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27-03-2015, 18:32
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#1
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2013
Posts: 26
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Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Hi, I've been reading the threads on this forum and I find it fascinating how people come together and share their stories. However I have noticed that not much is said about gay life while cruising. So, I want to start this topic for those who would like to share and those that would like to learn what it's like being gay and living in the vast open blue ocean.
Please note that this topic is not about ones sex escapades, but the experiences of gay cruisers, being sailers or power boater, while adventuring the coast, the islands or the world.
What have you experience while cruising?
Please share the good, the bad and the ugly.
Also, this topic is not restricted to only gay people, our straight brethren are also welcomed.
Lastly, please refrain from posting crew wanted adds, this is not the place for this.
Respectfully yours
Varlan
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27-03-2015, 19:05
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#2
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Senior Cruiser
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: gettin naughty on the beach in cornwall
Boat: 63 custom alloy sloop,macwester26,prout snowgoose 37 elite catamaran!
Posts: 10,594
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
gay , straight or indifferent,cruisers are probably the most open minded and tolerant family on the planet,welcome to the forum.
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27-03-2015, 20:21
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#4
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2008
Location: puɐןsuǝǝnb 'ʎɐʞɔɐɯ
Boat: Nantucket Island 33
Posts: 4,864
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
I think you'll find cruisers are little different from any other segment of society. When we had our boat in a boatyard for a while doing some work a few years back, there was a transexual lady who suffered some discrimination but also made a lot of friends. The wife and I befriended her and helped her out with her boat on occasion and we still bump into her now and again. To me, it seemed the younger people in the yard weren't really that concerned whilst some of the older were definitely discriminatory.
My step daughter is also openly gay (and she's definitely urban metrosexual and never likely to become a cruiser) and her experiences, I would say, would be pretty much the same. Is that your take?
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27-03-2015, 20:37
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#5
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Senior Cruiser
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: 29° 49.16’ N 82° 25.82’ W
Boat: Pearson 422
Posts: 16,306
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Hi Varlan and welcome to the forum.
Like reefmagnet, I find cruisers are pretty much a cross section of society. Since it tends to be an expensive lifestyle cruisers on average represent a higher level on the socio-economic ladder so perhaps a little more open minded than society in general but you will certainly encounter all kinds.
__________________
The water is always bluer on the other side of the ocean.
Sometimes it's necessary to state the obvious for the benefit of the oblivious.
Rust is the poor man's Loctite.
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27-03-2015, 20:52
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#6
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Chicago
Boat: Alden auxiliary ketch 48'
Posts: 950
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
I notice you've been lurking for awhile. I did, too, before joining and opining. I have learned much here. Chime in with your questions and comments. It's a group that can be rough and raw at times but, in general, I find the folks here sincere in their desire to help others.
Do you have a vessel? Where do you cruise?
Fair winds
__________________
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read.
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27-03-2015, 21:03
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#7
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2007
Boat: Beneteau FIRST 42
Posts: 1,836
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Straight up from an old salt.. Why is it that When someone is "Gay" it seems they need some type of recognition in approval of who they are.. I dont give a damn what your sexual orientation is, or who or what you play with on your own time in your own place.
I've never met a straight person who would ask a question as the OP did..
And Its Bull to expect to be treated any different than any one else..
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27-03-2015, 21:35
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#8
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2014
Location: USA
Boat: 41' yawl
Posts: 1,187
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Quote:
Originally Posted by Randyonr3
Straight up from an old salt.. Why is it that When someone is "Gay" it seems they need some type of recognition in approval of who they are.. I dont give a damn what your sexual orientation is, or who or what you play with on your own time in your own place.
I've never met a straight person who would ask a question as the OP did..
And Its Bull to expect to be treated any different than any one else..
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wow that was fast.
Didn't notice the OP asking for 'recognition', 'approval', or to be 'treated any different than anyone else.'
And I've seen many threads here that are of the format 'I'm (some group they identify with), anyone else (that group)? Let's talk about stuff from (that group's) perspective.' Much like this one.
But when (some group) is 'diabetic', or 'new to boating', or 'Canadian', I suspect you don't jump on the thread and make a vitriolic post like this.
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27-03-2015, 21:39
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#9
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2008
Location: puɐןsuǝǝnb 'ʎɐʞɔɐɯ
Boat: Nantucket Island 33
Posts: 4,864
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Well, you know. Like it or lump it gay people are subject to discrimination in society no matter how politically correct everyone pretends to be. Aside from sexuality they are no different from us "straights" ranging all the way from horribly obnoxious and best avoided to fun to be around.
It just strikes me that the OP is simply interested in hearing about attitudes in general to gay people on the cruising scene. I don't think they're self promoting or recruiting batters for their team in any way.
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27-03-2015, 22:12
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#10
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Registered User
Join Date: Mar 2012
Location: back at langkawi
Boat: valiant 40
Posts: 206
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Hi Varlan and welcome
There are many gay cruisers out there, and there are probably problems that gay cruisers encounter that other groups dont, Though no one I have met yet have mentioned any
Chees
__________________
I've learned so much from my mistakes I'm thinking of making a few more.
