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Old 27-03-2015, 19:32   #1
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Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

Hi, I've been reading the threads on this forum and I find it fascinating how people come together and share their stories. However I have noticed that not much is said about gay life while cruising. So, I want to start this topic for those who would like to share and those that would like to learn what it's like being gay and living in the vast open blue ocean.

Please note that this topic is not about ones sex escapades, but the experiences of gay cruisers, being sailers or power boater, while adventuring the coast, the islands or the world.

What have you experience while cruising?
Please share the good, the bad and the ugly.

Also, this topic is not restricted to only gay people, our straight brethren are also welcomed.

Lastly, please refrain from posting crew wanted adds, this is not the place for this.

Respectfully yours

Varlan
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Old 27-03-2015, 20:05   #2
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

gay , straight or indifferent,cruisers are probably the most open minded and tolerant family on the planet,welcome to the forum.
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Old 27-03-2015, 20:17   #3
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pirate Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

Greetings and Welcome to CF Varlan..
Junior Cruiser huh..!!
Good choice of rating..
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Old 27-03-2015, 21:21   #4
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

I think you'll find cruisers are little different from any other segment of society. When we had our boat in a boatyard for a while doing some work a few years back, there was a transexual lady who suffered some discrimination but also made a lot of friends. The wife and I befriended her and helped her out with her boat on occasion and we still bump into her now and again. To me, it seemed the younger people in the yard weren't really that concerned whilst some of the older were definitely discriminatory.

My step daughter is also openly gay (and she's definitely urban metrosexual and never likely to become a cruiser) and her experiences, I would say, would be pretty much the same. Is that your take?
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Old 27-03-2015, 21:37   #5
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

Hi Varlan and welcome to the forum.

Like reefmagnet, I find cruisers are pretty much a cross section of society. Since it tends to be an expensive lifestyle cruisers on average represent a higher level on the socio-economic ladder so perhaps a little more open minded than society in general but you will certainly encounter all kinds.
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Old 27-03-2015, 21:52   #6
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

I notice you've been lurking for awhile. I did, too, before joining and opining. I have learned much here. Chime in with your questions and comments. It's a group that can be rough and raw at times but, in general, I find the folks here sincere in their desire to help others.

Do you have a vessel? Where do you cruise?

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Old 27-03-2015, 22:03   #7
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

Straight up from an old salt.. Why is it that When someone is "Gay" it seems they need some type of recognition in approval of who they are.. I dont give a damn what your sexual orientation is, or who or what you play with on your own time in your own place.
I've never met a straight person who would ask a question as the OP did..
And Its Bull to expect to be treated any different than any one else..
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Old 27-03-2015, 22:35   #8
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

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Originally Posted by Randyonr3 View Post
Straight up from an old salt.. Why is it that When someone is "Gay" it seems they need some type of recognition in approval of who they are.. I dont give a damn what your sexual orientation is, or who or what you play with on your own time in your own place.
I've never met a straight person who would ask a question as the OP did..
And Its Bull to expect to be treated any different than any one else..
wow that was fast.

Didn't notice the OP asking for 'recognition', 'approval', or to be 'treated any different than anyone else.'

And I've seen many threads here that are of the format 'I'm (some group they identify with), anyone else (that group)? Let's talk about stuff from (that group's) perspective.' Much like this one.

But when (some group) is 'diabetic', or 'new to boating', or 'Canadian', I suspect you don't jump on the thread and make a vitriolic post like this.
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Old 27-03-2015, 22:39   #9
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

Well, you know. Like it or lump it gay people are subject to discrimination in society no matter how politically correct everyone pretends to be. Aside from sexuality they are no different from us "straights" ranging all the way from horribly obnoxious and best avoided to fun to be around.

It just strikes me that the OP is simply interested in hearing about attitudes in general to gay people on the cruising scene. I don't think they're self promoting or recruiting batters for their team in any way.
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Old 27-03-2015, 23:12   #10
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

Hi Varlan and welcome
There are many gay cruisers out there, and there are probably problems that gay cruisers encounter that other groups dont, Though no one I have met yet have mentioned any
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Old 27-03-2015, 23:15   #11
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

Over the last 20-years I've been a guest on hundreds of cruising boats and have had hundreds of others visit our boat. I've spent countless hours drinking beer and coffee with those folks and I can not remember the topic of sexual orientation ever coming up.

