Cruisers Forum
 


Join CruisersForum Today

Reply
 
Thread Tools Rate Thread Display Modes
Old 23-06-2016, 22:23   #91
Registered User

Join Date: Jun 2016
Posts: 138
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by redhead View Post

My big mistake was making an ultimatum. I had been waiting for a dozen years and the time was approaching when I could touch my 401K and I said (flippantly, I thought) "well I'm going with you or without you when I'm 59 and a half." Boy oh boy, that was a mistake. It hurt his feelings, made him powerless in the decision. If I could eat those words I would.
WOOPS!! Well, I already screwed up then. I basically told my wife the same thing.
Now what?
Problem is, Im serious.
Wife dream. Remodel the house into her dream home. Have me continue to work 12 hours a day till I die to pay for it.
My dream, Sail the world. Not work 12 hour days till I die.
__________________

__________________
landlockedsquid is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 04:41   #92
Registered User
 
daletournier's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Seychelles
Boat: Catalina 470
Posts: 1,899
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by landlockedsquid View Post
WOOPS!! Well, I already screwed up then. I basically told my wife the same thing.
Now what?
Problem is, Im serious.
Wife dream. Remodel the house into her dream home. Have me continue to work 12 hours a day till I die to pay for it.
My dream, Sail the world. Not work 12 hour days till I die.
It takes courage to live your life.

Sent from my vivo Y35 using Cruisers Sailing Forum mobile app
__________________

__________________
daletournier is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 05:21   #93
Senior Cruiser
 
Kenomac's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Somewhere in the Adriatic Sea
Boat: Oyster 53 Cutter
Posts: 8,515
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by vjm View Post
That's interesting. I know several, including myself. Funny how stereotypes and drawing global conclusions from experience that is neccesarily limited isnt really useful when applied to real life.

OP knows his/her wife. We don't. She could be a hardcore cold weather camper or luxury loving. Those kinds of things will be important in pursuing any part of this dream. Convince? No. Expose your partner to something new and see if they like it? Sure. What form that takes will depend on way too many factors for anyone else to consider. Chartering is a great idea just to see if both of you actually enjoy it.

And that "Changing Course" book is one of the few sailing books I really did not like. Takes all kinds I suppose, just like everything else.
Regarding the minimalist lifestyle...

Sure, there will always be exceptions found, 'no problem with it. But I can also point to many hundreds of failed dream boats where the partner/wife wasn't onboard with the minimalist lifestyle idea.

In fact, I met another fellow in that very situation just two weeks ago. His wife is just fine with cruising for one or two weeks at a time while tuffin' it through without a daily hot shower, copious amounts of water, electricity, lighting, morning toast, blow dryer etc., but full time liveaboard under these conditions.... she's keeping the land based apartment.

The marinas are filled with boats and men with failed dreams. They just don't get it, and probably never will.

I agree that chartering would be a great idea.
Attached Thumbnails
Click image for larger version

Name:	image.jpeg
Views:	52
Size:	130.9 KB
ID:	126775  
__________________
Kenomac is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 05:56   #94
CF Adviser
 
Pelagic's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Oct 2007
Boat: Van Helleman Schooner 65ft StarGazer
Posts: 6,895
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by landlockedsquid View Post
WOOPS!! Well, I already screwed up then. I basically told my wife the same thing.
Now what?
Problem is, Im serious.
Wife dream. Remodel the house into her dream home. Have me continue to work 12 hours a day till I die to pay for it.
My dream, Sail the world. Not work 12 hour days till I die.
https://youtu.be/JmHJcrOi59Q
__________________
Pelagic is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 06:23   #95
Registered User
 
daletournier's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Seychelles
Boat: Catalina 470
Posts: 1,899
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Time,health and money.....you don't always have all three, that Utube sort of smacks you right between the eyes.

Sent from my vivo Y35 using Cruisers Sailing Forum mobile app
__________________
daletournier is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 06:27   #96
Registered User
 
daletournier's Avatar

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Seychelles
Boat: Catalina 470
Posts: 1,899
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kenomac View Post
Regarding the minimalist lifestyle...

Sure, there will always be exceptions found, 'no problem with it. But I can also point to many hundreds of failed dream boats where the partner/wife wasn't onboard with the minimalist lifestyle idea.

In fact, I met another fellow in that very situation just two weeks ago. His wife is just fine with cruising for one or two weeks at a time while tuffin' it through without a daily hot shower, copious amounts of water, electricity, lighting, morning toast, blow dryer etc., but full time liveaboard under these conditions.... she's keeping the land based apartment.

The marinas are filled with boats and men with failed dreams. They just don't get it, and probably never will.

I agree that chartering would be a great idea.
But, I can also point to many that didn't workout that were on very nice boats. Sure, minimalist makes it harder but minimalist is subjective. If you have left a 5 bedroom home then most boats are minimalist.

Sent from my vivo Y35 using Cruisers Sailing Forum mobile app
__________________
daletournier is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 06:45   #97
Senior Cruiser
 
Kenomac's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Somewhere in the Adriatic Sea
Boat: Oyster 53 Cutter
Posts: 8,515
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by daletournier View Post
But, I can also point to many that didn't workout that were on very nice boats. Sure, minimalist makes it harder but minimalist is subjective. If you have left a 5 bedroom home then most boats are minimalist.

