I think there are a few issues here.
1. It is quite common to find many married people unhappy that their wives do not share their dream of cruising or even sailing much at all. That is an area in itself. What they find pleasurable or attractive and different aspirations at different ages are factors.
2. Wanting a cruising partner. Talk of sailing the world or even out of sight of land is a substantial leap for someone who is unsure of their interest and capacity for sailing, let alone in you, and for most I think baby steps are required. The other aspect is in effect being captive in a confined space with someone one hasn't built a relationship with. This can be difficult as a male crew, let alone with someone who has romantic or sexual expectations. One can't blame women for being wary.
3. Forming a relationship generally. Hormones and common ties or shared lifestyle goals help with this at younger ages. Attraction, sex, bonding, and usually a home and family
are the usual longer term pattern but not inevitably. However in the older age groups it changes rather. Looks fade, hormones are less dominant, children
grow up, and the focus at a different life cycle stage changes. For a man it may be less of career and more on other ways of self fulfillment. For many women perhaps they want to fulfill themselves in a different way. Those who work through this have an advantage of bonding built through a long time of shared experiences. The importance of looks fades, in the sense that the sixty year old may remain attractive subjectively though she hardly remains a twenty year old.
4. However a new start is another ballgame. Having been long divorced I have had the opportunity to observe the mating game
. I claim no expertise so just my observations.
The Don Juan game
is not for me but I have observed those adept at it who "score" easily. One acquaintance keeps a few on the go at a time, despite being otherwise unremarkable. What seems to be the key is being in to win and not being too discerning. As explained to me the key was to look them in the eye and tell them what they want to hear. That smacks of manipulation but the subsequent flirtation game seems to me to involve a suspension of disbelief.
Obviously sexual attraction or "chemistry" is a starting point but one might if looking for a partner want to establish more in a variety of ways other than "You Jane, me Tarzan."
These days there are various shopping
markets, the internet
, agencies, singles nights etc. I notice that many women, and I suppose men
though I have not studied them, have rather exacting specifications or even fantasies. Many older women seem to want men
up to ten years younger. So if women say 55 want guys 40- 52 and those guys want women of 30-45 there could be a problem. No wonder many lie about their age or post photos that are twenty years old. I guess that helps get some diverting and entertaining interest but hardly helps if they eventually meet.
I am sceptical about the wide choice supposedly offered by these methods. Sure they may offer a wider base, and eliminate many, however they don't allow for getting to know someone and having attraction develop.
I don't think there is an easy answer for older people. I think one has to be prepared to act quickly on occasion because there may not be a second chance. Be open and friendly and perhaps something will develop over time even if initially it seems less likely. There are also more fish
in the sea than in your bathtub.
Finally I think it is far too big a leap from maybe we could meet for a coffee to let's sail the seven seas.
On the other hand you are free and not entangled with someone else's life so life is different and not all bad.
Luck is a factor - so Good Luck.