Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?

[NoahTreat]

Originally Posted by danielamartindm

I think if I wanted a friend, I'd choose a guy.

Or a dog

[Taichungman]

NO WAY, she is an EX for a reason. You get trapped on a small boat a 1000 miles from nowhere and things might get ugly. Who's going to be the Captain? How did that go over before?

[FlyingScot]

I would guess you would couple up or split ways. Not likely to stay friends with no benefits other than cost sharing a boat.

[nwdiver]

Have you seen the two staterooms on a Bayfield 40?????? The companionway ladder will between you and your ex's stateroom, not so good for your next girlfriend and the moaning and shrieks from over there will drive your nuts.

As to the vblog bit nobody will believe you are exs.........

[shyguy68]

Originally Posted by danielamartindm

I think if I wanted a friend, I'd choose a guy; they're saner.

Not unless they are the Donald.....that's one guy who defines insanity.

[Three Sisters]

Originally Posted by shyguy68

Ok, here's the thing. I have been working for a few years to find the right boat for me and my ex-gf/ex-fiancee (currently just friends, not even the best of) to live on and cruise the US coast and down to the caribbean/bahamas. I think I found the boat, and she agrees that it checks alot of the right boxes. She has been told by a relative whose friend has a sailboat that yearly costs to maintain a sailboat could equal or exceed 50k which is about what the boat costs (40' 1983 Bayfield). I have told her that yearly averages are equal to or less than half that to even live in a bit of luxury.

My question to you guys/gals is, Can two people who used to be together live on a 40' sailboat as just friends? and work together on cruising videos for youtube/patreon?

Have to concur with what ever Dear Abby spits out.

Dear Abby | uexpress

[shyguy68]

Originally Posted by nwdiver

Have you seen the two staterooms on a Bayfield 40?????? The companionway ladder will between you and your ex's stateroom, not so good for your next girlfriend and the moaning and shrieks from over there will drive your nuts.

As to the vblog bit nobody will believe you are exs.........

and what's under the stairs, the engine room....so starting the engine can quickly cover most noise like moaning....she's quiet in that department.

[shyguy68]

Originally Posted by FlyingScot

I would guess you would couple up or split ways. Not likely to stay friends with no benefits other than cost sharing a boat.

no cost sharing, it's all hers....I'm just there as a companion/captain/dinner buddy/chief cook and bottlewasher etc

[shyguy68]

Originally Posted by NoahTreat

Or a dog

I concur....small dog....the big ones take up alot of space.....

[benjiwoodboat]

that is not a question for the forum... that is a discussion between you and your ex.

[gamayun]

Originally Posted by hobopacket

Awww no...

and other similar sentiments --- so are you guys saying that if she says "no" then he will resort to raping her?! Seriously, if two people can't be adults and remain platonic because that's what has been decided, then we're seriously f**ked as a civilized culture. So the question is whether you two can remain friends and without jealousy if she brings a lover on board.

[shyguy68]

Originally Posted by gamayun

and other similar sentiments --- so are you guys saying that if she says "no" then he will resort to raping her?! Seriously, if two people can't be adults and remain platonic because that's what has been decided, then we're seriously f**ked as a civilized culture. So the question is whether you two can remain friends and without jealousy if she brings a lover on board.

Well, since I'm not a narcissist or mysogenist, civility will rule the day......

[Paul L]

Originally Posted by gamayun

and other similar sentiments --- so are you guys saying that if she says "no" then he will resort to raping her?! Seriously, if two people can't be adults and remain platonic because that's what has been decided, then we're seriously f**ked as a civilized culture. So the question is whether you two can remain friends and without jealousy if she brings a lover on board.

Nothing like that at all. The question was do others think this could be successful on a small cruising boats. Most think not. It has nothing to do with rape or the like. Two people, in a small space, 24/7 under stressful conditions for multiple years. It isn't easy for the best of couples. The successful ones are usually brought even closer together by the experience. The marginal relationships often get much worse.

[TooCoys]

The ONLY reason I'd cruise with my ex.... was to drown him in between remote islands.

[LoudMusic]

My brother-in-law lives with his ex-wife (different bedrooms) so that their children aren't moving between two houses every week. I think it's a good arrangement and keeps the children in the best situation possible.

They get along. They even watch TV together with his new girlfriend.

That said, there's no way I'd trap myself on a boat with an ex As soon as one of the two of you start dating someone new that the other doesn't enjoy, for whatever reason, it's going to be really frustrating for both of you.