Most frequent lie encountered while cruising

[arbanais]

Hilarious thread ! (Not a lie)

Sent from my LG-K350 using Cruisers Sailing Forum mobile app

[Be Free]

Originally Posted by jkindredpdx

... My Ex-wife had an equation where she doubled my estimate and added a half hour! Came in amazingly close.

Back when I was writing computer programs for a living I used to tell new programmers to come up with their best estimate of how long a project would take then double it and change to the next unit of time. That meant that a two hour project would take four days and a one week project would take two months. I was (mostly) joking but it was often disturbingly accurate.

Now, to get back on topic: Weekend guests on a small boat - "I don't snore".

[Adelie]

Originally Posted by TooCoys

I don't know about other marinas, or other harbor patrol staff, but I can tell you that I personally DO walk every dock in our marina at LEAST once a shift.



When walking the docks I check waterlines first to make sure a boat isn't taking on water, then I check cleats and docklines, and then I check shore power and water connections.



I also listen for any alarms going off inside boats (found two already), or anything that looks like its been tampered with. And at the beginning or end of every dock, I check the bathrooms to make sure that all lights are working, all toilets are clean and flushed, the water is running, and the hand dryers work.

Since this is a thread about lies, I assume your whole post was a crock. 😁


A house is but a boat so poorly built and so firmly run aground you would never try to refloat it.

[Sea Dreaming]

And at the beginning or end of every dock, I check the bathrooms to make sure that all lights are working, all toilets are clean and flushed, the water is running, and the hand dryers work.

Toocoys...you didn't mention TP. I assume you tell clients "yes, we have bidets"

[Skeezix]

Sidebar on motion sickness ...
If I understand correctly, inner ear balance mechanism is one of the first affected by common natural poisons. So if what it tells the brain is different from what other systems say, especially vision, brain says "uh oh, poison, empty stomach now". Probably also true if balance is overwhelmed at all.

It is reliable information; I saw it on an internet forum.

[teddythetwig]

Originally Posted by a64pilot

Ten minutes later, I find it in my pocket, but not until after I get up and scratch around and find the other one I have, usually a tool.

That or a beer

[reed1v]

Originally Posted by Skeezix

Sidebar on motion sickness ...
If I understand correctly, inner ear balance mechanism is one of the first affected by common natural poisons. So if what it tells the brain is different from what other systems say, especially vision, brain says "uh oh, poison, empty stomach now". Probably also true if balance is overwhelmed at all.

It is reliable information; I saw it on an internet forum.

Food poisoning seldom affects balance, even the deadly kind. Chemical poisons may affect the central nervous system which can cause the brain to misprocess a lot of incoming sensory experiences(common with popular street drugs). So all depends on the poison. If the poison is bacterial or viral, then muscle spasms usually get one to heave up the offending item. Seasickness is an ear issue, not a tummy issue per se; although the tummy seems to want to make its displeasure felt.

[SV DestinyAscen]

Originally Posted by reed1v

Food poisoning seldom affects balance, even the deadly kind. Chemical poisons may affect the central nervous system which can cause the brain to misprocess a lot of incoming sensory experiences(common with popular street drugs). So all depends on the poison. If the poison is bacterial or viral, then muscle spasms usually get one to heave up the offending item. Seasickness is an ear issue, not a tummy issue per se; although the tummy seems to want to make its displeasure felt.

I've had my share of food poisoning and basically loss of balance is almost always that awkward time when I'm alternating between making sacrifices to the porcelain God via various ways and trying not to pass out.

[sck5]

That guy lying about the wifi isnt really lying. HE is sitting in the marina office where the signal originates. YOU will be sitting in your boat out on the docks. It is no wonder that HE gets a decent signal and YOU dont.

[sailorboy1]

The last 2 months of cruising to me the biggest lie is whenever the cruising guidebook says how great a place is when in fact there isn't anything worth doing there.

The wifi lie is a confusing one. Yes they have wifi, it just has has a crappy internet connection.