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Old 03-11-2012, 13:54   #31
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

Virginia Boy,
I just wanted to say good luck in whatever you end up doing. Maybe a break will do you good. I haven't put my boat in the water since buying it in April as I'm still doing some work on my own so I'm still enjoying myself.

Take Care & all the best to you.
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Old 03-11-2012, 13:58   #32
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

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Originally Posted by Rakuflames View Post
For me it's been more like 3/4 can't be trusted. The absolute nadir was the yard that replaced my propeller strut, putting it on crooked. But when the foreman discovered it the next day it was OK ... because they had used the wrong bedding compound -- it was easily moved!

I could go on and on and on.
Truth here. The marine industry is filled with hacks and cheats. We've discovered that educating ourselves and then doing the work ourselves often results in a much higher quality job than we could get even if we paid absolute top dollar.
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Old 03-11-2012, 14:17   #33
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

Hi everybody,

First of all, excuse me for my english langage quality. I am French and I do my best to speak the best english I can.

I have just been told about this forum from the french forum "hisse et oh" and have read some the posts. I feel very concerned with this one because I am (maybe now I could say that I was) in the same situation as you.
My boat is a Ne Quid Nimis (34 feet long) and is 31 years old (I am 35 years old). I have bought her 4 years ago and I have spent as much money as time to bring her in good condition.
Many times I have had the same feeling as you and I was looking the other yacht around me with sadness not to be able to sail.

I have done the most emergency work for her to float and I have sailed as soon as I was able to do.
The fact to spend one day on the sea, on your own boat is the biggest reward and will give you a second blow to attack the second part of the work.

My first trip with my boat was to cross the channel from france to ireland.
Here is a link of a short video during my return to france :

I had a problem : I wanted to do too much things at the same time. My experience now is that it is better to do job after job and to sail (even if it is a very few time) between each one.

I am preparing this boat to cruise all over the world in 6 years (when I will have finished to work in the navy).

Take your time and sail on your boat (or if it isn't possible on a sister ship).

In france we say that sailing is 80% of work and 20% of pleasure.

By the way, I see that the shipchandler are the same to the other side of the atlantic. I have learned to maintain my boat without them. It's cheaper and you understand that many things are quite the same in the agricultural shop.

Don't let your dream because of a loss of motivation. Breath, sail and try to take pleasure to work on your boat.
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Old 03-11-2012, 14:27   #34
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

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Originally Posted by virginia boy View Post
I don't know when I might come back.

Today I've reached my limit. I regret ever having bought this money pit, and I'm disgusted with the shady, unscrupulous, estimate doubling SOB, larcenous contractors in the marine industry.

I'm frustrated and overwhelmed with the sheer volume of work yet to be done and exhausted with the study regimen required to learn all this stuff.

I was so angry with the riggers work today I wanted to go punch him in the mouth so rather than go to jail I'm walking away. I'm leaving the boat on the hard and I'm going to the condo and I might be back in the spring or maybe not.

Please forgive my rant but maybe prospective boat owners and wannabes can learn from this thread what a nightmare it can be. An old boat can wipe you out financially, emotionally, spiritually and physically.

I'm going to walk away. I will start paying more attention to my children, my fiancé, my emotional and physical health and all the really important things I've been neglecting.

My boat was a source of dreams and a promise of adventure and it still is but at the present time it's a liability. I can't survive on dreams alone.

If I had it to do over knowing what I know now, I would buy a boat in much better condition that required less work and was more immediately enjoyable.

Anyone else ever walked away?

I have a friend that bought a fixer-upper. I told him not to buy it. The surveyor said, in that "language" they use, that for it's age it was fine (bla,bla,bla). Right. Just about all the systems needed work. I won't name them as it is just too long a list. He was blinded by love for the boat and a vision (dream?). Even when he lifted the skirt and looked hard he could not see the Pox. And he is not too handy in the DIY dept. Had it less than two years.

