyone knows everyone, you're out of luck. Be sure there isn't too much security, (unless it's the White House, apparently you can just waltz right on in 2009 U.S. state dinner security breaches - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia).

2.) Dress the part, wear what everyone else is wearing. Don't be ridiculously under or over dressed, you'll stand out. A pair of slacks and a sports-coat is golden anywhere except a black-tie affair.

3.) Simply walk in, no sneaking or silly Peter Sellers type stuff. If they're checking names, you're pretty much screwed (again, unless it's the White House, see above link) for the direct entrance and will have to use a side door (most often unmanned, unless it's a real high security type event). Try to walk in with a large group of other people.

4.) Be confident, don't call attention to yourself but don't hide, either. Do whatever the other guests are doing. Try to stay on the fringes of a crowd so that you blend in.

5.) If it's an open bar/open buffet kind of function, help yourself, but don't draw attention to yourself by making giant plates, ten trips to the buffet/bar, or getting frat-boy drunk. Note - don't stiff the place for food/drink/anything else, that's just not cool. An open buffet or bar is one thing, but don't dine and dash.

You can essentially walk into any place you like as long as you look and act the part.

I lived at the beach in Florida for years and most of mid-range hotels and condo places just don't care/don't notice an extra guest or two as long as you look the part and don't act the fool. The Ritz Carlton or the Don CeSar type places DO care and they know who are guests and who aren't, believe me.

Flame on, prudes!

[Jim Cate]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

We may only go this way once, but theres a hell of a lot of cruisers following.

Speaking as one who has sometimes had the bad luck to follow behind a scumbag cruiser, I agree wholeheartedly with Mark here.

For instance, on the East coast of Oz there is a small island pair (Brampton and Carlisle) with a small resort thereon. For years yotties were welcome to come ashore, have a meal, use the pool and the bar and so on. They only asked that one come to reception and check in... no charge. But inevitably, folks (like the folks who think that sneaking about is a good thing) abused the system. Charged meals to a room, behaved rudely and annoyed paying guests, left big messes behind... that sort of thing. On our next trip north we stopped in and were told to go away. Even after satisfying the management that we were long term customers and so on we were denied access. This sort of legacy lingers long after the scumbags depart.

Jim

[Lake-Effect]

My biggest takeaway from the thread - you folks will spar about ANYTHING! Doesn't have to be guns, anchors, AGW, which fork for salad...

I don't get it - why are y'all so keen to mix it up on here? I'm a Great Lakes sailor for now, and I still hafta work for a living, which means ... winter... which is my excuse for forum-surfing. But I see so many of you, ostensibly living the good life aboard your dream boats in the tropics... and you post more often than me! Trolling, even.

Does cruising get that boring after a while?

My sympathies to the mods...

[Aussiesuede]

Originally Posted by a64pilot

You might be surprised what you can get if you ask, and offer to pay. I have a guy that I let hunt my property, because he asked

This.

I discovered long ago the power of asking. Back in college I ended up having my name passed about a group of wealthy friends in Malibu to house sit for them based on one simple conversation I'd had with a friend of theirs where I made a request that most were probably too 'clever' to have ever made. Had I not 'asked' then I would have never garnered access to some pretty kewl stuff which are beyond my means. All it took was asking a simple question to the right person, (and then my trying to talk him out of granting that request) to open up an entire world which would have otherwise been unavailable to me. Hearing 'No' after asking is a hell of a lot better than 'getting caught'. That feeling sucks big time!.

That said, if the folks the OP encountered showed no problems with his presence, then all's well. I'm not a fan of making waves in becalmed waters.

[SimonV]

Don't sneak, walk in like you have just arrived and should be there. If you plan to use the facilities other than pool bar and restaurant, talk to the barman. I found the bar staff are the best point of contact especially if you have just bought a drink. If not the bar staff give the sports and rec shack a try. Number one thing don't be a dick.

[CarinaPDX]

This thread, as with the current thread asking about hiding firearms, is symptomatic of an attitude which inevitably gets many experienced cruisers' backs up, as exemplified by Jim Cate's post. Many doors have been closed to cruisers over the years because of misbehavior based on "What can I get away with?" and reflected in the question "how do I get away with it?". These questions start with the assumption that the activity is wrong; otherwise, why not ask the hotel (or not hide the weapon on the other thread)? This is really very simple: it is their property, their country, and they get to set the rules. Asking nicely may encounter some flexibility; arrogantly sneaking about will only worsen the situation for those that follow. There is a strong ethic among many cruisers to leave a clean wake (see SSCA); if you choose to do otherwise do not be surprised to be the recipient of harsh comments: you brought it on yourself.

