Crew Wanted: Gay sail Phuket Thailand from Philippines Fall 2018

[pbmaise]

Thank you all for your concerns and good intentions. For the record this is an international cruising trip and not a charter based from one port on a day sail. I have sailed and lived at a marina in Malaysia for several years and sailed in and out of Brunei three times. I have even met the Sultan of Brunei and can show you the hidden places Muslims go to drink and smoke. I myself don't drink or smoke. None of literature describes an illegal activity. When well known gay celebrities travel to places like Malaysia they are not arrested just because they are gay. Perhaps they would be if they were on Grindr and hiring gay prostitutes.

PS I never have been anywhere where I saw more guys holding hands than Brunei.

PPS Just remembered the woman who swam at the marina in front of all the guys on the patrol boat. When she went swimming she wore a great big smile. They never arrested her. But no worries I would never attempt that.

[atoll]

Originally Posted by pbmaise

Thank you all for your concerns and good intentions. For the record this is an international cruising trip and not a charter based from one port on a day sail. I have sailed and lived at a marina in Malaysia for several years and sailed in and out of Brunei three times. I have even met the Sultan of Brunei and can show you the hidden places Muslims go to drink and smoke. I myself don't drink or smoke. None of literature describes an illegal activity. When well known gay celebrities travel to places like Malaysia they are not arrested just because they are gay. Perhaps they would be if they were on Grindr and hiring gay prostitutes.

PS I never have been anywhere where I saw more guys holding hands than Brunei.

PPS Just remembered the woman who swam at the marina in front of all the guys on the patrol boat. When she went swimming she wore a great big smile. They never arrested her. But no worries I would never attempt that.

Your Circus,Your Monkeys!,just beware,ignorance of the law is no defence,although westeners seem to get away with a lot due to skin colour

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/w...-a8206941.html

Discrimination against lesbian and gay people is widespread in Malaysia, where same-sex activity between men is illegal and is punished by whipping and up to 20 years in jail.

[belizesailor]

Originally Posted by Sojourner

My wife and our partner are both (mostly) lesbian, so choice of travel destination always highly ranks LGBT friendliness. Of those places, some parts of Indonesia and these days, certainly most of Malaysia, is firmly off our itinerary. Philippines I don't know, but mostly christian does not = tolerance always for me.

Whether or not you can be PROVEN / caught in the act of being gay is up to the individual who is watching you or saw someone holding hands or looking a certain way. It is absolutely something the OP needs to consider as does any crew looking to sign up. They can and do put gay people in jails officially in some parts of that area, and even if they don't, the opinion of the general population is negative enough that we don't care about officialdom at all.... a few drunk locals can really ruin your day entirely off the books. Interestingly, traveling in some more laid back muslim countries gets me a lot of compliments on my 'wives' [emoji3]

Your wife and your partner are mostly gay? Where do you, presumaby male, fit it? (None of my business really, just an unusual statment). My step daughter and her partner are also both (mostly) gay.

Regardless, its my perception at least that many venues are more tolerant of female homosexuality than male.

Not to get us back in a religious debate, but this is relavant to the proposed cruising destinations, both Islam and Christianity strongly condem male homosexuality, but to my knowledge neither even mentions female homosexuality.

[Sojourner]

Originally Posted by belizesailor

Your wife and your partner are mostly gay? Where do you, presumaby male, fit it? (None of my business really, just an unusual statment). My step daughter and her partner are also both (mostly) gay.

Regardless, its my perception at least that many venues are more tolerant of female homosexuality than male.

Not to get us back in a religious debate, but this is relavant to the proposed cruising destinations, both Islam and Christianity strongly condem male homosexuality, but to my knowledge neither even mentions female homosexuality.

If I minded the question I wouldn't have volunteered the info. They're gay, I'm the exception, and we've all been together a very long time. As for lesbians being treated 'better', there is a nasty little thing called curative rape in a surprisingly large amount of (mostly African) countries. As well as little nuggets like this:

https://www.theguardian.com/world/20...lgbt-checklist

So yeah, the political situation is probably quite important for someone sailing or traveling in some of these areas, especially since the OP is talking about a gay male cruise...

[belizesailor]

Originally Posted by Sojourner

If I minded the question I wouldn't have volunteered the info. They're gay, I'm the exception, and we've all been together a very long time. As for lesbians being treated 'better', there is a nasty little thing called curative rape in a surprisingly large amount of (mostly African) countries. As well as little nuggets like this:

https://www.theguardian.com/world/20...lgbt-checklist

So yeah, the political situation is probably quite important for someone sailing or traveling in some of these areas, especially since the OP is talking about a gay male cruise...

