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Old 04-02-2011, 16:00   #106

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nice, but, of course it is in san diego...

Im not prepared to drive another 5-6 hours to look at one boat...

that last trip there was ok, i saw 6 boats and kinda like one of them for the money...

but the trip was painful... and i would rather be in pain on my way towards a definitive goal/end.

I wish i saw that boat above when i was down there, but, it is what it is.. i am getting used to missingout on boats/deals forever...

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Old 06-02-2011, 18:49   #107

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ok, i think i gotta take a shower... ewwwww....

I went out today with a 'broker'.. i didnt know he was a broker, i thought he was just a nice guy and was a kinda 'wannabe' broker... but, nope, full fledged...

nothing against brokers, (at least not at this point)

He actually wanted me to come down on friday afternoon, but too far to drive for an afternoon visit.. so i showed up today at 11am, and he is printing out stuff from craigslist, and

He grabs his phone and we take off in my car and drive all over Marina Del Rey.. the first boat, sold last week, he didnt even call ahead...

next two boats wont 'share' or CO-BROKER, so no good there and we left..

the next boat the owner or broker isnt there so he climbs over the fence and lets me in and we look at it from the outside..

what a waste...

we then go to lunch where i buy him lunch.. ????

After he calls his 'partner', and they are just now getting a listing of a boat, the lady is selling cause her hubby died and she is trying to get rid of the memory...

it's perfect for me, allegedly...

We look around for an hour as the lady doesnt know the slip number and his partner is using his dingy to try to locate it... omg.. MDR is huge.. so we wait and we walk, and we wait and we walk further from my car... (did i mention i dont walk well, and usually only walk and or go places when i have a destination??)

Anyways, we finally find the boat and the lady and its an ISLANDER 30 and it is ok.. nothing special.. but these guys are talking it up and how great it is...

so what if it's missing a headliner and all the wires are exposed.. .so what if all the cushions are soaked and the bilge is flooded... it has a radar... whoo hoooo????

and with a radar, I will need it.. and other boats will be able to see me and it transmits and it recieves...

I go WHAT? it transmits?? like it sends out epirb? or other boat info?

oh now. it sends out a radar wave and it bounces off and then recieves it.. oh.. geez.. guys.. really???

Its got a new motor.. only 2 years old... WOW.. really.. thats new???

the running rigging is freyd and yet is is great...

It has a new electrical panel, and that is worth $1500.. and so what if it doesnt have a shower, or pressure water, or hot water... hot water heaters are huge and they blow the circuit breaker to the dock power...


I felt so icky and just wanted to leave...

I was telling them about a US BOATs 30', that i saw last week for $6k, and it had all the stuff this boat had less the radar... and the bilge was dry and the paint was clean and shiny, and the cushions were dry and clean and newer... and it had pressure water, mascerator toilet, hot water... regreigerator, etc.

but that boat sails like a pig... i wont be happy...

If i am going to be racing, I wll hate it... *(I have no plans of racing in my boat ever...)

And i should pass up the cleaner boat, with less issues that is less then half the price so i can get this boat they just listed this hour...????

i dont think so...

during lunch the guy is telling me all the things i should look at in a boat.. and yet he didnt show me one thing... he didnt look at the shaft seal.. he didnt look at the deck around the step mast.. he didnt look at all except when i asked him about stuff then he looked..

I asked him about the keel bolts and he is looking around teh bilge and says after five minutes that oh yea, this boat dont have bolts.. the lead is placed and held in place by the fiberglass... to remove the keep and replace it you have to remove the fiberglass from teh deck down and place the keel and then relay the glass around the keel ballast... huh????

I am so confused and feel like i jsut left a used car lot...


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Old 06-02-2011, 19:30   #108
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A little exercise, fresh air, and looking at sittin on one's butt watching the Super Bowl! Surprised you could find a broker today.
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Old 06-02-2011, 20:03   #109
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Sorry but your story made me giggle .reminded me of the time I tried to buy a jeep and the salesman was telling me about the make up mirror ,blissfully unaware that I was not interested and telling him so. The only way he got the message was when I dived under the car to look at the underbody . I think they were still talking about me for a week hahhah

It is all experience Berg, painful in your case as you had to walk more than anticipated but it could have been a good one . You would have kicked yourself later.
We are all in the same boat. Be happy that not everyone is on your side.
Always bear in mind that I am total newbie .
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Old 06-02-2011, 20:52   #110

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yea, i am, with that, it's a good thiing...

