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Old 19-05-2009, 04:18   #1
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A Boat Is Better than a Wife, Because . . .

You've seen the T-shirts - a beer is better than a woman because, etc., etc.

I reckon it's time for "A boat is better than a wife because" variant.

I'm tired of being told that I spend more time on my boat than with "her", I spend more money on my boat than on "her", that I care more about my boat than "her", and that if I love my boat so much, I should marry it.

So I'd like to spell it out - a compilation of the best/funniest suggestions would be welcomed, finished shirts in sizes S-XXL to be made available at reasonable cost to all.

All in good taste, please, your creative contributions are requested.

BWS
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Old 19-05-2009, 04:40   #2
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lol common now thats just sad : (. lol

some say love keeps the boat afloat so when all the love is going into the wife we know were the boat is going v : )
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Old 19-05-2009, 05:08   #3
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Mine is old, slow, has problems with plumbing, needs constant attention and costs a huge amount of money - but I love her! The boat isn't bad either! Just joking!
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Old 19-05-2009, 06:08   #4
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Honey, I understand....

"I understand owning a boat is not a matter of life or death...It's far more important than that!"
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Old 19-05-2009, 06:48   #5
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...an old boat will still respond to a good helmsman
...it's cheaper to trade a boat for a newer boat!
...it's ok to let someone else sail your boat
...your boat won't bitch if you forget the purchase date

A humble start...
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Old 19-05-2009, 13:53   #6
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Ok, I'll give it a try:

- a boat is low maintenance (ahh, guess not)...
- a boat can't react suddenly and dangerously if mistreated (I'll try again)....
- some boats have gorgeous lines (still trying)....
- a good boat will respond instantly to a deft touch....

Wait a minute, boats aren't better - they are exactly the same!

Brad
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Old 19-05-2009, 13:53   #7
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..., because when I say it's over and time to move on, there' no argument!
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Old 19-05-2009, 13:56   #8
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I wouldn't trade in my wife for the QE2.
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Old 19-05-2009, 14:08   #9
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This was posted on the Compac site to help cheer up someone who had gone through a nasty divorce....
Why boats are better than your ex's
1.Your boat doesn't care if you look at another boat.
2. You can have as many boats as you can afford.
3. You can go off with another sailboat and crew, and when you come home your boat is still happy.
4. If you buy your boat new sails, she/he doesn't want more.
5. Your boat will not make dirty dishes and then leave them on your boat.
5. Your boat will always be a warm place to snuggle up to.
6. Your boats systems will always work as long as you maintain them occasionally.
7. For that matter, you boat is low maintenance.
8. Your boat will always be there when you get off work.
9. No matter how old the marina, you boat will never demand a different place to stay.
and most importantly...
10. Your boat will not spend your hard earned money on lawyers to stab you in the back.
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Old 19-05-2009, 14:10   #10
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Ditto that Dave. My wife loves being on the boat and is a good sailor to boot, nat'l champ and all that rot....

Quote:
Originally Posted by David M View Post
I wouldn't trade in my wife for the QE2.
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Old 24-05-2009, 04:42   #11
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Quote:
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I wouldn't trade in my wife for the QE2.
But a sailing boat is a different proposition. Nah, still nowhere near the exchange rate
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Old 24-05-2009, 06:46   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Southern Star View Post
Ok, I'll give it a try:

- a boat is low maintenance (ahh, guess not)...
- a boat can't react suddenly and dangerously if mistreated (I'll try again)....
- some boats have gorgeous lines (still trying)....
- a good boat will respond instantly to a deft touch....

Wait a minute, boats aren't better - they are exactly the same!

Brad

This is hte first thing that came to mind when I thought about it. There are way more similarities than differances. LOL Fun thread.
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Old 24-05-2009, 07:09   #13
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Looks more day by day that I will repalce my 59 year old wife with a 25+ year old boat, does that make her a trophy boat?

I would replace her (wife) with a new 38 IP but I doubt there will be enough left to do so...damn it.
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Old 25-05-2009, 02:14   #14
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Thank you for getting this project off to a great start!

"because you never have to deal with the question of whether the awlgrip makes her look too beamy"

Keep them coming!

BWS
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Old 25-05-2009, 06:19   #15
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A variant...I haven't figured out how to make the transition from dog to boat.

Who loves you?

Put your wife and your dog in the trunk of your car. Close the lid and wait an hour. Open the lid and see who is happy to see you.

Dick Pluta
AEGEA
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