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Old 19-12-2018, 11:13   #1
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Whats the RULES!!

Ok, so I have been amazed by the rules a lot of folks seem to have aboard their boats, and will admit I find a great many of them entertaining.

Yes bad me, I have a sense of humor.

If you have a sense of humor too, have some time to kill, may be entertained by some of the posts, don't mind your posts being found entertaining and are interested in sharing some of "YOUR RULES!!!" I invite you toss in some posts.

You may even have heard of or had imposed on you some "interesting" or "debatable" rules. Perhaps.

After consultation with wifey we found the only rule aboard our boat was/is....the captain has the final say. Oh, no shoes unless it's cold....yup, cold toes suck, even a big tough fellow like myself hates cold toesies!

I picture captains strutting up and down the dock, riding crop under the arm stating " thou shalt not... etc etc " I know it's not the case, but thats just what my mind pictures. Huh?

Anyhow, post away.

PS; thin skinned folks may not wish to participate, and thats fine....seriously, no hard feelings or name calling eh?
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Old 19-12-2018, 11:16   #2
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

On my boat, shoes are required. They give better grip on the wet deck, and protect poor little toes from being broken when stubbed on cleats and winches...

I don't want crew incapacitated by broken toes, even big tough ones.
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Old 19-12-2018, 11:25   #3
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Well... after reading another thread that covered this topic I have a new rule on my boat... no peeing in the cockpit drains!
And you kids, no hot chocolate on the newly varnished table without coasters!
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Old 19-12-2018, 11:37   #4
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Don C L View Post
Well... after reading another thread that covered this topic I have a new rule on my boat... no peeing in the cockpit drains!

And you kids, no hot chocolate on the newly varnished table without coasters!


I’ve never even considered it necessary to bring up not peeing in the cockpit drains.......is that a thing? The smell!!
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Old 19-12-2018, 11:43   #5
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Our main "rule" is that we do the most conservative thing anyone on the boat thinks should done. By that I mean if:
- one person thinks we should reef, we reef
- if one person thinks it time for life vest or harnesses, we put them on
- if one person thinks the conditions are too bad for whatever we are doing, we look for some other direction etc to sail to reduce the dangers
- if one person feels the forecast is too sucky, we don't go
- if one person thinks Don is wrong, we toss them over the side
- if one person thinks it OK to pee in the cockpit drains, we leave them ashore
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Old 19-12-2018, 11:44   #6
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

LOL!!Pee in the cockpit drains?.....I did say no name calling.....but gee, I am tempted!

You would have a less confrontational result by peeing on my leg!
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Old 19-12-2018, 11:48   #7
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Ok, but no mast rules, they're over the top.
Oh, and no keel rules, they’re beneath us.

The three unwritten rules of life:
1.
2.
3.

Quote:
... After consultation with MY wifey, we found the only rule aboard our boat was/is/ARE ...
1. The Female always makes THE RULES.
2. THE RULES are subject to change without notice.
3. No Male can possible know all THE RULES.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all THE RULES, she must immediately change some of THE RULES.
5. The Female is never wrong.
6. If it appears the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by something the Male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule #6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The Female can change her mind at any time.
9. The Male must never change his mind without the express, written consent of The Female.
10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Female must, under no circumstances, let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. The Male is expected to read the mind of the Female at all times.
14. At all times, what is important is what the Female meant, not what she said.
15. If the Male doesn't abide by THE RULES, it is because he can't take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.
16. If the Female has PMS, all THE RULES are null and void and the Male must cater to her every whim.
17. Any attempt to document THE RULES could result in bodily harm.
18. If the Male, at any time, believes he is right, he must refer to Rule #5.
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Old 19-12-2018, 11:51   #8
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by GordMay View Post
Ok, but no mast rules, they're over the top.
Oh, and no keel rules, they’re beneath us.

The three unwritten rules of life:
1.
2.
3.

1. The Female always makes THE RULES.
2. THE RULES are subject to change without notice.
3. No Male can possible know all THE RULES.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all THE RULES, she must immediately change some of THE RULES.
5. The Female is never wrong.
6. If it appears the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by something the Male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule #6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The Female can change her mind at any time.
9. The Male must never change his mind without the express, written consent of The Female.
10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Female must, under no circumstances, let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. The Male is expected to read the mind of the Female at all times.
14. At all times, what is important is what the Female meant, not what she said.
15. If the Male doesn't abide by THE RULES, it is because he can't take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.
16. If the Female has PMS, all THE RULES are null and void and the Male must cater to her every whim.
17. Any attempt to document THE RULES could result in bodily harm.
18. If the Male, at any time, believes he is right, he must refer to Rule #5.
Oh God... I think I'll frame that for my wife for Christmas... she'll love it!
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Old 19-12-2018, 12:02   #9
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Allied39 View Post
Ok, so I have been amazed by the rules a lot of folks seem to have aboard their boats, and will admit I find a great many of them entertaining.

Yes bad me, I have a sense of humor.

If you have a sense of humor too, have some time to kill, may be entertained by some of the posts, don't mind your posts being found entertaining and are interested in sharing some of "YOUR RULES!!!" I invite you toss in some posts.

You may even have heard of or had imposed on you some "interesting" or "debatable" rules. Perhaps.

After consultation with wifey we found the only rule aboard our boat was/is....the captain has the final say. Oh, no shoes unless it's cold....yup, cold toes suck, even a big tough fellow like myself hates cold toesies!

I picture captains strutting up and down the dock, riding crop under the arm stating " thou shalt not... etc etc " I know it's not the case, but thats just what my mind pictures. Huh?

Anyhow, post away.

PS; thin skinned folks may not wish to participate, and thats fine....seriously, no hard feelings or name calling eh?
So, Oct 2018, it appears that you are writing a book, and need free info from experienced sailors on a cruising forum. That's my guess. Care to fess up?