Five years later he has done it again. This boat has a little diesel that just stops sometimes. Strong diesel smell. The cabin leaks in multiple places. 2x4 "backing plates" sealed with silicone for some add on items. Sails that are obviously shot. Frayed running rigging all over. Standing rigging with rust and some "fish hooks". Wiring worn through. Wire ends that are solid green dust. Loose pintles. rotten tiller arm. DIY cabin sole of ply and paint -buckling and peeling. Soft fore-deck. There is more.

Just a god-awful mess.

He just could not see the Pox. All he saw was the classic double-ender and the lines. Oh such a beautiful sight!

He is going to sell it soon. Lack of time and all..............

My boat is sold too because I deluded myself into thinking I could make enough time to use it. I just work too much to have time to do upkeep and use it. I was mostly just doing upkeep. Some seem satisfied with that piddling in the marina and socializing there. I don't want that. I want to use it. It was almost new too but there is always something to do even if it is just cleaning it of dirt and bird poo.

If you are overwhelmed, go ahead and cut your losses now, save up and you can decide later what you want to do with your spare time. (and all your money!)

Like my avatar says, Back to just the Jon boat.
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Old 03-11-2012, 14:30   #35
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

Sounds like a good time to go away and drink about it. Autumn is the time to hunker down with the resources you have. Spring is when we get the annual urge to spring clean, plant the garden and spruce things up. Maybe the boat will get a second chance in the spring.
BTW, hope you've got it well ventilated.
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Old 03-11-2012, 14:50   #36
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

I am new to cruising, having raced small boats for years. I am looking for a liveaboard and can buy on US West or East coast. Can someone help me with advice or websites re: Makes, length, equipt. ? Is Florida the best place to buy for price and cruising equipt?
Thanks go out for any help!
~WP
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Old 03-11-2012, 14:51   #37
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

Get rid of the boat, and get into something you enjoy.
Your situation, IMHO, is like a couple considering divorce, who decide they need a trial separation.
Once you walk away from the problem, and learn to live with the alternatives, going back is never the same.
Life is too short, despite what Oprah says.
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Old 03-11-2012, 15:05   #38
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

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Originally Posted by Therapy View Post
Some seem satisfied with that piddling in the marina and socializing there. I don't want that. I want to use it.
I understand what you are saying but in this case it might be just the solution for this gentleman. Our marina is particularly friendly and there is a lot of knowledge floating around. Just the other day a friend brought in a new to him Morgan 38, it's basically sound but needs lots of little things done. When he got frustrated that the AC wouldn't run, a couple of us went on board and solved the problem in a few minutes. He has a couple of minor gelcoat issues that I offered to fix for him, I doubt I'll need to spend more than 30 min..

On the other hand I've been ill for a bit more than a year and thankfully on the mend. During all that time my friends have looked after my boat to keep her safe. I need to replace the heat exchanger on the engine, not a difficult job on an engine stand in the garage but a royal pain in the boat. I've got more volunteers than can fit in the cabin to give me a hand.

After a year of neglect I can understand the frustration in a seemingly endless list of things to do. As other posters have stated, don't look at the whole list. If I have a day or two, I look around and see what can be done in that time frame. Next time, I do the same. Don't be too ambitious, everything seems to take longer on a boat. I remember replacing the head on my first boat. I figured an hour tops, it took 5 days because nothing fit and had to be custom fabricated.

So as others have stated, take a deep breath, cultivate friends who know something about sailboats. At the very least they can let you know who are ripoff artists and who does good work. Unfortunately (or fortunately) I no longer smoke but when I did a glass of "ol' thought provoker" and my pipe while sitting in the cockpit pondering what to do next did wonders.

Best of luck, no matter what your final decision.

Rich

ps I stopped making lists, they were too depressing.
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Old 03-11-2012, 15:18   #39
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

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Originally Posted by loustig View Post
Hi everybody,

First of all, excuse me for my english langage quality. I am French and I do my best to speak the best english I can.
Welcome to CF - and IMO some very good advice .


In OP's shoes I would take a few months off from this boat and then decide whether to sell or keep (and if so, by taking loustig's approach).

Sometimes in life it does make sense to stop banging head against a wall .


And a quick plug! - this is what the Refurb / Refit thread in my sig is about.........