I will know better to take some meds when i go out without a tru plan...

I can split a pill and should be ok to drive and stuff...I am getting a bit upset about small stuff. i know... but i am also getting upset about everything going on right now...16 more days and i am officially homeless... and daughterless...

it's funny/sad that wihtin the alst week or so she is acting more like a daughter then she has in the alst few years... although she is 'skirting' over the trust issue with her lies and stuff.. and it kinda sucks that i can not be honest/open with her about my plans... as i know she will tell everyone i dont want to know...

Anyways, before i go off on a tangent, (too late?), i will shut up and patiently go thru this process and hope to land right side up
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Old 07-02-2011, 04:42   #111
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Old 07-02-2011, 04:55   #112
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Originally Posted by joey69 View Post
$6K and ..."Needs work to be put into sailing condition. Needs new engine and rigging work."

I would
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Old 07-02-2011, 05:06   #113
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Berg.... your approaching the 'new life' in much the same way as you lived the old one it seems to me... you want things available where you want them to be but 'Waterworld' don't work like that...
There's great boats around but you gotta go to them... they're 'deals' because they're in outa the way places...
The only stuff your gonna find on the 'Golden Coast' are worn out abused old tubs... pretty much like the humanity occupying the loungers on the beach... nothing but baggage and problems...
Its like trying to buy a cheap boat on the Sth coast UK.... 95% of them will be other peoples FU's that they want to dump... but the good thing is there's allways some other starry eyed dreamer to take your disaster of your hands...
Either raise your budget or look elsewhere.... Florida's full of crap...
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Old 07-02-2011, 13:48   #114

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yes, i understand a lot of that... But, i also understand there are a few 'gems' out there... jsut like here... just like everywhere...

Yes, i see a lot of my traits carrying on, and yes, i want to chang ea lot of them and hope that i am, maybe not as fast i would like but they are changing, i hope...

I never could understand why i would drive from my hometown to another town to work when someone from another town would be driving to my town to work...

I am 'changing' in one aspect, in that i i usually want what i want and i want it now... I am sure that i am not in a rush, although i bemoan the process to be over, i am not wiling or wanting to just buy something... because it is convenient and or the price is right...

I amsure that what i think is a clean boat and a good boat is someone elses FU... and i am hopeful that i will find 'comprable' boats in Florida as well, because there are folks in financial troubles there just like here...

the buccuneer in San Diego is a good example ... not the best boat out there, some call her pig, but if i could find one like her in florida, then i will be happy..

what will be 'upsetting' is if there are no boats like that in that price range, ever... If i have to wait till winter of this year, then so be it.. I will spend the time hanging out on the docks and taking whatever lessons... And bitch all the way thru it...

some things never change... heheheh
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Old 07-02-2011, 13:50   #115

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Originally Posted by Doodles View Post
$6K and ..."Needs work to be put into sailing condition. Needs new engine and rigging work."

I would
Yes, i saw this and figured $6k for a used engine, and $1500 for rigging...and Another $3k for whatever...

so yea... for this price i can get a Buccaneer that is sound and ready to sail but on the wrong coast...

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Old 07-02-2011, 14:06   #116

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and oh, my budget is still the same.. $15k for a boat... what i looked at yesterday was $14k, but it was missing a head liner, had no pressure water, no hot water...

if the boat had a finished roofdeck, i wouldnt care about the headliner but as it was, it was all rough exposed raw unfinished fiberglass...

