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Old 25-02-2008, 09:11   #16
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Take responsibility for what you are responsible for, and stop taking responsibility for what is not your responsibility. It’s that simple. Control what you can control, and let the rest go. It will relieve a great deal of your stress. Control stress by stressing control.

Stress response is triggered not so much by the demands people face, but by their beliefs that they will not be able to handle those demands as well as they would like to. When people encounter a demanding situation they tend to evaluate their ability to handle the situation and they speculate about the likely consequences. If the result leaves them confident about handling the situation, then stress levels usually are low. However, if they decide they will not be able to cope with the demand, and especially if not coping is believed to have unpleasant consequences, then stress levels will be high. The intensity of the stressful reaction will depend on the degree of imbalance between the demand and resources for coping, coupled with the perceived severity of the consequences.

But there is something you can do about it. When you have an ongoing stressful circumstance in your life, you can modify your level of responsibility. Either take more responsibility or less. Start by asking yourself, “Am I trying to control something I can’t or shouldn’t control?” or “Is there something I should take responsibility for that I have been leaving out of my control?”

If something is out of your control (or is none of your business, and you’ve been trying to make it your business), you will relieve yourself of a lot of stress by letting go of it. Recognize it’s out of your control, and busy yourself with things that are in your control.

Now, if you find something you should, and can, control; and haven’t been - roll up your sleeves, and get to work on solving the problem.
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Old 25-02-2008, 10:39   #17
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Gord, thanks for those words of wisdom.

Quote:
Take responsibility for what you are responsible for, and stop taking responsibility for what is not your responsibility. It’s that simple. Control what you can control, and let the rest go.
When I read this the first part of The Serenity Prayer came into mind.
Quote:
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
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Old 25-02-2008, 12:15   #18
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Originally Posted by shellback View Post
Kanani,

All this is stress in some shape or form, however I'm merely touching upon in my paper, the basics, the core of why do we as sailors enjoy getting aboard our boats at the end of a long day. Or what can be the physical and emotional benefits of boating which we enjoy and helps us enjoy life.

Thank you for your comments! We trade one vice for another don't we.

Very Respectfully,

Mark R.
Mark,

The difficulty that you are having, with your paper, may be due to a problem your premise.

Your premise seems to assume the same thing that many spectators assume. Most people see pictures of a sailboat gliding serenely across the water and the occupants have big, carefree smiles on their faces. Although this does occasionally happen during any given sailing experience, the fact is, most aspects of the activity are quite stressful.

I think that the "Thought" of sailing is quite soothing and rewarding because those thoughts are usually about the best parts of sailing.

I was a live-aboard sailor for many-many years. If I was at anchor, the best part of my day was coming home and relaxing in the cockpit, watching the sky, sea, birds and sunsets. When I went to bed at night (in a secure anchorage, good weather and no 2:AM surprises) I enjoyed the gentle movement of the boat as it responded to the water condition.

In the actual "Sailing" part of sailing, there is the preparation, setting the boat up for the day. There is reward in getting it right (punishment for getting it wrong). There is the maneuvering in close quarters that is rewarding if one has many years of experience but extremely stressful for those that don't.

Getting out on the water, enjoying the bird and sea-life. Interacting with nature in it's most primitive form, can be soothing and rewarding. If one does everything right in preparation and execution of the activity the reward and stress release can be great. However, (again) that comes with much experience and in the interim even the most basic maneuvers can be extremely stressful for some.

Perception is almost always different from reality. In fact, no 2 people's perception of any given situation is ever 100% the same but to each individual, their perception IS reality. This may be where you are having your difficulty with your concept of "sailing (the effect) it de-stresses the mind and body of the daily grind of life (the cause)". This is your perception. It is very difficult to relay this concept and certainly to prove this concept to a majority of readers. IMHO, I believe that the premise may be inherently flawed. That may be why you are having problems with it.

A better premise may be to write about how people "Perceive....'sailing (the effect) it de-stresses the mind and body of the daily grind of life' " but how in reality, it may be just the opposite and how sailing (and other similar activities) may actually accomplish the opposite of what a person may be trying to accomplish, at least for a substantial period of time.

Wayne
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Old 25-02-2008, 15:52   #19
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Originally Posted by Kanani View Post
stress is more about the person than it is about that person's job, family, environment and other outside influences. The stress does not subside because you "Change your life". That, in itself, is one of the most stressful things that you can do in your life. Think about all of the highest rated stress issues in life and that is what you do when you stop working and go cruising.
.... stress follows you if you don't learn to deal with it.
But I've found the same results. If you are stressed on land, chances are good you will be stressed at sea. about whatever.
though I do also believe that land life in general is more stressful.

Quote:
Originally Posted by GordMay View Post
Take responsibility for what you are responsible for, and stop taking responsibility for what is not your responsibility. It’s that simple. Control what you can control, and let the rest go. It will relieve a great deal of your stress. Control stress by stressing control.
I completely agree with this. and I think a person who experiences a lot of stress would agree too. but in my experience, words are a lot easier that actions. people are hard to change.



personally cruising makes me feel good, because I conserve water, electricity, and produce much less garbage. This makes me feel like i'm living a "greener" lifestyle, although that didn't influence my decision to move aboard in anyway.

I've also found that cruising gives more meaning to my life. almost everything in my old life could be put off. on a boat, there are less tasks, of greater importance.
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Old 24-03-2008, 19:32   #20
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I find that I start smilling when the wind is perfect on my sails and laughing out loud just after it got dangerous ...the second time.

Don't have anything in my shore life like it! Must be why I have 3 boats
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