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31-07-2017, 17:24
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#16
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2016
Location: Sherwood Arkansas
Boat: Tanzer 22
Posts: 185
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Quote:
Originally Posted by danielamartindm
I think if I wanted a friend, I'd choose a guy.
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Or a dog
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31-07-2017, 17:44
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#17
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Registered User
Join Date: Oct 2013
Location: Texas and Taiwan
Posts: 217
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
NO WAY, she is an EX for a reason. You get trapped on a small boat a 1000 miles from nowhere and things might get ugly. Who's going to be the Captain? How did that go over before?
__________________
The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.
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31-07-2017, 18:04
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#18
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Registered User
Join Date: Nov 2015
Boat: R&C Leopard 40
Posts: 884
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
I would guess you would couple up or split ways. Not likely to stay friends with no benefits other than cost sharing a boat.
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31-07-2017, 18:12
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#19
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Vancouver, BC
Boat: C&C Landfall 38
Posts: 821
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Have you seen the two staterooms on a Bayfield 40?????? The companionway ladder will between you and your ex's stateroom, not so good for your next girlfriend and the moaning and shrieks from over there will drive your nuts.
As to the vblog bit nobody will believe you are exs.........
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31-07-2017, 18:16
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#20
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: St. John's, NL Canada
Posts: 33
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Quote:
Originally Posted by danielamartindm
I think if I wanted a friend, I'd choose a guy; they're saner.
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Not unless they are the Donald.....that's one guy who defines insanity.
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31-07-2017, 18:18
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#21
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Registered User
Join Date: Feb 2016
Location: USA
Posts: 489
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Quote:
Originally Posted by shyguy68
Ok, here's the thing. I have been working for a few years to find the right boat for me and my ex-gf/ex-fiancee (currently just friends, not even the best of) to live on and cruise the US coast and down to the caribbean/bahamas. I think I found the boat, and she agrees that it checks alot of the right boxes. She has been told by a relative whose friend has a sailboat that yearly costs to maintain a sailboat could equal or exceed 50k which is about what the boat costs (40' 1983 Bayfield). I have told her that yearly averages are equal to or less than half that to even live in a bit of luxury.
My question to you guys/gals is, Can two people who used to be together live on a 40' sailboat as just friends? and work together on cruising videos for youtube/patreon?
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Have to concur with what ever Dear Abby spits out.
Dear Abby | uexpress
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31-07-2017, 18:19
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#22
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: St. John's, NL Canada
Posts: 33
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Quote:
Originally Posted by nwdiver
Have you seen the two staterooms on a Bayfield 40?????? The companionway ladder will between you and your ex's stateroom, not so good for your next girlfriend and the moaning and shrieks from over there will drive your nuts.
As to the vblog bit nobody will believe you are exs.........
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and what's under the stairs, the engine room....so starting the engine can quickly cover most noise like moaning....she's quiet in that department.
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31-07-2017, 18:22
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#23
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: St. John's, NL Canada
Posts: 33
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Quote:
Originally Posted by FlyingScot
I would guess you would couple up or split ways. Not likely to stay friends with no benefits other than cost sharing a boat.
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no cost sharing, it's all hers....I'm just there as a companion/captain/dinner buddy/chief cook and bottlewasher etc
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31-07-2017, 18:23
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#24
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: St. John's, NL Canada
Posts: 33
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Quote:
Originally Posted by NoahTreat
Or a dog
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I concur....small dog....the big ones take up alot of space.....
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31-07-2017, 18:27
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#25
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Marine Service Provider
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Nomad (often in Maine)
Boat: Norseman 447
Posts: 223
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
that is not a question for the forum... that is a discussion between you and your ex.
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31-07-2017, 18:34
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#26
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Registered User
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Oakland, CA
Boat: Freedom 38
Posts: 2,503
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Quote:
Originally Posted by hobopacket
Awww no...
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and other similar sentiments --- so are you guys saying that if she says "no" then he will resort to raping her?! Seriously, if two people can't be adults and remain platonic because that's what has been decided, then we're seriously f**ked as a civilized culture. So the question is whether you two can remain friends and without jealousy if she brings a lover on board.
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31-07-2017, 18:43
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#27
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Registered User
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: St. John's, NL Canada
Posts: 33
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Quote:
Originally Posted by gamayun
and other similar sentiments --- so are you guys saying that if she says "no" then he will resort to raping her?! Seriously, if two people can't be adults and remain platonic because that's what has been decided, then we're seriously f**ked as a civilized culture. So the question is whether you two can remain friends and without jealousy if she brings a lover on board.
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Well, since I'm not a narcissist or mysogenist, civility will rule the day......
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31-07-2017, 18:56
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#28
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Registered User
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Bellingham
Boat: Outbound 44
Posts: 9,319
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
Quote:
Originally Posted by gamayun
and other similar sentiments --- so are you guys saying that if she says "no" then he will resort to raping her?! Seriously, if two people can't be adults and remain platonic because that's what has been decided, then we're seriously f**ked as a civilized culture. So the question is whether you two can remain friends and without jealousy if she brings a lover on board.
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Nothing like that at all. The question was do others think this could be successful on a small cruising boats. Most think not. It has nothing to do with rape or the like. Two people, in a small space, 24/7 under stressful conditions for multiple years. It isn't easy for the best of couples. The successful ones are usually brought even closer together by the experience. The marginal relationships often get much worse.
__________________
Paul
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31-07-2017, 19:49
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#29
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Registered User
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: earth
Posts: 589
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
The ONLY reason I'd cruise with my ex.... was to drown him in between remote islands.
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31-07-2017, 20:00
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#30
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Registered User
Join Date: Jan 2017
Location: Everywhere
Boat: Colegate 26
Posts: 1,154
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Re: Can 2 people live aboard and just be friends?
My brother-in-law lives with his ex-wife (different bedrooms) so that their children aren't moving between two houses every week. I think it's a good arrangement and keeps the children in the best situation possible.
They get along. They even watch TV together with his new girlfriend.
That said, there's no way I'd trap myself on a boat with an ex As soon as one of the two of you start dating someone new that the other doesn't enjoy, for whatever reason, it's going to be really frustrating for both of you.
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