Funny Things I Did in the Navy

[Lodesman]

Originally Posted by Mule

You know, it is real funny how getting a commission ruins one's sense of humor.

... I was in charge of the crew, the stran and hose that for fuel trolleyed over on...

I hit the keeper on the hook, thereby releasing the stran which really screwed up the only fueling port we had, tore up the hose and just generally fubared everything.

...Funny, all the enlisted thought the whole thing was hilarious, but the Officers?? Not so much.

So you caused tens of thousands of dollars in damages to two ships (what the heck, it's just taxpayers' money), dumped who knows how much DFO into the sea (hmmm, good for the fishies) and made your ship combat ineffective --- all in a petty attempt to show up some newbie. It wasn't the commission that set the officers apart - it was their sense of pride and professionalism.

For what it's worth, the vast majority of non-com's in the Canadian Navy are professionals who would never consider doing what you did.

[Mule]

Originally Posted by Lodesman

So you caused tens of thousands of dollars in damages to two ships (what the heck, it's just taxpayers' money), dumped who knows how much DFO into the sea (hmmm, good for the fishies) and made your ship combat ineffective --- all in a petty attempt to show up some newbie. It wasn't the commission that set the officers apart - it was their sense of pride and professionalism.

For what it's worth, the vast majority of non-com's in the Canadian Navy are professionals who would never consider doing what you did.

I NEVER Did NOR WOULD I DISOBEY A DIRECT ORDER FROM AN OFFICER!

That is a good way to get court marshalled, I would buck a Chief, or a First Class Petty Oficer, but once you go comissioned, I do what I am told. I had no idea what all would happen, I followed orders. Had I been on a sub, where enlisted men get the respect they deserve, perhaps. Where I was, with the conditions on that ship and pretty well the majority of the surface Navy then (and most likely today), I would do exactly the same thing.

[Lodesman]

Originally Posted by Mule

I had no idea what all would happen,

Is that so?
Didn't you say "This unrep was one of many I had done, far more than I could or can remember."?
Or what about: "I looked at the crew, and said, "You get that guys". I saw smiles and a lot of nods."?

You slipped a steel cable under tension, carrying a couple thousand pounds of hose and fuel - and you claim you didn't know what would happen. You're damn lucky you didn't kill someone.

I NEVER Did NOR WOULD I DISOBEY A DIRECT ORDER FROM AN OFFICER!I do what I am told. I followed orders.

Perhaps you've heard of My Lai?, or Nazi war crimes? How many soldiers have said exactly what you have to justify their unlawful acts?
The point is you're not required to follow an unlawful order. You were in charge of the evolution - not the supernumerary safety O. The BS you're spinning is a bald-faced cop-out and you know it.
And I know how the guys in the skimmers are treated, and I agree it ain't right, but it isn't an excuse either.

Cosmosmariner - ditto.

[cosmosmariner]

Originally Posted by Lodesman

So you caused tens of thousands of dollars in damages to two ships (what the heck, it's just taxpayers' money), dumped who knows how much DFO into the sea (hmmm, good for the fishies) and made your ship combat ineffective --- all in a petty attempt to show up some newbie. It wasn't the commission that set the officers apart - it was their sense of pride and professionalism.

For what it's worth, the vast majority of non-com's in the Canadian Navy are professionals who would never consider doing what you did.

Now if you want to go here, and you don't , start another thread in the Off topic area and call it The Rant. Disobeying a lawful order from a senior (officer or not) is punishable by, as a minimum, Non-Judicial Punishment aka a Captains Mast or by a Court Martial. Senior officers say "That's how officers learn". Start that thread somewhere else and I'll tell you how I was railroaded into a Captains Mast by officers and Non-Coms (confirmed by the Admin Chief when we both mustered out) who didn't like me and how I appealed to the Rear Admiral (Rembrant C. Robinson) and won. There are as many Machiavellians (and @_s holes in the services (of all countries) as there are in big business.

[cosmosmariner]

As a Radioman (RM) in the late '60s early '70s we used 1800 ft open reels of paper tape about an inch wide punched with 5 holes across the tape. Various combinations of holes equated to letters, numbers and characters. The messages we handled were punched out on these tapes as temp storage then burned after retransmission. The punch-outs or 'chad' got messy so they invented 'chadless tape' that only punched a semi-circle. As the tape reels ran out they were dyed sometimes red sometimes green sometimes yellow as a warning. Red Green And yellow were also coincidently used as security classifications Red top secret, yellow secret, green confidental. We used to put two colored pieces together then run them through a teletype machine and the chadless effect would hinge them together. We would then send newbies after 'Secret/Confidential tape'.

[sctpc]

Lodesman you have said your peace now just enjoy the rest of the thread its a good read and I don't want it closed.

[David M]

Originally Posted by sctpc

Lodesman you have said your peace now just enjoy the rest of the thread its a good read and I don't want it closed.

You are exactly right sctpc. Please gentlemen, play nice.

