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Old 16-02-2015, 17:45   #196
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

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Hudson, ain't we lucky??!

Jim
I'd say you were

It's been very enlightening reading what you, Ann and the rest of the experienced cruisers have had to say on this thread. Thanks again for taking the time to share.

Jerry
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Old 16-02-2015, 18:01   #197
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

I was going to pipe up here for the cause of the boat ladies but I see the defense of the sisterhood is in good hands.

This is mostly my dream, I've been pushing for 12 years. It's not often I find other female types who are as gun-ho, but when we DO meet - lookout!- instant friendship. I imagine the same goes for women who are doing it mostly out of love - they want their partners to experience their dream. There's something very respectable about that, although it probably gets old pretty fast as the reality sinks in.

I can only admire the women who put their lives on hold to satisfy another's dream.
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Old 16-02-2015, 18:39   #198
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

A little story:

Our marriage vows were to love, honor, and cherish each other. Just that.

If you value your word and your honor, so that you want to keep the promise, you could just find yourselves trying to make it possible to hang in there through thick and thin. That's all. Perseverance plus caring.

Ann
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Old 17-02-2015, 05:44   #199
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

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....................
.................. That's all. Perseverance plus caring.
Ann
...... and joy!


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Old 17-02-2015, 06:39   #200
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

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...... and joy!


Love this picture. And I really enjoyed looking at your other pictures.
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Old 17-02-2015, 07:49   #201
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

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Our marriage vows were to love, honor, and cherish each other. Just that.
If you value your word and your honor
Ann

That is a very old fashioned way of thinking, one that I agree with as I value honor and duty very highly, but not a lot do anymore.

I often wonder when things turn bad as they almost always do if we live long enough if the plan now days is to just abandon your life partner just when they need you the most?
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Old 17-02-2015, 08:31   #202
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

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Originally Posted by Ann T. Cate View Post
A little story:

Our marriage vows were to love, honor, and cherish each other. Just that.

If you value your word and your honor, so that you want to keep the promise, you could just find yourselves trying to make it possible to hang in there through thick and thin. That's all. Perseverance plus caring.

Ann

There's an old joke that shows a couple sitting at a long formal dining room table in a richly ornated room in a lush mansion. The husband looks across the long table to his wife at the other end and says, "well, you've stuck with me thru thick".

I agree with your sentiment. Mrs Crazyoldboatguy & I have been married for 31 years and have enjoyed 24 years of wedded bliss.

Daniel McNeil
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Old 17-02-2015, 09:12   #203
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

At my parents last wedding anniversary together (57 years) I asked them

"What's the secret to a long marriage like yours?"

My father said (with a smirk) "Don't get divorced"

Simplistic as it seems I think it's one answer. We made a promise, let's keep it.
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Old 17-02-2015, 09:36   #204
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

I think one of the tricks to a couple sailing together for a long life is; don't read forums
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Old 17-02-2015, 09:51   #205
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

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I think one of the tricks to a couple sailing together for a long life is; don't read forums
Just curious.... If you dislike forums so much, and the helpful comments thoughtful members write on forums.... why do you participate?
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Old 17-02-2015, 10:02   #206
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

I'm going to take a contrarian point of view. Some people were not meant for each other and the best thing both of you can do for each other is to divorce. No amount of honor or loyalty will keep certain couples happy. Another point, as we meet more and more cruisers we have come to the conclusion that at least 75% of them are on their second marriage so my point of view is supported by stats. That said, its wonderful when you meet a couple that have been together for ever and still are each others best friends.
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Old 17-02-2015, 12:57   #207
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

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Just curious.... If you dislike forums so much, and the helpful comments thoughtful members write on forums.... why do you participate?
because otherwise you wouldn't have anyone to stalk
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Old 17-02-2015, 13:41   #208
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

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because otherwise you wouldn't have anyone to stalk

That looks like poking bears.
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Old 21-02-2015, 21:34   #209
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

Why to use the word quit?
If you are a Marathon runner, you do not quit running marathons, only you have to stop doing it since your body is not able to perform as required, you are not a quiter
If your personal relation with your wife/ husband is not strong at land why it should get better at sea, it may fell down either at sea or at land, at sea it may seem faster, but if you measure in hours spend together, you may get to a very similar number between hrs spend together at sea that at land, only that the frame time required at land will be longer to obtain the same hrs spend together
If you want to take your wife to the NFL monday night game with all your beer drinking friends each week, how long it would take to you wife to say enough, or the other way, if your wife wants to take you to the theater to see romantic movies every weeend, how long it will take you to say enough.
How can you pretend becoming a "full time cruiser" if you havent spend even a night passage together?
I think EXPECTATIONS is the main problem, followed by the lack of KNOWLEDGE of what it really is, and I'm not really sure how to say it in English, it should be a dream for both, not one following or trying to fullfill the expectations of the other one, normally she following him.
Health, family, money, cant been considered reasons for quiting cruising, they are circumstances that may make you quit what ever you are doing, that is life, you make plans knowing that they are only best wishes, and that you will have to change them as many times as neccesary to keep on following your dream
Some are dreamers, and that is enough for them, others are doers, and once they got it, began to deam a new dream (myself) and other are the ones that keep on going for most of their lives.
The only quiters I know are those who do not dream being afraid to fail.
So dream your dreams, make them hapen and enjoy the ride for the time it last
Sorry Englush is not my language
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Old 21-02-2015, 22:20   #210
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Re: Why Do Cruising Couples Quit

I think there are two different subjects getting mixed together:
- Those who have completed their cruising plans: Some only intended to do it for a couple years or are simply getting too old.
- Those who try it, don't like something about it and quit before they intended to.
- You could argue for a third group: Those who were happy cruising but find something else they like more.
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