Yes, unfortunately there is no shortage of hate cloaked in piousness...and always has been.

[windycityxx]

How many hours per day and per week are you asking of your crew?

What is the pay per day, week etc.?

[JPA Cate]

Some people thought it was I who closed this thread for a while, but it was not me. I would leave a little note about why in blue print. Just so's y'all know.

Ann

[pbmaise]

Originally Posted by windycityxx

How many hours per day and per week are you asking of your crew?

What is the pay per day, week etc.?

OMG A legitimate question and relevant too.

When sailing, I, my husband, and you would be sharing cooking and cleaning duties. So that would mean about 3 hours per day. We also share watch keeping with guests. Figure about 3 hours a day. Total 6

In Port there is a lot of work to do to shop, laundry, and provision. These days also require watching guests get on and off. On these days time may go over 8 hours.

In bad weather there is no such thing as a clock.

I don't consider joining the group to see a national park or eating dinner working, however since you would be expected to come to shore for these type of activities you might.

I once had a crew member who was double club foot and afraid to come to shore and be seen in public. When I met him, I realized no one had ever given him a chance. His English was good and the idea came to mind he would make a good worker and my vessel was big enough for someone on two crutches. I was right. The only accommodation I had to make was buy him new crutches with rubber tips. He greatly stressed out my guests aboard who tried to get him to shore for dinner. So if there is dinner on shore, it is mandatory unless you have a good excuse like he did.

Note: If a guest is nervous about going to shore alone, it is good if one of us, and that includes you, volunteer to go along. A guest is expected to pay for your meals and transportation on shore. I personally don't consider this working, however some people might.

I want to relate your question back to a crew member I once had on board. I consider what occured to be an example of one of the differences, albeit a stereotype, between the average male and average female crew member.

And please let's not launch into differences between men and women sailors. I am trying to explain what work means to me so you get a good idea if this is the right kind of boat for you.

We were painting the decks with epoxy paint. She announced right in the middle of a batch she had put in her "fair share of work" and was going to go read her book.

When I said you just can't stop painting epoxy paint since it reacts, she said well that is a stupid kind of paint and I should have planned ahead.

The stereotypical male crew member I have experience with would never abandon a project midway especially if the captain was still working.

This reminds me I seem to have a social defect around certain types of people.

For me, there is no such thing as day or night when we are underway. I am physically present in the cockpit nearly almost all 24 hours and still listening intently even when asleep. I usually wake up and know there has been a change in the wind before the crew member on watch has even realized it.

When coming into the galley in the morning, and I usually solo watch from 4 am till 9 am, I have a terrible habit. I fail to say to everyone a cheerful good morning I hope you all had a pleasant sleep. How are you all doing this fine day? Any interesting dreams? Instead I have a terrible habit of interrupting a conversation in progress and informing people what is expected to be done.

One female informed me she never met anyone more "self-absorbed" than me. I still wonder if she never met a man who wasn't interested in her. I admit it. I had zero interest in her. I never asked how she was feeling, didn't care about her past, and didn't want to know her plans. I was only interested in the work to be done.

Male crew members tend to see the fact that I am still working as an indication that they should still be working too. And here is where your answer gets difficult. I work a lot. Even right now I am working. I am recruiting someone who is reading this.

I am looking for someone who enjoys working, who prides themselves on learning, and doesn't consider sailing to be a 9-5 job. One of the most disgusting person I ever met was a government employee who said he left his house at 8:45 am sharp, arrived at his job 8:55 am and was back home by 5:10 pm. Bakersfield CA post office. Remind me never to go there. I won't forget.

Pay,

As stated in first post the amount I can afford to pay will depend on how many people are interested in being guests. My leading candidate is right now from Turkey. He grew up in a boat yard, spent his early life building and repairing vessels, and has extensive experience delivering million dollar yachts. He even included the word carpentry in his letter. Now that word alone means far more to me than all the fancy sailing and yachting certificates some people tout. He said I sound like exactly the type of person he would want to work for.

He is anxious to get away from the Med and type of people that cruise the Med. And, yes, based on his name and Country I did confirm he knows I am gay. And no, I didn't ask what his religion was nor did I ask if he was gay. But he did volunteer that he was not.

Now where was I, right pay. Likely I would pay this guy from Turkey double what I would pay an American who was only a licensed captain with clean unbroken fingernails.