For $15k, i would hope to find a relatively clean, finhshed, (maybe old), but in overall good condition 30 ft boat..

this broker yesterday was a puke... showed me one boat.. and has called me threee times today asking if i would 'throw out an offer of $14k...

excuse me? it is listed for 14k, i might offer $9k, but he already told me the boat 'should have been listed for $17k, and that the owner will only go down to $14k...

blah blah blah...

scummy broker double talk thinking I would offer to buy the first boat he shows... and he just signed the 'listing agreement' yesterday afternoon...

must be nice to think you can sell a boat within 12 hours of getting a listing.. fairly optimistic in this economy as far as i am concerned...

anywasy.. i am just being grumpy/moody..

I got final report from my mri, myelogram today, and they are suggesting spinal fusion #4...

I asked why it took 13 months and that i wont be here for surgery, nor will I have a support system in place for recovery...

anyways. glad to hear a definitive answer...but aas usual, timing sucks...

I guess it will be about 6 months before i canthink about having surgery and having a place for support/recovery...I am hoping my mris and studys will not be too old andor need to be redone by then...
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Old 10-02-2011, 12:43   #117

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not that anyone truly cares, but i am not doing so well today...

I hate my house that i am in.. I want to leave now...

I miss my daughter, and dont want to leave her behind...

She finally kinda admitted that she dont want me to leave, and how she wishes we could be togeteher and how she will do everything right, and so on...

so, i am a wreck... things are in place... commitments made, promises made, and history has taught me... and all the 'logical' stuff.. but, i am sick...

I dont want to leave her.. She has not been the best daughter... but she hasnt beent he worst... She has played her mom and me for a long time adn things are the way they are...

I have wanted and expected her to help take care of me.. but that isnt a reasonable expectation.. at least it isnt aa long term reasonable expectation...

And now, i have to admit that i didn't do the best job in raising her.. I have enabled her and taught her the wrong lessons as far as priorities and respect...

she is more lazy then anything i can imagine.. she wants and wants and isnt willing to do much for it.. and now, she is paying the price...

she wants me to be around so i can continue to give her money when she needs and wants, while ignoring anytng i may need or want...She now lives 10 minutes away, but selfom comes by.. maybe once a week, and that is by appointment and for a short/set amount of she can come and then go on with her fun life...

lots and lots of things/issues.. all of which make me regret . and i hate regretting...

I kinda look at this move as a tough love kinda effort as she is now making choices, (albeit unknowingly), and dealing with the consequences...

I reassured her that we will have the same relationship as we do now... she calls me once a week, maybe, and she texts me 1-2 times a week.

we can still have that no matter where i live.. ... but if she wants more of a relationship, she will need to show me... stop ignoring me.. stop being bored over there, while i am bored over here... and lets find something to do together.. ...

I also reminded her that she should be looking for work... she filled our a few applcations last week, but nothing this week... she counted on one of these applcations to call her and hire her by now... so, instead of filling out more applications she is waiting by the fone.. for either a call back or to find out if she will get more hours at her current job.. (she averages 12 hours a week...

She was never a good student.. lots of D's, and some F's... and never any homework. but lots of time for texting, chatting, myspace, etc...

anyways, we spent almost an hour on the phone, (after i told her i hate talking on the phone about this stuff and would rather do this in person).. and I have spent half of that time crying, as i know there is nothing that can be done to stop my losing my home and my inability to afford to live in this area...

the wheels have been in motion since early 09 when she blew me off over the 08-09 holiday season and my birthday, and were confirmed when she blew me off for the '10 holiday season as well...

I have no idea what is right anymore... I have been in auto pilot for the last 5 months... and cant wait for this process to be over.. hoping the next setup is better, less effort, less stress, etc...

I assured her that she is welcome to visit me anytime.. she is welcome to move in with me anytime. and that i would give her anything she NEEDED.. not wanted..if she wants stuff above the basics she would need to work, and or help me out like she was supposed to do when she was a kid..

basically, nothing has changed.. she wants, and expects it to fall into her lap... and the last 3 years i have taken away perks and money as she is / has been doing less for and around the camp house...

anyways, i was surprised she admitted that she doesn't want me to go... and I was upset that i do have to go...

i effing hate this process... i really do... i want to be happy,and i want my daughter to be happy, and i want her to be independent, and or at least be able to afford the things she wants so she doesn't end up like me in 40 years... or so

anyways, kinda like i said last nite... i am just sitting here and waiting.. waiting for the clock to run down on my time here in this house and then i am on the road...
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Old 10-02-2011, 12:58   #118
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Berg, sounds like you have an average normal daughter.......And an average normal life...Don't take this the wrong way but sounds like pretty normal stuff. Nothing to be depressed about.
Happy thoughts.......happy thoughts....
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Old 10-02-2011, 13:42   #119

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yea, i can understand that.. and for discussin lets just assume that... although i think she is a little 'behind'..i.e. acting more like a 14 year old then an 18 year old...