Of course there are few saints in this world. But there is a distinction between the petty indiscretions people do in their own backyard, where the consequences are well understood and can't be avoided by moving along, and those done in another country with the attitude that if caught they can leave the mess behind.

As for the specific case presented, it is really simple: first ask if the restaurant or bar is available for your use, then ask to shower off beforehand. If they welcome your business for food and drink, they will likely be pleased you cleaned up first. If there is a charge then either pay or leave. Using a service and not asking because you suspect the answer is "no" is a form of (petty) theft. I never cease to be amazed at how little it takes for some people to compromise their integrity. Oh well...

Greg

[senormechanico]

Originally Posted by Tellie

I suppose it's fine to sneak into a hotel use it's facilities and justify it with buying a few drinks. I also suppose that you wouldn't mind then, while you are at this hotel, that some of the hotel staff, without asking, borrow your dingy and head out to your boat and take it out for a few hours of leisurely cruising as long as they replace the small amount of diesel they used would you?

I couldn't have said it better.

Years ago, I entertained a couple of ladies from So Cal who were staying in "Los Angeles Locos" an all inclusive hotel in Tenacatita Bay Mexico with an afternoon sail. They kept saying, "I feel like I'm in a movie."

No charge of course...

[MarkJ]

Originally Posted by Lake-Effect

I'm a Great Lakes sailor for now, and I still hafta work for a living, which means ... winter... which is my excuse for forum-surfing. But I see so many of you, ostensibly living the good life aboard your dream boats in the tropics... and you post more often than me! Trolling, even.

Does cruising get that boring after a while?

My sympathies to the mods...

So you would prefer a cruising forum where anyone who has actually gone cruising isnt allowed to post?

My sympathies to the other forum users.

[senormechanico]

What ever happened to "Leave A Clean Wake" ?

The "Something For Nothing" crowd seems to be taking over, to the dearth of the Quality of Long Term Cruising.

History will note this, and not in a good way.

[youmeandthed]

as a cruiser under 30 (yes there are a couple of us), age is very obvious in this thread.

recently retired cruisers are the worst, they over pay for everything and price the locals out of things they could once afford. My experience in the developing world is everyone is trying to take from everyone else, especially from the gringo. No one ever expects a gringo to be in on the gig too.

Rules to a successful all inclusive invation:

1. be the nicest, friendliest and most outgoing person there

2. some guests are cool with you crashing the party (as long as you add to the fun), some aren't, you will figure out which ones to hang with (and you can actually tell them about what you are doing and they will likely think you are awesome!) remember start with your cover story (bad flight, ripped off by taxi, so glad to be here)

3. talk to everyone and tell them you are staying there

4. research the resort online to find out if they have wrist bands (it will be obvious)

5. go to the beach bar first

6. always have a drink in your hand

7. make new friends

8. shave and be clean before you go use the facilities

9. Be nice to the underpaid, overworked, under appreciated, and hard working local staff

10. don't worry about the "cruisers" who are nay sayers, they won't be doing this, so you won't ruin it for them in the future.


Most places where we cruise, you buy a meal and get the wifi password and showers and dinghy dock free.

[martinworswick]

Originally Posted by Tellie

Really? In what way?

If he helped himself to a drink from behind the bar and left just enough cash to pay for that drink at wholesale rates it might be the same analogy

[Lake-Effect]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

So you would prefer a cruising forum where anyone who has actually gone cruising isnt allowed to post?.

That's not what I said at all. I have zero problem with the thread; I was just observing how even a minor topic like this gets heated so quickly. And I note that it's not just winter-bound slobs like me; it seems that fulltime cruisers, out there living the dream are as thin-skinned or moreso.

You're smashing my illusion of fulltime cruising as nirvana. Cut it out.

(do I need a smily here, or do you now get my drift?)

[El Pinguino]

One has to admire the OP for having had the foresight to have previously knocked off some towels from another resort in the same chain.....

[CarinaPDX]

In my experience the cruising community is relatively indifferent to wealth, age, boat, nationality - you name it, all are welcome. But there is a divide between those who at least try to do the right thing and pay their way versus those who try to "live off the land". The latter group have caused all sorts of problems for cruisers. This is why some cruisers can get quite excited by topics like this - they have seen good situations spoiled by such behavior. For those who haven't spent years cruising I would recommend taking a listen instead of criticizing the retired folks. BTW my 16 years of cruising were all before I qualified for social security. And (anticipating the rejoinder) this is not about wealth - most cruisers on a tight budget are too proud to sponge off others.

Greg

[sailorboy1]

I think some people here posted just after watching their football team lose.