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Old 03-11-2012, 15:19   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rakuflames

For me it's been more like 3/4 can't be trusted. The absolute nadir was the yard that replaced my propeller strut, putting it on crooked. But when the foreman discovered it the next day it was OK ... because they had used the wrong bedding compound -- it was easily moved!

I could go on and on and on.
Agree totally. So many untrustworthy idiots in every repair community that if I couldn't fix most things myself id go broke and crazy.

I say make a reef out it than you can enjoy it underwater
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Old 03-11-2012, 15:23   #41
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

So the next time someone comes along, who has fallen in love with a boat that is obviously just going to be a time and money pit, will we still get all the criticism for being "naysayers" if we tell them the truth about it? Probably.

I'm really sorry to hear that you've gotten to this point, VirginiaBoy. I hope things work out for you. Maybe a bit of time away will renew your drive. Or maybe you will realize that you really do need to walk away from this one, regroup, and move on to something else a few years down the road. Only you can make that decision. Whatever the case, good luck.
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Old 03-11-2012, 15:30   #42
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

i had to get to la cruz in order to find someone who knew beans about repairing any kind of boat--i got extremely fortunate to have known an ex of his when she was bragging on ditching him for another guy and keeping boat and the theft thereof..etc..is a small world. now i have hired this guy to fix what is repairable at 1/6 the usa rate. loving it.

my cousin just lived thru a hurrycame in nj. her boat didnt live thru it--she is wondering what she did wrong to make her boat break and sink, despite having done everything correctly and as her poppa showed us all .... but she is having doubts about her abilities as a sailorette in keeping her boat safe---and talking about giving it up as a result--

what makes you happy---does sailing make you happy?? if you do no t plan on cruising for a buncha years, why not just get a ready to sail lil cute boat and sail it--they keep the sailing blues away, and donot take a lot of dollars to run.....if you prefer to do something else--go for it--- have fun in life.
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Old 03-11-2012, 15:32   #43
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

Yeah ... sad to say I felt this way recently when we were hauled out in the boat yard. It seemed to me that the artisans working on my boat knew they had us by the 'short and curly' ... stuck on their island with nowhere to go until you just pay their price!

The lesson I have learnt is that I will never rely on these guys again. I have now ordered all tooling I need and in future will be able to effect all repairs myself.

The one thing to watch out for when being hauled is what you sign in the yard and what you write on the job order sheet. I fortunately had been VERY SPECIFIC and spelt out what the maximum price would be. Even then it was a struggle but I could see they were concerned when I made reference to the job order sheet stipulations we had signed. Take a photo of it with your Iphone if they cannot give you a copy.

Sorry it's this way ... a few cruising mates and I have been discussing how tired we are of being at the mercy of these idiots !!!

Hang in there ... cruising is still the best life!
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Old 03-11-2012, 15:35   #44
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

... oh ... and on another note ... I met a guy on his boat called Stingo. He actually has a site called 'Desperate Cruisers' and is on this forum. He joined us on Impi and is putting together a great site where cruisers can work for each other and swap out skills. Ana and he looked at a site for kids at sea as well ... kind of a way to link cruising kids, education etc.
I think we need to look out for each other a bit more ... that's what makes cruising even more fun!
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Old 03-11-2012, 15:42   #45
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Re: I'm walking away from my boat.

Hey There,
Yes, I have walked away from my boat also. She was a beautiful little wooden yacht with lovely lines but needed so much work that I ran out of steam. I spent nearly a year repairing her and then spent five extremely happy years living aboard with my son until the dry rot demanded another overhaul. Well I just could not face all the hard work again so I'm afraid I did walk away and that was one of the hardest decisions in my life.
But on the flip side I have so many great memories: even the leaky cabin roof seems funny now and also waking up in the night to feel the cabin floor to see if the boat was sinking or not...
So if you can pick up a boat like that real cheap and have a few years of fun then great, go for it. Wooden boats unfortunately do not last for ever, especially if they have been neglected.
Would I do it again? Yes, definitely. But having said that I'm saving up for my next yacht and hope to buy one in good condition and with a fiberglass hull!!!!!!
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