Single, Female, and living aboard?

[Stu Jackson]

Originally Posted by boatman61

I do know our religious nuts still head for the States.. more profitable..

Now ya tell me!

Oh, wait, I shoulda realized that was what started it all!

Can we send some back? Pleeeze...

[Hanksy]

Originally Posted by gamayun

It's questionable if she really has the interest. There aren't that many tools involved so that's probably not the problem. I was super motivated but it still took me a week to get up the nerve to start draining fluids on my Yanmar after watching the videos and reading the manual. I then replaced the belts, impeller and cleaned the heat exchanger. Never had worked on an engine in my life. I did screw up when reinstalling the gasket for the new exhaust manifold. It's in the back, hard to get to, and when I tightened the bolts, the gasket slipped. The diesel soot left a real mess on the engine. I'm not adverse to taking it to the diesel mechanic and watching them fix something so I can learn myself, but again, I am motivated to know my engine because rarely does anyone else who sails with me. Maintaining fluids and knowing how to bleed the engine seem like the most critical things, but if someone doesn't want to get their hands dirty or smell diesel fluid, it likely ain't gonna happen. But if you think she does, then just stsnd back and let her do it. Don't jump in unless she really needs help. Better yet, go grocery shopping while she works on it. She'll learn by doing, not watching you. What's the worse that can happen . This isn't a female thing BTW. I know plenty of male skippers who have zero interest in working on their own engines!

The gasket is exactly the sort of think I was thinking about. Easy mistake to make but once you've made the mistake and done a few of them you'll do it right every time.

I like Anne T's point about giving projects that are easy to finish successfully. I didn't think about the importance of feeling like she was successful.

She was with me yesterday when I was setting the timing on a Willys jeep. I think she took it all in!!

Thanks again for the replies

Sent from my HUAWEI SCL-L01 using Cruisers Sailing Forum mobile app

[zeehag]

there are at present 3 single females spending summer on board here in mazatlan. there are a few in la cruz and some in barra de navidad.
in general the women on boats sola donot mix well with others. folks know we are here and watch over us to make sure we donot need something we cannot do,. ha ha ha ha ha
HOWEVER, the attitude of the single male in board is not conducive with happiness and LIFE, as they are curmudgeons and grouches, with whom NO ONE will spend even one day much less eternity.
and so, guys, IFF you seek female companionship-work on your social skills, as yours are prolly social KILLS instead of skills.
bad attitude sends good women away and into their err our own world. see ye out here mebbe, if you have the balls to let off your lines.
one friend i met in a few places out here actually committed suicide due to extreme loneliness.
it seems men donot like to be alone, yet they dislike trying to be human enough to meet the women they so want to meet, but have not the attitude conducive with meeting.
oops
all they can manage is to bitch and gripe about women. wrong place to do this, if you actively seeking a mate, ye think??!!!
and yet the guys continue to bitch about our attitude-- fix yours, guys, mebbe you might meet someone interesting.
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
mebbe you guys dislike the idea we can manage without you in our lives--is that a surprising new concept, or just one with which you guys have no ability to grasp... seems we do more work on our boats than the males who are so bitchy about the uselessness of women on a boat ha ha ha ha ha

[Capt Phil]

Very true, Zee'... My guess is years of conditioning before going to sea makes one dependent on company. If you leave the land because of a lost love, social disinterest or any one of another dozen reasons, you may find solace and peace on the water. If you go seeking that peace because you can't find it shore side, you probably won't find it in the long run on your own at sea either.
Those who are naturally self sufficient tend to do well in my opinion. It doesn't matter if they are male or female, those comfortable in their own skin and have the desire to gain the skills to become self sufficient will do well... Others will turn into the curmudgeons you mentioned.
Just my opinion based on a number of years experience, mostly my own... Cheers, Phil

[Blue Crab]

Ah ... blissful solitude..

No woman = no constant gabbing. I can shut off the internet.

We are born alone and die alone. Only in between do we pretend to need others.

and it's always cheaper to rent.

[zeehag]

Originally Posted by Blue Crab

Ah ... blissful solitude..

No woman = no constant gabbing. I can shut off the internet.

We are born alone and die alone. Only in between do we pretend to need others.

and it's always cheaper to rent.

hay crabby. how ye doin?

males here in pair a dice who are actively seeking ladies to partner up with exhibit the negative attitudes of single males then wonder why they cannot find even a rental..ha ha ha ha ha
as i said previously--check your attitude, as that is your only blockade to finding that which you so verbally seek.
remember that about which you complain regarding females is is exactly that about which the females gripe-- usually when one gripes on someone's bad points, they are reflecting and projecting their own bad points into the relationsship withou t getting to know the individual with whom they are attempting --or not-- to allegedly get to know..
funny how men verbalize a desire to meet ladies yet act as if a woman is the worst thing to cross their path since the angry black cat of their youth and consequently have the unmitigated gall to think it is the woman who is the cause. this is called projection. research it.
might be a good idea for the misogynistic males who whine to begin a path of positivity instead of their negativity so blatantly exhibited.
i have always wondered why it is that men think women are driven to be with em, despite the desires of the woman to avoid that particular man. that has been called narcissism. leave that home.

[Hudson Force]

I can't find any surprises here.

There are those that cruise away to escape from society, failed relationships, disappointment with society and anger with their former experiences.

