Cruisers Forum
 


Join CruisersForum Today

Reply
 
Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 27-08-2013, 11:32   #1
Registered User
 
farmall.dude's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: South East Lower Michigan
Posts: 46
The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

Thought the title would intrigue enough people to get a decent number of looks at this post. This isn't about money. So, stop rolling your eyes and mumbling "Not another one" to yourself!
I'm a long way away from realizing our dream of cruising off into our retirement (10-15 years). So far, I've read tons of posts and blogs about what it costs to live aboard and cruise the islands. I've read posts about the weather and posts about many other issues that deal with daily life on a sailboat. The one thing I haven't found is an answer to the one big question we have about this lifestyle... How do you keep from getting Homesick? We'd both love to sail away to the islands for a couple years or so, but neither of us can imagine being away from our Grandkids for months at a time (maybe more). We thought about taking them with us, but their parents would object I'm sure! (Maybe not, since they'll be teenagers by then !)
How do you folks deal with not seeing your family? How often do you get to see them? How do you do it? I doubt my kids will be able to afford to fly down every couple months (time and money wise), and likewise we likely couldn't afford to fly back that often. What places do generally have the best flights back to the US? What about safe places to leave the boat for a couple weeks? I imagine it doesn't take criminals too long to figure out a boat is vacant.
All these questions... I bet you veterans hate us dreamers, don't you! LOL!
__________________

__________________
farmall.dude is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 11:42   #2
Senior Cruiser
 
Ocean Girl's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: In transit ( Texas to wherever the wind blows us)
Boat: Pacific Seacraft a Crealock 34
Posts: 4,115
Images: 2
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

We have no kids so no prob but we do have nephews and nieces that we adore. When my parents sailed RTW they picked up my oldest nephew ( 13 at the time) for a nice jaunt down the east coast of US. It was a great way to show him a life other than rich suburbia. Do not downplay the example you will make to your grand kids, living your life aboard and abroad.
__________________

__________________
Mrs. Rain Dog~Ocean Girl
https://raindogps34.wordpress.com
Ocean Girl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 11:53   #3
Registered User
 
Khagan1227's Avatar

Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Kansas City, MO
Boat: In the hunt again, unknown
Posts: 1,330
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

Quote:
Originally Posted by farmall.dude View Post
Thought the title would intrigue enough people to get a decent number of looks at this post. This isn't about money. So, stop rolling your eyes and mumbling "Not another one" to yourself!
I'm a long way away from realizing our dream of cruising off into our retirement (10-15 years). So far, I've read tons of posts and blogs about what it costs to live aboard and cruise the islands. I've read posts about the weather and posts about many other issues that deal with daily life on a sailboat. The one thing I haven't found is an answer to the one big question we have about this lifestyle... How do you keep from getting Homesick? We'd both love to sail away to the islands for a couple years or so, but neither of us can imagine being away from our Grandkids for months at a time (maybe more). We thought about taking them with us, but their parents would object I'm sure! (Maybe not, since they'll be teenagers by then !)
How do you folks deal with not seeing your family? How often do you get to see them? How do you do it? I doubt my kids will be able to afford to fly down every couple months (time and money wise), and likewise we likely couldn't afford to fly back that often. What places do generally have the best flights back to the US? What about safe places to leave the boat for a couple weeks? I imagine it doesn't take criminals too long to figure out a boat is vacant.
All these questions... I bet you veterans hate us dreamers, don't you! LOL!
Nice thing about boats, you can pull up the anchor and sail home if you get homesick.

This is even recommended if the islands are in the Caribbean, going to the states during hurricane season can be the right choice for you, and it will give you a few months to visit the family.
Khagan1227 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 12:04   #4
Senior Cruiser
 
Vasco's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Toronto
Boat: CS36Merlin, "La Belle Aurore" Ben393 "Breathless"
Posts: 7,130
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

A lot of Bahamas and Caribbean cruisers end up going home in the summer. It's best to have a home to come back to. Most don't cruise "forever". Some do it full time for a couple of years and then do the part-time thing.

Nowadays with the way communications are you're never out of touch. When the grandkids become teenagers they might visit for a winter vacation but when you get home I bet you'll seldom see them. They have their own world. In ten or fifteen years (your timeframe) they might have fled the coop and be miles away from you!

But if you'll miss your extended family that much maybe you should stay at home. Not being flippant, just that you will not enjoy cruising if you miss them that much.

We have Christmas in October (actually combined with Canadian Thanksgiving) and see them all. And that's it for six months or so. Sometimes they come to the Bahamas for a couple of weeks visit. Sometimes not.
__________________
Rick I
Toronto in summer, Bahamas in winter.
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/beneteau393/
Vasco is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 12:11   #5
Registered User
 
Dulcesuenos's Avatar

Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Florida Keys, Bahamas Bound
Boat: 38' French Cat
Posts: 2,828
Images: 4
Are you living your life for them? Or yourselves? Only you can decide. My own parents had me well informed id be on my own at 18. Therefore i have little sympathy for those who either cant kick the kids(more like adults) out or bear to leave them even if you only visit once a year etc.
Only you can decide, its a sacrifice, only you can decide if its one youre willing to make, that is before your too old to do it...
__________________
Dulcesuenos is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 12:14   #6
Registered User
 
Dulcesuenos's Avatar

Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Florida Keys, Bahamas Bound
Boat: 38' French Cat
Posts: 2,828
Images: 4
If your 10-15 years from retirement, i doubt your teenage grandkids will mind much lol
__________________
Dulcesuenos is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 13:48   #7
Don't ask if you can't handle it
 
sailorboy1's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: On the boat somewhere
Boat: Hunter 410
Posts: 12,305
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

the answer is pretty easy when you don't really care all that much for your family

on the other hand if your family likes you, they will come visit you instead of your having to go to them
__________________
jobless, houseless, clueless, living on a boat and cruising around somewhere
sailorboy1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 13:52   #8
Registered User
 
nwdiver's Avatar

Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Vancouver, BC
Boat: C&C Landfall 38
Posts: 357
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

What you kids wouldn't want a nice holiday at some warm island several times a year.................. bad kids
__________________
nwdiver is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 14:00   #9
֍֎֍֎֍֎֍֎֍֎

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 13,022
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

"How do you keep from getting Homesick?"
Easy: STAY HOME.

