Why people may not help you!

[peter57]

Originally Posted by Stu Jackson

There is another way we all help, every day:

This Forum!!!

Don't know how many times I've posted my

Electrical Systems 101 Electrical Systems 101

And so many others help those who start off by sayin': " I don't know nothin' 'bout 'lektricity..."

None of us was born an electrician, but we're all willing to HELP.

OHM'S LAW

[rhubstuff]

I once towed an experienced, well-known sea-going author back to his marina after his motorsailer's engine failed in 25-30 kt. winds. (We weren't having any fun out there either.) He paid our marina bill, cooked us a beautiful dinner, and we made friends for life. Sorry the poster had such bad luck, but mostly, sailors are good people. Actually, most people are good people. Please don't let ignoramuses and a couple of jerks ruin your day.

[senormechanico]

Originally Posted by Mike OReilly

This also explains why small towns or communities tend to be more civil places compared to larger urban areas — people actually have a connection to each other. It also goes a long way to explaining why there is a correlation (causation) between wealth and dickishness. Very wealthy folk are able to live quite isolated from the rest of the masses. And they don’t need other people to help them get along in life. All this weakens the social connections between economic classes.

Not always.
We have good friends who have "More money Than God".
They anonymously donate to Do Good, and will help anyone with a good cause or need (my wife and me included).
Our little island is much the better for their help.

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by senormechanico

Not always.
We have good friends who have "More money Than God".
They anonymously donate to Do Good, and will help anyone with a good cause or need (my wife and me included).
Our little island is much the better for their help.

Good to hear SM. Doesn’t change the research on the subject — lots exists (Ken, you listening too?). I suggest taking some time to read it.

[meatservo]

Bullsh*t flag on the play Mike, I can come up with statistical data to the contrary...

As a human being, you have a sense of the pulse of life as it happens around you, be a scientist, that's great. The real world around us defies this mantra of you are smarter than the the rest of us. You have no quantitative analysis to recon with the human emotions of faith, hope, compassion and love...


meatservo

[Mike OReilly]

Originally Posted by meatservo

Bullsh*t flag on the play Mike, I can come up with statistical data to the contrary...

As a human being, you have a sense of the pulse of life as it happens around you, be a scientist, that's great. The real world around us defies this mantra of you are smarter than the the rest of us. You have no quantitative analysis to recon with the human emotions of faith, hope, compassion and love...

I have no idea what you mean by "this mantra of you are smarter than the the rest of us.” Please explain. And I’ve said nothing about faith, hope or love. But if you bothered to follow the previous links I provided you’d see reference to experiments measure “compassion”.

I’m constantly amused by people who refuse to even look at data and research that challenges their cherished beliefs. Sorry to break it to you, but the scientific revolution has shown just how flawed using “the pulse of life as it happens around you” is as a guide to actual reality.

[DumnMad]

You can't categorise people by their wealth;

Some made it by working their butts off helping others, employing people, paying taxes etc and keeping general prosperity ticking over.

Others made it by exploitation of priviledge, overcharging, under paying, unjust legal action etc and generally making life difficult for others.

I'm hopeful that difficult to measure "law of karma" rewards the right one with happiness. :-)

[Nikki S]

I am sorry for your woes.
And grateful for the cruising community I have encountered, where the experience has overwhelmingly been one of generosity in time, knowledge and assistance. I recently posted that I love sailors because whenever we are doing work on the outside of our boat, they emerge from inside nearby vessels, just to offer their assistance. We too enjoy sharing information and lending a hand any way we can whenever the opportunity arises. As indeed it is an opportunity and has lead to an array wonderful friendships and adventures and a sense of community that is perhaps my favourite part of cruising.

[GordMay]

Originally Posted by fozrunner

I'd have to disagree with Boaty on this one.

Bikers still have a great sense of community, pretty much like most boaters. I ride a fancy adventure bike but still wave to other riders and they wave to me. Doesn't matter who they are, sport riders, harley guys and even the occasional scooter. If someone looks like they need help I pull over, and when I've been pulled over adjusting my gear lots of people have enquired if I'm OK, including cagers and truckers. This happens more often in remote areas and away from cities, where a cell phone call can solve a problem quickly.
There are many of instances of bikers getting into trouble in Alaska and elsewhere and the community almost immediately responds with offers of help, including use of tools, transport , accommodation and even trailering.

Sure there are people who don't fit the mould, both in biking and boating, but I firmly believe the good outweigh the bad by a long shot!

Bikers from the Freehold American Legion were riding after a Veterans Day event on Friday when Dan Barkalow said he saw a stranded motorcyclist up ahead near Allaire state park in Wall Township.

“Bikers gotta stick together,” Barkalow said. “I stopped to see if he needed help, and it was Bruce.”

Barkalow says they tried to help get his bike running, but when they couldn’t, Springsteen – wearing a brown riding jacket and a red handkerchief – hopped on the back of Ryan Bailey’s bike and they headed to a local bar.

➥ https://www.theguardian.com/music/20...-jersey-bikers

[Brewgyver]

Originally Posted by Stu Jackson

Yes.

For the OP, their, there, they're...

LOL, you beat me to it! Actually, I was trying to restrain myself, as many members here are not native English speaking. A bit more info in the profile is always helpful in that respect.

[jtsailjt]

Originally Posted by Kenomac

Have you ever actually lived right in the middle of a multicultural, multi-ethnic city? You know, people of all income levels and backgrounds living in close proximity? Well we do (past 11 years) and it's not like you describe at all. You have it all bassackwards.