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27-03-2015, 22:15
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#11
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2012
Location: Punta Gorda Isles, SW Florida
Boat: Caliber 40
Posts: 1,160
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Over the last 20-years I've been a guest on hundreds of cruising boats and have had hundreds of others visit our boat. I've spent countless hours drinking beer and coffee with those folks and I can not remember the topic of sexual orientation ever coming up.
I know quite a few of the couples were same sex partners yet never once did anyone find it necessary to discuss sexual orientation.
Likewise no one discussed the fact that some folks were:
- old grumpy single men who had no social skills
- one couple was a wealthy german codger with a very young and beautiful barbie partnere
- two guys were retired military with severe PTSD problems
- many couples were un-married cohabitating fornicators
- several couples were born again christians
As others have said - No One cares where you came from, why you are there, or what your particular predilections might be. Most cruisers don't know and don't care about your last name - I am Jerry from Mirador and I can't remember ever providing much more detail than that.
The cruising community cares about the here and now, who has good beer, who has good water, and most important who has good movies.
The rest of shoreside life is pretty much ignored.
Welcome aboard!
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27-03-2015, 22:23
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#12
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Registered User
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Sydney Australia
Boat: Fisher pilothouse sloop 32'
Posts: 3,413
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Quote:
Originally Posted by TacomaSailor
Over the last 20-years I've been a guest on hundreds of cruising boats and have had hundreds of others visit our boat. I've spent countless hours drinking beer and coffee with those folks and I can not remember the topic of sexual orientation ever coming up.
I know quite a few of the couples were same sex partners yet never once did anyone find it necessary to discuss sexual orientation.
Likewise no one discussed the fact that some folks were:
- old grumpy single men who had no social skills
- one couple was a wealthy german codger with a very young and beautiful barbie partnere
- two guys were retired military with severe PTSD problems
- many couples were un-married cohabitating fornicators
- several couples were born again christians
As others have said - No One cares where you came from, why you are there, or what your particular predilections might be. Most cruisers don't know and don't care about your last name - I am Jerry from Mirador and I can't remember ever providing much more detail than that.
The cruising community cares about the here and now, who has good beer, who has good water, and most important who has good movies.
The rest of shoreside life is pretty much ignored.
Welcome aboard!
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How very well put!!
Welcome aboard.
__________________
Rob aka Uncle Bob Sydney Australia.
Life is 10% the cards you are dealt, 90% how you play em
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27-03-2015, 22:42
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#13
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Senior Cruiser
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Port Moresby,Papua New Guinea
Boat: FP Belize Maestro 43 and OPBs
Posts: 12,888
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Quote:
Originally Posted by TacomaSailor
Over the last 20-years I've been a guest on hundreds of cruising boats and have had hundreds of others visit our boat. I've spent countless hours drinking beer and coffee with those folks and I can not remember the topic of sexual orientation ever coming up.
I know quite a few of the couples were same sex partners yet never once did anyone find it necessary to discuss sexual orientation.
Likewise no one discussed the fact that some folks were:
- old grumpy single men who had no social skills
- one couple was a wealthy german codger with a very young and beautiful barbie partnere
- two guys were retired military with severe PTSD problems
- many couples were un-married cohabitating fornicators
- several couples were born again christians
As others have said - No One cares where you came from, why you are there, or what your particular predilections might be. Most cruisers don't know and don't care about your last name - I am Jerry from Mirador and I can't remember ever providing much more detail than that.
The cruising community cares about the here and now, who has good beer, who has good water, and most important who has good movies.
The rest of shoreside life is pretty much ignored.
Welcome aboard!
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That really says it all. It's a non issue - unless you choose to make it an issue and that speaks about you, not the rest of the cruising population.
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27-03-2015, 23:09
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#14
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2013
Location: San Diego, CA
Posts: 6,619
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
Quote:
Originally Posted by chris95040
wow that was fast.
Didn't notice the OP asking for 'recognition', 'approval', or to be 'treated any different than anyone else.'
And I've seen many threads here that are of the format 'I'm (some group they identify with), anyone else (that group)? Let's talk about stuff from (that group's) perspective.' Much like this one.
But when (some group) is 'diabetic', or 'new to boating', or 'Canadian', I suspect you don't jump on the thread and make a vitriolic post like this.
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You obviously don't know him at all, do you?
His original board name was "vitriolic".
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27-03-2015, 23:10
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#15
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Florida
Posts: 130
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Re: Gay life: cruising and aboard a ship
I might imagine that some ports of call in some countries could be intolerant. Many same sex couples know to be guarded and careful about public displays of affection in suspect surroundings.
I don't think the concern is as much about fellow cruisers, but rather the locals who have less experience and education on thse matters.
Like others have said, it's about how friendly, helpful and welcoming you are to your fellow sailers that matters here.
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