I know quite a few of the couples were same sex partners yet never once did anyone find it necessary to discuss sexual orientation.

Likewise no one discussed the fact that some folks were:

- old grumpy single men who had no social skills
- one couple was a wealthy german codger with a very young and beautiful barbie partnere
- two guys were retired military with severe PTSD problems
- many couples were un-married cohabitating fornicators
- several couples were born again christians

As others have said - No One cares where you came from, why you are there, or what your particular predilections might be. Most cruisers don't know and don't care about your last name - I am Jerry from Mirador and I can't remember ever providing much more detail than that.

The cruising community cares about the here and now, who has good beer, who has good water, and most important who has good movies.

The rest of shoreside life is pretty much ignored.

Welcome aboard!
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Old 27-03-2015, 23:23   #12
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

Quote:
Originally Posted by TacomaSailor View Post
Over the last 20-years I've been a guest on hundreds of cruising boats and have had hundreds of others visit our boat. I've spent countless hours drinking beer and coffee with those folks and I can not remember the topic of sexual orientation ever coming up.

I know quite a few of the couples were same sex partners yet never once did anyone find it necessary to discuss sexual orientation.

Likewise no one discussed the fact that some folks were:

- old grumpy single men who had no social skills
- one couple was a wealthy german codger with a very young and beautiful barbie partnere
- two guys were retired military with severe PTSD problems
- many couples were un-married cohabitating fornicators
- several couples were born again christians

As others have said - No One cares where you came from, why you are there, or what your particular predilections might be. Most cruisers don't know and don't care about your last name - I am Jerry from Mirador and I can't remember ever providing much more detail than that.

The cruising community cares about the here and now, who has good beer, who has good water, and most important who has good movies.

The rest of shoreside life is pretty much ignored.

Welcome aboard!

How very well put!!

Welcome aboard.
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Old 27-03-2015, 23:42   #13
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

Quote:
Originally Posted by TacomaSailor View Post
Over the last 20-years I've been a guest on hundreds of cruising boats and have had hundreds of others visit our boat. I've spent countless hours drinking beer and coffee with those folks and I can not remember the topic of sexual orientation ever coming up.

I know quite a few of the couples were same sex partners yet never once did anyone find it necessary to discuss sexual orientation.

Likewise no one discussed the fact that some folks were:

- old grumpy single men who had no social skills
- one couple was a wealthy german codger with a very young and beautiful barbie partnere
- two guys were retired military with severe PTSD problems
- many couples were un-married cohabitating fornicators
- several couples were born again christians

As others have said - No One cares where you came from, why you are there, or what your particular predilections might be. Most cruisers don't know and don't care about your last name - I am Jerry from Mirador and I can't remember ever providing much more detail than that.

The cruising community cares about the here and now, who has good beer, who has good water, and most important who has good movies.

The rest of shoreside life is pretty much ignored.

Welcome aboard!
That really says it all. It's a non issue - unless you choose to make it an issue and that speaks about you, not the rest of the cruising population.
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Old 28-03-2015, 00:09   #14
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

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Originally Posted by chris95040 View Post
wow that was fast.

Didn't notice the OP asking for 'recognition', 'approval', or to be 'treated any different than anyone else.'

And I've seen many threads here that are of the format 'I'm (some group they identify with), anyone else (that group)? Let's talk about stuff from (that group's) perspective.' Much like this one.

But when (some group) is 'diabetic', or 'new to boating', or 'Canadian', I suspect you don't jump on the thread and make a vitriolic post like this.
You obviously don't know him at all, do you?

His original board name was "vitriolic".
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Old 28-03-2015, 00:10   #15
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship

I might imagine that some ports of call in some countries could be intolerant. Many same sex couples know to be guarded and careful about public displays of affection in suspect surroundings.

I don't think the concern is as much about fellow cruisers, but rather the locals who have less experience and education on thse matters.

Like others have said, it's about how friendly, helpful and welcoming you are to your fellow sailers that matters here.
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