When we lived out in country (17 years)... that's where we were surrounded by snobs, neighbors who didn't know each other, kids didn't play with each other etc.

The city is just the opposite, a place where people are somewhat forced to get along by their close proximity. Kinda like Sesame Street. Your neighbor's car gets stuck, you help dig them out of the snow etc. It's easy to do because you're right there.

There are nice generous wealthy people, as well as helpful lower income level folks. There are wealthy jerks and just as many poor jerks (eg: just check out any bar). There's no correlation between helpfullness and income, although some on this forum would like to think so.

I'm glad you and a few others have nipped the idea of poor people being more generous than more wealthy people in the bud. I guess it's considered fun for some people to encourage class warfare type thinking like that but I don't think it does anyone any good and instead only sows division. I too have seen all kinds of helpful and generous people and have never seen any correlation with how wealthy they are. I know that as my own financial situation has gradually improved over the years my ability to help out others has increased, but my attitude about doing it (an old habit) hasn't changed at all due to the fact that I now have more resources than I used to. I have noticed that since I'm now perceived by some as more well off, that 'some" people seem less likely to help out with something without expecting to be paid for that help, or the "good deal" they have been known to make available isn't available to me once they see my boat. But on the other hand I'm more aware of exactly what needs to be done and have developed relationships with people who treat me very well, knowing they'll never get burned by me and they can totally trust me, or maybe they're just generous, good hearted people to everyone. So, I guess it can work both ways.

I do know that on the water I'm pretty spring loaded to help anyone in need that I run across, but on land I tend to be a just a slight bit more cautious before extending a hand. That may have something to do with the last hitch hiker I picked up many years ago on a very cold, dark night in a remote area pulling out a roofing knife and clicking the blade out and then remarking "sounds just like a switchblade doesn't it?" So on land I still try to be helpful but I now take a moment to consider what I'm potentially getting myself into first. But still, just a couple years ago, I was the only one who stopped and got out of my car and dragged the very drunk and filthy older native American woman who had just passed out in the middle of a downtown intersection over to the sidewalk and sat her up against a building until a police officer arrived. There were lots of other people watching and nobody seemed interested in getting involved, but I don't think it's a country/city thing at all, just the way people see their place in the world and relation to others they may not know or seem to have anything in common with.

[CShawn]

Not a boating story, but it happened to me. Growing up my dad would stop to assist anyone on the side of the road, and always refused payment. He would just tell them to assist a stranded person in the future. He passed that attitude on to me.

I was with my wife heading home one night when I noticed someone stranded with a flat. I got out and it was three college girls with no clue. I changed it and then when I was putting everything back in the car, I noticed that they were all three huddled together digging money out of their purses. I quickened my pace and told them I was done and to have a good night. I managed to get halfway to our car when they ran towards me yelling "Here, let us pay you!" I politely refused and kept walking. They caught up and tried to put it in my pocket. (Not a dream, promise.) I refused a second time, but they were persistent. I thought it best to reduce the pants probing and took the money, letting my dad down in the process. I got back to the car, and my wife said "What the hell was that all about!??!" She was not happy.

Sometimes, no good dead goes unpunished. I have a few road stories, but for another time.

[DumnMad]

Haha CShawn.

Repost in the joke thread :-)

[rognvald]

Originally Posted by jtsailjt

I'm glad you and a few others have nipped the idea of poor people being more generous than more wealthy people in the bud. I guess it's considered fun for some people to encourage class warfare type thinking like that but I don't think it does anyone any good and instead only sows division. I too have seen all kinds of helpful and generous people and have never seen any correlation with how wealthy they are. I know that as my own financial situation has gradually improved over the years my ability to help out others has increased, but my attitude about doing it (an old habit) hasn't changed at all due to the fact that I now have more resources than I used to. I have noticed that since I'm now perceived by some as more well off, that 'some" people seem less likely to help out with something without expecting to be paid for that help, or the "good deal" they have been known to make available isn't available to me once they see my boat. But on the other hand I'm more aware of exactly what needs to be done and have developed relationships with people who treat me very well, knowing they'll never get burned by me and they can totally trust me, or maybe they're just generous, good hearted people to everyone. So, I guess it can work both ways.

I do know that on the water I'm pretty spring loaded to help anyone in need that I run across, but on land I tend to be a just a slight bit more cautious before extending a hand. That may have something to do with the last hitch hiker I picked up many years ago on a very cold, dark night in a remote area pulling out a roofing knife and clicking the blade out and then remarking "sounds just like a switchblade doesn't it?" So on land I still try to be helpful but I now take a moment to consider what I'm potentially getting myself into first. But still, just a couple years ago, I was the only one who stopped and got out of my car and dragged the very drunk and filthy older native American woman who had just passed out in the middle of a downtown intersection over to the sidewalk and sat her up against a building until a police officer arrived. There were lots of other people watching and nobody seemed interested in getting involved, but I don't think it's a country/city thing at all, just the way people see their place in the world and relation to others they may not know or seem to have anything in common with.

Very well said, JT! Good luck and safe sailing.

[rognvald]

"I’m constantly amused by people who refuse to even look at data and research that challenges their cherished beliefs. Sorry to break it to you, but the scientific revolution has shown just how flawed using “the pulse of life as it happens around you” is as a guide to actual reality.," Mike O'Reilly



Mike,
As you well know, research is a double-edged sword. It depends on who is doing the research. In the History of the World, "knowledge" is always a tug of war between the ying and the yang. Good luck and safe sailing.