A friend of mine is a salesman at a famous Harley shop in Los Angeles. He told me that one day he got a very long and strange "sales call", and that the supposed "buyer" was asking a bunch of non-regular questions. After 15 minutes, my friend asked "Do you want to buy a Harley?" The caller replied "No, I'm writing a Hollywood movie script, and just need to know some info."
hahaha ... true story.

Hey man, tell me all your experiences at sea, with photos too, please!
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Old 19-12-2018, 12:36   #10
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Rule Number One: Stay on the boat.
Rule Number Two: See Rule Number One.
Rule Number Three: No walking on water, it tends to start religions.
Rule Number Four: No swimming without a lifeguard. (Which we don't have.)

Pretty flexible about all the rest.
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Old 19-12-2018, 12:40   #11
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by hellosailor View Post
Rule Number One: Stay on the boat.
Rule Number Two: See Rule Number One.
Rule Number Three: No walking on water, it tends to start religions.
Rule Number Four: No swimming without a lifeguard. (Which we don't have.)

Pretty flexible about all the rest.
hahahaha

Rule Number One: A boat is a hole in the water into which one pours money.
Rule Number Two: I have no idea, as I'm too old to remember.
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Old 19-12-2018, 13:13   #12
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Boat: allied 39
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by PortClydeMe View Post
So, Oct 2018, it appears that you are writing a book, and need free info from experienced sailors on a cruising forum. That's my guess. Care to fess up?

A friend of mine is a salesman at a famous Harley shop in Los Angeles. He told me that one day he got a very long and strange "sales call", and that the supposed "buyer" was asking a bunch of non-regular questions. After 15 minutes, my friend asked "Do you want to buy a Harley?" The caller replied "No, I'm writing a Hollywood movie script, and just need to know some info."
hahaha ... true story.

Hey man, tell me all your experiences at sea, with photos too, please!


LOL, a book. How to get on the NY times worst sellers list.

No not writing a book. I made a comment on another thread that I was surprised at the number of rules folks seem to impose on their boats and I found some of them entertaining.....which I do.
Well, cant have that can we? Nope!
So someone gets their panties in a twist and starts throwing labels about...which I truly don't care about...best just to wander away.
To here.
Hence my original post about the the thin skinned welcome to not participate.
As for your assertion that I am no sailor.....well I am absolutely disgusted and offended and....and......HOW DARE YOU!!!!

Um, I am not going to prove anything to anyone, don't need to. Besides, I have no idea how to post photos.

However, an abridged version would be:
Bought 25 ft hunter in Utila Honduras around 98, while working as Padi (produce another dopey instructor, thats me!) instructor.
Bought allied 39 in 2000, basically a wreck.
Rebiult (still haven't finnished....only us true sailors know how that goes) her while running a marine repair business in NY.
Took her south in winters and north back to business in NY till about 2008.
Headed off cruising about 08, rammed in Mex (don't get me started!!) stayed around western carribean (no not the dulce) then did first single handed roatan to St Aug 2012.
Daydream lives on mooring but gets out as we can. Last run was singlehand to Utila for 11 days diving then back in May (Happy 50th to me!!)



Saltier than some , less than others.

So, enough with that......give me a laugh.....tell me how everyone aboard your boat must........?? No toilet paper in the head?? Just put it in your pocket. LOL.

I was just looking for some entertainment.....and the "piss in the cockpit" certainly filled that niche.
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Old 19-12-2018, 14:05   #13
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by GordMay View Post
Ok, but no mast rules, they're over the top.
Oh, and no keel rules, they’re beneath us.

The three unwritten rules of life:
1.
2.
3.

1. The Female always makes THE RULES.
2. THE RULES are subject to change without notice.
3. No Male can possible know all THE RULES.
4. If the Female suspects the Male knows all THE RULES, she must immediately change some of THE RULES.
5. The Female is never wrong.
6. If it appears the Female is wrong, it is because of a flagrant misunderstanding caused by something the Male did or said wrong.
7. If Rule #6 applies, the Male must apologize immediately for causing the misunderstanding.
8. The Female can change her mind at any time.
9. The Male must never change his mind without the express, written consent of The Female.
10. The Female has every right to be angry or upset at any time.
11. The Male must remain calm at all times, unless the Female wants him to be angry or upset.
12. The Female must, under no circumstances, let the Male know whether she wants him to be angry or upset.
13. The Male is expected to read the mind of the Female at all times.
14. At all times, what is important is what the Female meant, not what she said.
15. If the Male doesn't abide by THE RULES, it is because he can't take the heat, lacks backbone, and is a wimp.
16. If the Female has PMS, all THE RULES are null and void and the Male must cater to her every whim.
17. Any attempt to document THE RULES could result in bodily harm.
18. If the Male, at any time, believes he is right, he must refer to Rule #5.
If a male makes a decision and there is no female to hear; is it still wrong?
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Old 19-12-2018, 14:34   #14
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Boat: allied 39
Posts: 118
Re: Whats the RULES!!

These women rules actually reminds me of a rule on Daydream that I forgot....sorry.
Toilet seat left up...always.
Reasoning.....if something is amiss and the "head syphon,,,, argh" scenario actually occurs.....it's becomes obvious faster.

So, doh, there was more than one rule aboard. Bugger , I really have to include the no pissing in the cockpit drain...argh....three!

Iam fast becoming one of the "rules boats".......NOOOOOOOOOO!
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Old 19-12-2018, 18:17   #15
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Re: Whats the RULES!!

More women rules:

Ive crewed on more than one boat that had an "everyone sits to pee" rule. Reason being that many men are not very accurate...especially with any significant sea state.

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