liveaboards - When do you Tell Friends and Family?

[In Training]

Most can't imagine that anyone would want to live on a boat -- they haven't seen how nice the boats are now. Things have changed a lot in the last 30-40 years.
So you will get that. They don't consider the travel angle of it and that you won't be sitting in the same place for months at a time.


Then depending on your age, you will be told that you are too old to do it. They realize others do it, but they must be much younger.

Then you will get that others that do it probably don't have any family.

The people that don't respond, just figure you're crazy.

[JanetGroene]

We had to tell some fibs to neighbors when we put the house up for sale, sold a lot of stuff and moved to a small, partially furnished apartment. There is also the problem of giving notice at work and making a friendly transition in case you want to come crawling back. Friends and families should accept your choices but it's more delicate to manage business such as real estate and employment.

[Rakuflames]

i did not tell people until literally days before I moved aboard. That restricted a lot of heated "WHY?????" from sister and daughters, and rapidly turned it to "HOW will you ...?"

My situation was complicated by the fact that I was 64 at the time and some people imagined all sorts of dire consequences, but I focused on the "how" questions in a positive way.

[johntyler]

The book to buy [with all the answers] is: Sell up and Sail Away by Bill and Laurel Cooper. Pub. Adlard Coles Nautical. Latest edition [2012 Oct] is 5th edition. £20 UK. [Or just do it!].
Good luck anyway
John
Nic 38

[Seastream]

We just got a contract on our house so, live aboard we shall be as we will very soon be homeless I can't wait!!!!

[Seaworthy Lass]

Originally Posted by Seastream

We just got a contract on our house so, live aboard we shall be as we will very soon be homeless I can't wait!!!!

Congratulations Seastream. So exciting isn't it!
Welcome to the forum too.

[oldragbaggers]

Originally Posted by Seastream

We just got a contract on our house so, live aboard we shall be as we will very soon be homeless I can't wait!!!!

So happy for you. (And more than just a little envious.)

That will be the next most exciting day of our lives as we have spent the last 5 years wondering if we will ever be able to sell at all.

[Seaworthy Lass]

Originally Posted by oldragbaggers

......That will be the next most exciting day of our lives as we have spent the last 5 years wondering if we will ever be able to sell at all.

Hi Becky, I have been following your posts, nice to meet you!
Best of luck with making your dreams a reality.
The last five years on the water have been the best years of my life so far (and that is saying a lot as I had a good life beforehand).

[Captain Jeffry]

Originally Posted by foolishsailor

There is a saying in the cruising community:

10% of all the people who say they are going to buy a boat, do

10% of people who own a boat use it

10% of people who use a boat actually cruise

10% of people who cruise leave their country

10% of people who are cruising cross an ocean

10% of people who cross an ocean go RTW

The reason for this? The dream rarely matches the reality. Sailing, living aboard and cruising is really hard, much harder than living on dirt. S much so that it can shock many people. Is it worth it, of course if it is what you want.

My point? Maybe buy the boat first before you tell anyone your plans. Owning a boat for a couple months will let you know how far you want to take it.

Concur completely! Really good advise! Plus, the boat you buy may need many months of work either with new gear or repairs. Make the final plans when you are a few months from dropping lines and heading out.

[chuckr]

one story and how we do it

first the story -our 2nd year out we were in Maine after going thru the northern bahamas and up the east coast - we had invited another boat that we were cruising with to join us for a sundowner - this was their 1st time out - they told us they were going to do a circum nav and wanted us to go with them - they had a great boat to do it but we declined as i did not think we wanted to do that or were ready - long and short we spent another 18mos getting the boat and ourselves ready and when we were off central we ran across them - they were headed back to the usa to sell the boat and get an rv - no idea why as we did not ask and it must have been very hard for them to tell us that much

for us - we may or may not cross the pond this year or ever - people know we are looking at it and doing some planning - are we going? right now i have no idea and i have probably said too much already

we tell folks we will not know until it is time go as our plans are written in the sand at low tide

just our thoughts and opinions
chuck patty and svsoulmates
in trinidad for hurricane season

[Captain Jeffry]

Originally Posted by chuckr

one story and how we do it

first the story -our 2nd year out we were in Maine after going thru the northern bahamas and up the east coast - we had invited another boat that we were cruising with to join us for a sundowner - this was their 1st time out - they told us they were going to do a circum nav and wanted us to go with them - they had a great boat to do it but we declined as i did not think we wanted to do that or were ready - long and short we spent another 18mos getting the boat and ourselves ready and when we were off central we ran across them - they were headed back to the usa to sell the boat and get an rv - no idea why as we did not ask and it must have been very hard for them to tell us that much

for us - we may or may not cross the pond this year or ever - people know we are looking at it and doing some planning - are we going? right now i have no idea and i have probably said too much already

we tell folks we will not know until it is time go as our plans are written in the sand at low tide

just our thoughts and opinions
chuck patty and svsoulmates
in trinidad for hurricane season

have delivered many a boats to Cabo and beyond, with not only new boat owners, but really new sailors as well. I estimate that about 50% of the couples with this formula, quickly realize this is not like the brochure and sell the boat which had been over rigged and outfitted to the max with electronic and mechanical gear they were never going to use properly. whew.. A few, I have learned, led to divorce...

[zeehag]

ok now, here is how you really do it---
wait until a great huge named behemoth of a storm comes along.
day before it hits, say--"hay, that is where i live now!! right under that tiny circle, there...."
run......
buy and activate spot and punch it a few times while sitting at dock or going to post office or somewhere, and let them see you are findable,most of the time,,,some times??? oh well........
run....
faster....!....

[barnakiel]

There is, for good and for bad, no such thing as 'family' or 'friends' that one could apply any universal 'wisdom' and then act accordingly.

Some family members / friends are like this, others like that, some will be supportive and say: 'oh, you go? have fun!, how can I help?' and others will say: 'how could you? to leave me here, alone, old and DYING!!!' ;-)

Do as you judge them and then proceed on your way. You are not 15 y.o. and you do not have to explain, justify, and te cera. Unless you are ;-)

Cheers,
b.

[bobconnie]

Everythings up to YOU !! Ya only live ONCE period! Do what your heart tells ya not what your friends and relitives try to tell ya !! Connie and I tryed to explain things to our friends and folks, but they just winked and thought we would never finish our boat and sail away! Boy were they wrong !LOL Now many many years later they are still sayin stuff !! " but Bob your OLD and all that !LOL" Well It did not stop us then, and it's not stopping us NOW!! It's a great life, not an easy one but very fulfilling one !! We have been happy cruising and living aboard for over 30 yrs !! And just bought a new to us boat to go back to cruising for as long as things are still exciteing to us!! Have a good life aboard and we hope you have as much Joy as we have had !!

[jaxfishgyd]

All my family and friends were surprised on how long we lived on land....
Boating and fishing has been my whole life.....My first date with my wife, I took her fishing...why have a 2nd date if she didn't like that....
But it wasn't till 2000 when the kids were gone that the wife said "it's time" so we sold the house and bought the boat. I was 49 and the admiral was 45....
All of us who are liveaboards are doing something 97.785 % of all people dream of doing... "living their dreams".....