- you can heat your home with a bic lighter.
- Everybody who works at the marina knows you on a first name basis.
- All of your neighbours have your cellphone number, but only call when they want a weather
report or for you to check on their boat.
- You've spent many early mornings standing in your underwear on the deck
of someone else's boat, adjusting halyards, lashing lines & freezing your butt off.
- Your wife has an endless list of reasons for why she must stay overnight at her best friend's house.
- You can walk your dock in the middle of the night faster than a blind man.
- You have to strap a bag full of water
to your boom & wait a few hours before you can take a shower
- Your bilge
contains more sawdust than water & you own a "plastic" boat.
- All of the "favourites" stored on your computer have something to do with boats.
- You have the greenest mooring
rodes in the marina.
- You know that styrofoam was invented by satan, duct tape by god.
- Everyone at the mall thinks you walk funny
- You feel at home in an earthquake.
- You no longer ask your co-workers if anyone wants to go sailing on the weekend.
- You spend weekends sitting in your cockpit
with a boat hook beside you, waiting to fend off the next rental boat operator.
- Everyone at the mall thinks your dog walks funny
- You believe every woman in a bikini should be wearing kneepads, & it isn't for "adult" reasons.
My favourite, so far, is the kid having "quiet time", though there have been many other funny anecdotes!