[cosmosmariner]

One duty station was NAVCOMSTA GUAM. Six of us were taking a commercial flight from Guam to CA with one stopover but not a plane change in Honolulu. We were flying 'international' so drinks were $.50 USD and we started drinking Mai Tais as soon as the wheels were up. By the time we got to Hono we were pretty loose. The layover was an hour and they weren't serving while on the ground so we left the plane and headed for the piano bar in the terminal. We of course ordered Mai Tais. Eventually someone asked us if we had a plane to catch and we hustled back to the gate. There was no jetway and the plane was sitting about 50 yds from the gate. The boarding stairs were still positioned at the door of the plane. The gate attendent said we were 30 minutes late and the plane couldn't take off without us. The July sun was really bright as we ran to the plane and the head stew was doing a Tonto with her left hand and waving us on to hurry up with her right. She glared at us and said in a very stern and even tone, 'Get...on...board!' We took our seats and the plane took off. The head stew came around and told us that they had a minor fueling hitch so we only held the plane up about 10 minutes. We breathed a little easier and ordered more Mai Tais.

[SkiprJohn]

Aloha Cosmos,
You probably noticed a : )
Welcome aboard and thanks very much for serving!
Chiefs, Officers and senior Petty Officers sometimes had incredible pressures put on them by seniors and especially while either in wartime or qualification times. I hope you can understand that sometimes it is the a--ho-- that comes out under pressure in some cases.
In my point of view, and I was in 30 years with 12 of that being Chief or senior there was never an occasion for me to be an a--ho-- except when there was a junior who would absolutely not act when directed to do so. That really got me going. I truly hope that in my time in that I helped more careers than hindered.
Regards,
Again, thanks for your service.
JohnL

[cosmosmariner]

Originally Posted by SkiprJohn

Aloha Cosmos,
You probably noticed a : )
Welcome aboard and thanks very much for serving!
Chiefs, Officers and senior Petty Officers sometimes had incredible pressures put on them by seniors and especially while either in wartime or qualification times. I hope you can understand that sometimes it is the a--ho-- that comes out under pressure in some cases.
In my point of view, and I was in 30 years with 12 of that being Chief or senior there was never an occasion for me to be an a--ho-- except when there was a junior who would absolutely not act when directed to do so. That really got me going. I truly hope that in my time in that I helped more careers than hindered.
Regards,
Again, thanks for your service.
JohnL

Thank you and welcome home! With your attitude I'm sure you were a positive force. Civvie or service it's always just a few that cause the problems. Sometimes they provide good stories though! In my 'coffee incident' when word got around some of the chiefs came to me individually and said that if there was a medal for it that I should get it. They thought he was a turd too!

[SkiprJohn]

Funny? Getting aboard Tiger Airlines aircraft with half the passengers carrying M-16s and the other half holstered .45s at their sides headed for Anchorage, Alaska having liftoff after spending 13 months in Vietnam. The funny part?
Flight crew announcing free drinks.
The other funny part, landing in Anchorage in shortsleeves after spending a year in the tropics.

Good times.

Regards,

JohnL

[cosmosmariner]

Originally Posted by SkiprJohn

Funny? Getting aboard Tiger Airlines aircraft with half the passengers carrying M-16s and the other half holstered .45s at their sides headed for Anchorage, Alaska having liftoff after spending 13 months in Vietnam. The funny part?
Flight crew announcing free drinks.
The other funny part, landing in Anchorage in shortsleeves after spending a year in the tropics.

Good times.

Regards,

JohnL

NCS Guam was one of the 'intermediate duty stations' for Marines returning from Nam. We had about 80 of them on base. The apparent reason for them being there was that they performed guard duty and perimeter patrols, armed of course. The latent reason for them being there was so they could be monitored as they 'transitioned back' to civilization. These were guys who had seen a lot of action. One night one of the Marines on perimeter patrol emptied a .45 at a ghost. Apparently he had heard the ghost story about the supposed 'White Lady' that haunted the base.

We stood quarters every morning and while waiting we noticed that one of the favorite pastime of these armed Marines was catching Geckos and smacking them in the jaw until they opened their mouths and angrily hissed. At this point they would put the tail of another Gecko into the mouth of the angry one and he would clamp down hard and not let go. This action was repeated until someone won by having the most Geckos by the time quarters was called. The competition ended with a swinging of the Gecko daisy chain and seeing whose chain could go the farthest when let go. These guys then picked up their weapons and fell in. A laugh riot let me tell you?!

[David M]

Originally Posted by cosmosmariner

We stood quarters every morning and while waiting we noticed that one of the favorite pastime of these armed Marines was catching Geckos and smacking them in the jaw until they opened their mouths and angrily hissed. At this point they would put the tail of another Gecko into the mouth of the angry one and he would clamp down hard and not let go. This action was repeated until someone won by having the most Geckos by the time quarters was called. The competition ended with a swinging of the Gecko daisy chain and seeing whose chain could go the farthest when let go. These guys then picked up their weapons and fell in. A laugh riot let me tell you?!

Oh gawd that's funny...I can just see it!

[mmckee1952]

I really glad that you two have shaken hands and remembered that this blog is to be about items and things that are funny. It's understandable that there times in our youth that we've all done things that in hind site we wouldn't even think about doing today, that's called matruity. I really enjoy reading this blogs, brings back a lot of fond memories, lets keep up the humorious work guys.

Mike
OSCS

[David_Old_Jersey]

Originally Posted by mmckee1952

I really enjoy reading this blogs

Me too Keep 'em coming guys

David
(Cub Scout -1975 for 3 longggg years - no badges awarded )
(Sea Scout - 1978 for 1 evening )