Real Cruiser's Quiz: How do you stack up?

[Capt Phil]

Personally, I thought they were pretty funny and can recall seeing many of them over the years... Can't believe there are some posters here who take offence. They need to get out of their mothers basement and check out the real world! Phil

[oldragbaggers]

I actually laughed out loud a couple of times. I must be a horrible person.

[Cadence]

Originally Posted by oldragbaggers

I actually laughed out loud a couple of times. I must be a horrible person.

No, you just have a sense of humor.

[Tater Salad]

Originally Posted by SV Sailfish

And... if you have decided to buy a sailboat and go cruising, but the only way you can afford it is by asking for money on sites like Patreon, then please, please, please just stay home!

And yes... we know your girl looks really "hot" in that bikini but please just stay home anyway!

Lol...still the best one

[seaskip]

Originally Posted by Jason Flare

Try adding salt to the axle grease. Huge improvement.

Too true. In an emergency. On toast. And the reverse is true too. Try a dab of vegemite for all your engineering needs!😀

[Dockhead]

Originally Posted by valhalla360

Ehhh, we've lived aboard for a decade and have a few mile under our belts. Other than tying up the dingy most points were just the guy being a blowhard trying to prove he was a true cruiser and hoping everyone would agree with him.

...
+1

[Dockhead]

Originally Posted by bobnlesley

. . . Perhaps the degree of humour that one finds in this post might be is inversely proportional to the amount of times that you recognise yourself on the lists?

Actually, this kind of humor is typical of the kind of person who is immensely, inordinately proud of being one half step ahead of the newbies he is making fun of. Wow! I know how to pronounce "cay"! Just call me Old Salt, will you? Shiver me timbers!

This kind of snide glee, at the foibles of beginners, fades pretty quickly with a certain amount of actual experience. The whole idea of a "real cruiser", is not something which exists with actual real cruisers.

[Cadence]

Originally Posted by Dockhead

Actually, this kind of humor is typical of the kind of person who is immensely, inordinately proud of being one half step ahead of the newbies he is making fun of. Wow! I know how to pronounce "cay"! Just call me Old Salt, will you? Shiver me timbers!

This kind of snide glee, at the foibles of beginners, fades pretty quickly with a certain amount of actual experience. The whole idea of a "real cruiser", is not something which exists with actual real cruisers.

Don't you think this has been beat to death enough? Something posted is jest.

[Cheechako]

Originally Posted by bobnlesley

A bit harsh with item-7, we allow that flying a Jolly-Roger's acceptable if there are small kids aboard; then again, I hear that they taste like chicken too?

...20. Dinghy's with sun awnings over them don't keep you any cooler and certainly don't look cool
21.Tying your dinghy to the dock with a short painter, immediately beside the ladder, or better yet with a short painter at the bow and cable lock at the stern right across the ladder is not nice.
22. Similar to point-4, the speed you can zoom your rib through the moorings, especially whilst standing up holding on to the painter, is inversely proportional to the size of you sexual organ; sail all day at 5 knots, then scream the last half-mile at 15-20kts, WTF? The beer's not going to run out ashore if you're one minute later in getting there;, well OK, I concede that that's possible in Cuba.
23. If you don't want other yachts to anchor anywhere less than 300-400' in front of yours, then go to the upwind end of the anchorage.
24. Turn the music down.

"7. If you're a 68 year-old fat slob and you really think that the tall slim local, 20 year-old in the skimpy black dress is in love with you; that's just sad. Sober up big guy, she's younger than your daughter."

Yes on #7... why? Because all it takes is money. I see it often, especially Florida. I suppose these older fat guys in high end Mercedes attract these skinny built young girls down island... not sure.

[Sea Dreaming]

Originally Posted by Dockhead

Actually, this kind of humor is typical of the kind of person who is immensely, inordinately proud of being one half step ahead of the newbies he is making fun of. Wow! I know how to pronounce "cay"! Just call me Old Salt, will you? Shiver me timbers!

This kind of snide glee, at the foibles of beginners, fades pretty quickly with a certain amount of actual experience. The whole idea of a "real cruiser", is not something which exists with actual real cruisers.

Thank you.

[Rustic Charm]

Originally Posted by Dockhead

Actually, this kind of humor is typical of the kind of person who is immensely, inordinately proud of being one half step ahead of the newbies he is making fun of. Wow! I know how to pronounce "cay"! Just call me Old Salt, will you? Shiver me timbers!

This kind of snide glee, at the foibles of beginners, fades pretty quickly with a certain amount of actual experience. The whole idea of a "real cruiser", is not something which exists with actual real cruisers.

dockhead,

"The whole idea of a "real cruiser", is not something which exists with actual real cruisers"

I think the OP is fully conscious of this. That you don't grasp it, simply means you don't grasp the humour. Your reading it literally

Im more concerned that a moderator would want to, or appear to want to instigate conflict

[sailjumanji]

Originally Posted by Dockhead

Actually, this kind of humor is typical of the kind of person who is immensely, inordinately proud of being one half step ahead of the newbies he is making fun of. Wow! I know how to pronounce "cay"! Just call me Old Salt, will you? Shiver me timbers!

This kind of snide glee, at the foibles of beginners, fades pretty quickly with a certain amount of actual experience. The whole idea of a "real cruiser", is not something which exists with actual real cruisers.

YES. Thank you.

And for those that say "you just don't get the humor", move it to the joke thread and not the general sailing forum. Otherwise this makes real cruisers look like snobs. And the "real" cruisers I know are not.

[senormechanico]

Originally Posted by Sea Dreaming

Wow...nothing but hate. Truly not funny. There is nothing here that resembles humor.
Snobs are everywhere it seems. I guess you were born with a tiller in your hand and every skill you will ever need fresh out of the womb.
Maybe you could teach me a thing or two about sailing. Im sure you are much better at it than I am. But Ill stay away because its this kind of cynical attitude that sucks real joy out of life.
Chill...just chill. You will have more fun.

You could get a real lesson by going to Sailing Anarchy for awhile.

Get back to us after your visit.

[seaskip]

Originally Posted by Rustic Charm

dockhead,

"The whole idea of a "real cruiser", is not something which exists with actual real cruisers"

I think the OP is fully conscious of this. That you don't grasp it, simply means you don't grasp the humour. Your reading it literally

Im more concerned that a moderator would want to, or appear to want to instigate conflict

So true. We're all somewhere on the path and we all started at the start. That's not the point. It's funny. I can see myself in at least 6-7 of the first lists points. And it's still funny.
Rather than looking snobby for having a sense of humour,there's a possibility ( please? No offence) of being so damn politically correct, that you look like a humourless snob.

[Dockhead]

Originally Posted by Rustic Charm

. . . Im more concerned that a moderator would want to, or appear to want to instigate conflict

I am not posting in my capacity as a moderator.

Nor am I "instigating conflict". On the contrary, I am advocating showing respect for other people, even when making jokes. The fact that something is intended to be humorous, does not mitigate a put-down. The fact that something is intended to be humorous, or even if it is actually very funny, does not change the fact that the humor is mean-spirited, if that's what it is.