If your boat IS your home, you can stay home and sail away at the same time.

Boats and cruising have got nothing to do with homesick. If you want to travel, you travel. if you want to stay at home, stay at home. If you want your home to travel...you buy a boat, or an RV, or something more portable than the usual home.
__________________
hellosailor is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 15:10   #10
Senior Cruiser

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Nevada City. CA
Boat: Sceptre 41
Posts: 3,745
Images: 9
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

To set the table -- I have purchased a boat in Italy and have sailed the Med for the last three summers with my wife, our two children and two of their friends. The reason I chose to endure teenagers on a boat is that we live in a small town and when kids go away to college they don't come back b/c there are no jobs here.

Now with the table set -- We left on June 14, 1013 and the kids and wife went home on Aug 4, 2013. A friend flew in and we repositioned the boat. I arrived home on Aug 24, 2013. During that time I had a number of major family tragedies: 1) A close friend of the family died before I left. Funeral took place while I was gone, 2) Another family friend passed on and once again I could not attend the funeral, 3) my cousin's 12 y/o son passed away due to a tumor, 4) my brother OD'd (non fatal) on drugs, and 5) My bro in law tried to get himself signed on as Power of Attorney for my in laws. He had already depleted their account by $50k or more. Best I could do was write emails to the families.

There is a non financial cost to cruising that can't be calculated.
__________________
Fair Winds,

Charlie

Between us there was, as I have already said somewhere, the bond of the sea. Besides holding our hearts together through long periods of separation, it had the effect of making us tolerant of each other's yarns -- and even convictions. Heart of Darkness
Joseph Conrad
Charlie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 15:32   #11
Long Range Cruiser
 
MarkJ's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Australian living on "Sea Life" currently in England.
Boat: Beneteau 393 "Sea Life"
Posts: 12,828
Images: 25
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dulcesuenos View Post
Are you living your life for them? Or yourselves? ...
I have met many, many people who did not persue their cruising dreams because of children, grandchildren or parents. They whinge and moan about what could have been.

When you are at the Pearly Gates and someone asks you what you've done in the last ten years what are you going to say? Discovered the world? Or was an unpaid baby sitter?

Many cruising folks have the parent problem too... in this bay right now we have 2 diferent boats off seeing parents... one didnt make it; another is hanging in there. A third is about to shoot home for a 97th birthday. Cruising doesnt get easier.


Mark
__________________
Notes on a Circumnavigation.
OurLifeAtSea.com

Somalia Pirates and our Convoy
MarkJ is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 15:33   #12
Senior Cruiser

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: between the devil and the deep blue sea
Boat: a sailing boat
Posts: 17,314
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

Yep.

But if you arrange your things accordingly, nothing can get you, not even the taxman. (The other thing, yes).

We are only vulnerable to the extent we expose ourselves. We can only lose something we think we have.

I hope things will work out for you. A lesson is a lesson. Learn it well. Adjust. Survive.

All the best,
b.
__________________
barnakiel is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 15:53   #13
cruiser

Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Tampa Bay area
Boat: Hunter 31'
Posts: 5,731
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dulcesuenos View Post
Are you living your life for them? Or yourselves? Only you can decide. My own parents had me well informed id be on my own at 18. Therefore i have little sympathy for those who either cant kick the kids(more like adults) out or bear to leave them even if you only visit once a year etc.
Only you can decide, its a sacrifice, only you can decide if its one youre willing to make, that is before your too old to do it...

By "on your own," did they mean to never expect to see you again? I AM living for myself when I want to see my daughters. They are part of me, an amazing thing that I never could have predicted before I had them. I have TONS of sympathy for grown children and parents who can't get together often. It's a terrible loss; I know.

And, no matter how independent and completely grown up your children are, there will be times when they will need you. I think to put someone down for recognizing that they will miss their kids ... that's just cruel, I think.
__________________
Rakuflames is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 15:55   #14
o_q
Registered User
 
o_q's Avatar

Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 291
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

Kids are ANCHORS!
__________________
o_q is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 27-08-2013, 16:02   #15
cruiser

Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Tampa Bay area
Boat: Hunter 31'
Posts: 5,731
Re: The True Cost of Life Aboard? (not in $ ;) )

Quote:
Originally Posted by Don L View Post
the answer is pretty easy when you don't really care all that much for your family

on the other hand if your family likes you, they will come visit you instead of your having to go to them

But your younger generation, busy paying off college loans and the expenses of starting their own family, may well not have the money to come visit you in Bora Bora or Taiwan or wherever you've stopped on your circumnavigation.

As for looking back at the Pearly Gates about opportunities missed, along with sailing opportunities missed their might be regrets about family opportunities missed.

The person who will miss his offspring is no less of a sailor than the person who will not -- but depending on the circumstances, maybe less of a person.
__________________

__________________
Rakuflames is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:12.


Google+
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

ShowCase vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.