I have a few months to find enough guys to help pay for a wage that attracts this person away from the Med.

This said, I know someone like him likely will be in demand so I must continue recruiting until I have confirmation and evidence someone is really coming.

Clear?

[pbmaise]

Another relevant and good question was why do we clean the bottom weekly.

When barnacles are about the size of a grain of sand they come off with a soft plastic scrapper which doesn't damage the bottom paint. If you wait two weeks a barnacle adheres to the paint strongly enough that you pull off paint too when scraping them away.

I do not have illegal chemicals in my paint and even when new still cleaned it regularly. Brackish water in Malaysia was the worst. The growth was called hermissenda crassicornis nudibranchs.

It is a big vessel with a total 300 linear feet of water line. We scrap every inch and check to see if the vessel is smooth as a baby's butt when finished.

Speaking of which it is 6:45 am and time to clean. It is best to do so before the wind comes up and waves begin. It is just me today. So back in few hours. Remember don't feed any trolls.

[pbmaise]

I now have a YouTube video for my boat and the trips in Thailand. I again thank everyone for their cautions.

I have gone back over my marketing materials for my trip from Philippines to Thailand and eliminated the word gay completely. So far more women have expressed an interest in that trip. I am just women safe to be around. Lol.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?list=LL_...&v=b_i6AKeokCc

[Pelagic]

For some reason, your video will not open for me?

It's good that you are openly describing your personal style and needs when it comes to crew interaction and your personal high commitment to this lifestyle.

It is easy to see that you are "driven" by this dream and expect no slackers, or those less committed for the duration of their stay.

That honesty is to be comended! Best of luck in your journey

[tatomaceda]

Originally Posted by Sojourner

My wife and our partner are both (mostly) lesbian, so choice of travel destination always highly ranks LGBT friendliness. Of those places, some parts of Indonesia and these days, certainly most of Malaysia, is firmly off our itinerary. Philippines I don't know, but mostly christian does not = tolerance always for me.

I grew up in the Philippines, and am planning to retire there in 2 years... The Philippines, though mostly Christian and predominantly Catholic, are not a homophobic lot. Very accepting, almost unconsciously, and non-judgemental culture.

Check this recent article on gender equality:
https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2013/...-in-the-world/

You should definitely visit.

[Pelagic]

Originally Posted by tatomaceda

I grew up in the Philippines, and am planning to retire there in 2 years... The Philippines, though mostly Christian and predominantly Catholic, are not a homophobic lot. Very accepting, almost unconsciously, and non-judgemental culture.

Check this recent article on gender equality:
https://www.weforum.org/agenda/2013/...-in-the-world/

You should definitely visit.

Interesting link, but I think misleading when it comes to the Philippines.
A country that I love and has been a residence for 17 years.

Generally Speaking:
The strength of this country lies in their woman. Incredibly hard working, used to looking after their spoiled brothers, lazy husbands and often single mothers, they sacrifice a great deal as overseas workers and immigrants, to look after extended families back in the Philippines.

The men, spoiled in childhood, are very chauvinistic, laws still punish women unequally and they do not permit divorce, making it very difficult and expensive for a woman to gain her freedom from a lazy, cheating husband.

Filipino woman are successful in the Philippines, not because of any social enlightenment, but because they work very hard to achieve their goals.
Same reason why the Chinese Filipino family is more affluent and successful.

On the Gay attitude, country is very accepting of all sexual orientations.

Transgender "Baclas" are so numerous and celebrated, they could be considered a third gender.

[jjlyons]

PbMaise,

I am very interested in supplying my time and skills for your cruise. I am a young captain (28) and have grown up commercial fishing on my families trawler out of Gloucester, MA, USA. I have been a liveaboard for 6 years, 100 ton master for 3 and owned and operated a marine maintenance business all in Alaska.

I as a single male that identifies as heterosexual have no fear of traveling and working with and around men who identify as homosexual. I appreciate the most in my work place, openness of the requirements of my duties, the condition of the vessel, and that our captain and itinerary are prudent.

Reading through some of these previous posts I have become sick to my stomach that there are so many that are intolerant here or even care what the sexual orientation of others is.

If you are still looking for crew and would like to continue a conversation please PM me.

Cheers
Jamie

[mud bug]

My point is I don't care what someones orientation is! But I also don't understand why some feel it's necessary to even bring it up and advertise it. Most alternative persons I know seem to have a propensity to bring up their sexuality at every opportunity. I really don't care to hear it! I don't go around proclaiming my hetero life style. It's no ones business. I wish that others would do the same.