Then, there are those that cruise seeking adventure, beauty and excitement and find this within themselves and others.

'no mystery with their outcomes.

[HalfHitch]

Originally Posted by MarkJ

After the last few posts I don't think anyone is interested anymore in soul mates.




.

Not so, Mark! Life is better when shared and so is boating!

[zeehag]

those who cruise due to running from something seem to experience that which is labelled fail-- whether fail by self inflicted wounds or fail by retreat, or what ever the route taken, still spelled fail.
those who come out here to enjoy living generally are at peace. peace is a personal choice.
yes C H O I C E
we CHOOSE to fail, fly or die.
within our selves is this key.
that key is spelled C H O I C E.
it is very personal, so much so that most folks do not even know they hold this key.
excuses are made for the fails and arrogant basking seems to be the path followed after said fail. as fail is always someone else's fault, this basker in negativity is cozy and happy, yet verbalizes his displeasure with his own choices.
as an observing female, watching this abject negativity drives us away. we will never date you nor consider you appropriate sailing partner much less life partner. we may transiently accept you as acquaintances or casual friends, to be forgotten as life progresses.
the personal failure is often manifested in anger, as the individual is unable to deal with his losses.
and so what does any self respecting lady do in the face of these as only choices for sailing partners out here??
we avoid ye.
we continue to sail alone and stop seeking partners.
a guy has to be pretty exceptional anymore to be recognized as a potential for partnering. especially out here in waterworldville.
when ye shoot yourself in the foot, all ye get is blood. your own. and pain. your own.
is all a matter of choice--your own.
funny how so few people recognize this simple concept.
many of you males seem to hold a fear of strong women.
instead of seeing her as an aid, you see her as a threat. get over yourself and enjoy her strength and beauty.
remember that we women are strong as a result of will, determination, and having survived experiencing the likes of you.
you donot train your mate to achieve success, you train your self to accept the quirks and characters of others. you reach deep into your self and pullout the positivity and decency and all that is not the ugliness portrayed to others in your countenance, your actions and your words.
perhaps your present mate's inability to learn simple concepts of sailing might be related to your instructional techniques and reactions as opposed to responses to her meddling and intruding into your domain.
perhaps you might be able to successfully teach your lady to sail with more relaxed techniques.
how would you react or respond to your method of instruction?
treat others in the manner in which you would wish that person to treat you.

[goat]

On edit my smart-assed reply may have been taken as sexist, and so, deleted.

[Saleen411]

Originally Posted by HalfHitch

Not so, Mark! Life is better when shared and so is boating!

I always thought so....

Apparently A LOT of single single handers disagreed with me when I broached the subject awhile back.

[reed1v]

Originally Posted by zeehag

hay crabby. how ye doin?

males here in pair a dice who are actively seeking ladies to partner up with exhibit the negative attitudes of single males then wonder why they cannot find even a rental..ha ha ha ha ha
as i said previously--check your attitude, as that is your only blockade to finding that which you so verbally seek.
remember that about which you complain regarding females is is exactly that about which the females gripe-- usually when one gripes on someone's bad points, they are reflecting and projecting their own bad points into the relationsship withou t getting to know the individual with whom they are attempting --or not-- to allegedly get to know..
funny how men verbalize a desire to meet ladies yet act as if a woman is the worst thing to cross their path since the angry black cat of their youth and consequently have the unmitigated gall to think it is the woman who is the cause. this is called projection. research it.
might be a good idea for the misogynistic males who whine to begin a path of positivity instead of their negativity so blatantly exhibited.
i have always wondered why it is that men think women are driven to be with em, despite the desires of the woman to avoid that particular man. that has been called narcissism. leave that home.

There are low lives even in the boating world; or especially in the boating world. The best thing to do around trash is to get away from it. Which is why private clubs are the solution.

[Thomea]

I am mid 30s & hope to be living aboard sometime soon. I'll be sailing the east coast 2-4 weeks of September, then hopefully on the Med indefinitely after that. I dont know why more women wouldn't want to. Its amazing

[zeehag]

Originally Posted by reed1v

There are low lives even in the boating world; or especially in the boating world. The best thing to do around trash is to get away from it. Which is why private clubs are the solution.

ha ha ha ha ha. you aint cruisin are ye, or, you are cruising yot lubs. ha ha ha
when y'all are NOT in usa but are in paradise, try ENJOYING this life, not bitching about it as is being done here.
once you leave the swaddling and nannyness of usa then you will find life lots of different.
it is here where the cruisers find difficulty and bitch about their plight.
in usa cruising is hitting a different anchorage or marina for the night. hooters is just around the corner from you. ha ha ha.
you even have 1-900-findadate or wtf ......
ha ha ha. you even have POF and match dot com ...
y'all must be some SERIOUS losers to still be whining about your chosen plight.
no sympathy for YOU
you are as you CHOOSE to be, yet you spread your misery online in forums.

[gamayun]

Originally Posted by Hudson Force

Then, there are those that cruise seeking adventure, beauty and excitement and find this within themselves and others.

'no mystery with their outcomes.

Nicely said.

Both males and females can trace their history of attraction by a well worn, subconscious pattern or modus operandi, but they have to be paying close attention. Harder still is to break it, which is why we often see the same types hanging around