Sent from my vivo Y35 using Cruisers Sailing Forum mobile app
Most of the boats anchored next to us here off Capri are five to tens times larger than a five bedroom house. Most if these boats are hardly what most would consider minimalist.
Attached Thumbnails
Click image for larger version

Name:	image.jpg
Views:	47
Size:	348.0 KB
ID:	126776  
__________________
Kenomac is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 06:58   #98
Senior Cruiser
 
Kenomac's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Somewhere in the Adriatic Sea
Boat: Oyster 53 Cutter
Posts: 8,515
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

I guess it all depends on where one lives as to what is minimalist.

Here, we are one of the few non-super or mega yachts. But we do share the same view.
Attached Thumbnails
Click image for larger version

Name:	image.jpg
Views:	55
Size:	232.6 KB
ID:	126778  
__________________
Kenomac is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 07:15   #99
Registered User
 
scgilligan's Avatar

Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Upstate SC, USA
Posts: 148
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by CharlesV View Post
..with a white picket fence and flower garden too. I cant think of any boat than can do that....
Maybe you could fashion some sort of light wood pickets on your lifelines? The garden is a bit harder, but I would bet someone has done it..
__________________
scgilligan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 08:08   #100
Moderator
 
Hudson Force's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Nov 2008
Location: Lived aboard & cruised for 45 years,- now on a chair in my walk-in closet.
Boat: Morgan OI 413 1973 - Aythya
Posts: 7,894
Images: 1
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by scgilligan View Post
................
............................ The garden is a bit harder, but I would bet someone has done it..






It can be the garden on board or the garden you cruise to.



__________________
Take care and joy, Aythya crew
Hudson Force is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 09:18   #101
Senior Cruiser
 
Kenomac's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Somewhere in the Adriatic Sea
Boat: Oyster 53 Cutter
Posts: 8,515
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

I hate to break it to most of you and the OP, but selling the idea of living aboard is all about the amenities. For most, a 31ft sailboat with a pump head and cold shower won't cut it.

I seriously doubt any of my neighbors here today had much difficulty selling their significant others on the idea of cruising or living aboard. Especially the fellow with the 100ft water slide.
Attached Thumbnails
Click image for larger version

Name:	image.jpg
Views:	44
Size:	350.5 KB
ID:	126781  
__________________
Kenomac is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 09:36   #102
Registered User
 
scgilligan's Avatar

Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Upstate SC, USA
Posts: 148
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kenomac View Post
..
I seriously doubt any of my neighbors here today had much difficulty selling their significant others on the idea of cruising or living aboard. Especially the fellow with the 100ft water slide.
Yeah, that would be an easy sell, but not the reality for 99.9% of us here. I understand about the amenities though..the 30 footer would be fine for me, but the wife would require quite a bit more to be "comfortable"..for her, sailing and "living" on a sailboat would be a "lovely getaway"...one that would remain lovely for every bit of 3 days.
__________________
scgilligan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 09:47   #103
Registered User

Join Date: Jun 2015
Posts: 1,172
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Kenomac is absolutely right in what he sez in #101, of course.

But what is comme il faut among the "superyacht" set is hardly relevant to what we do :-)

"Selling" the live-aboard lifestyle to anyone - woman OR man - obviously depends on having a buyer who is, to borrow a phrase, "ready, willing and able".

I think it is a function of the fundamental genetic programming of Homo sapiens that among those who are ready, willing and able, there will be a preponderance of XY over XX.

I'm fairly confident that had the biological effects of my "Y" not been attenuated by the effluxion of time, MyBeloved would not find me a satisfactory shipmate :-)!

TrentePieds
__________________
TrentePieds is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 09:48   #104
Don't ask if you can't handle it
 
sailorboy1's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: On the boat somewhere
Boat: Hunter 410
Posts: 12,319
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

I wonder how many "He Men" use the "I would be happy on a floating camp tent but my wife needs ........." to justify having a civilized boat life?
__________________
jobless, houseless, clueless, living on a boat and cruising around somewhere
sailorboy1 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 24-06-2016, 10:29   #105
Senior Cruiser
 
Kenomac's Avatar

Cruisers Forum Supporter

Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Somewhere in the Adriatic Sea
Boat: Oyster 53 Cutter
Posts: 8,515
Re: Convincing wife to liveaboard?

Quote:
Originally Posted by sailorboy1 View Post
I wonder how many "He Men" use the "I would be happy on a floating camp tent but my wife needs ........." to justify having a civilized boat life?
I think it would take more than just a few potted plants for the OP's wife to overlook a hand pump head, cold shower, cold cereal for breakfast and bilge odor.

'Just a hunch.
__________________

__________________
Kenomac is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
liveaboard

Thread Tools
Display Modes Rate This Thread
Rate This Thread:

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
I am having a low liveaboard day, seems like no one understands why I liveaboard Goosebumps Liveaboard's Forum 33 11-01-2016 15:23
Challenge: Overcoming Major Hurdle to World Cruise: Convincing the Wife ! category4jay Challenges 132 09-12-2014 14:28
Liveaboard questions. Wife is onboard :) Thebriansnyder Liveaboard's Forum 45 09-08-2013 08:35
Wife has agreed to liveaboard with 2 young boys. Thebriansnyder Families, Kids and Pets Afloat 12 04-06-2013 01:32



Copyright 2002- Social Knowledge, LLC All Rights Reserved.

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 17:18.


Google+
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Social Knowledge Networks
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.

ShowCase vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.