(keep in mind, i raised her.. I was custodial parent... she only saw her mom mayb 4-6 times a month...and only in the last year or so has she 'flown the nest', back to her mothers 'because' I have too many rules, and she is constantly grounded...)

anyways.. it isnt easy to just watch children screw up.. I know she will fall/stumble a few times on her way out of the nest, and now, i wont be here to help...

she has already called me up to ask for $5 for gas to get home from work as her car is sucking fumes...(after she hasnt spoken to me in months, and hasnt checked in on me either)

she tells me she will pay me back as soon as her first check comes in... only to find out she cant cash her first check cause her mother wont help her open a bank account... so, i end up going with her and standing behind her as she speaks with bank reps, and answer the misc question she cant..

and to find out she needs to have an opening balance worth twice what her check is worth... and then to give her that money to open her account, again with the promise to pay her back..

but again, to ge forgotten about for months while she spends the money she borrowed for gas, and the beginning balance on junk...

typical issues.. but issues that are repeating and ongoing and no sign of slowing down,

i dont fear being paid back.. it's not the money.. it is the fact that I am sure she will be in a bad position without help when she needs it most...

oh well.. i will hope and pray that she survives and do i hope that i survive and learn...
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Old 10-02-2011, 13:47   #120
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Spinal fusion...and sailing

This is way off sailing, but loosely related! Berg I have followed your threads for some time now. I have also had back problems in the past. I can remeber very vividly the pain and range of emotions brought on by it. Hoplessness being the biggy. I thought I was done. That combined with the endless amounts of pain killers in order to survive the pain puts you out of your right mind. percaset, oxycotin, codone, morphine, steriod shots, spinal blocks, had em all, 3 years ago I could not stand for more than 15 min, could not sit for more than 15 min, and sleep was a painful but bareable experience. I suffered for years (like 10) and it finally built to a point where I could simply no longer function...the weight had crept up to over 220 lbs. I finally had back surgery and fused L5/S1. I awoke from that operation a changed man. No pain..recovery was about 6 months. I now weigh about 185, 5ft 11 and can run and jog and lift and sleep and whatever I want with no pain. It is amazing.. you need to do nothing but get your back fixed. A boat will make your back worse. Before I had the operation i would go out on my boat and by the end of the weekend i would be bed ridden. The motion of a rocking boat flexes all sorts of back muscles that you probably don't have or have not used in years! Which is then transfered right to your spine. Fix your back pain and drug free for about 6 months and then make decisions...your options will expand a thousand fold. If you don't have insurance or can't afford the operation go to the emergency room and refuse to leave until they fix it. (I paid enough for mine and yours probably) Refuse pain meds until you can have the back fixed, they are not a solution just a patch. I know I was at that point when I finally had my back fixed, I could do nothing but suffer in pain because the pain killers/steriods/spinal shots had all finally stopped working. Your daughter is not your problem, your back is. You have a pain free life out there, you must aquire it alone, then make decisions about the rest of your family. After my operation I would walk as far as they would let me everyday, stopped taking pain meds the next week, suffered through withdrawl for a month! Celebrex is a great nsaid, thank goodness for it. I only took it for another 2 months then nothing... I ran 13 miles the other day! Once you have a solid back then think about a sailboat, you will be able to enjoy it, because if your back is as bad as mine was, a sailboat will only increase your suffering both physically and financially. The last thing you want to do is buy a boat only to find that it is unbearable for you to live in because of the back! Sorry for the sermon, but I been there and hope this might save you another minute of that pain.

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