Regarding the boom sitting in your lap, maybe it's just affectionate. But seriously, you're missing your topping lift
. As you google
"topping lift" to get an ideal of how you'll want to rig yours, you'll discover that it's a line that runs from the top of your mast
to the aft and of your boom. Keeps the boom from falling.
You could have a topping lift
that goes from the end of your boom, to the top of the mast
, through a sheeve, down to the base of the mast ,where it could terminate at a cleat, or you could have a block at the end bottom of the mast, and run the line to the cockpit
where it would terminate at a cleat or other piece of hardware
of your choosing.
Me, I'd just run it from the top of the mast to the end of the boom, and keep it simple. One way is just to have a cleat on the boom to allow you to vary the length of the topping lift, depending on whether you're under sail (keep it longer so as to avoid fouling the leach of the sail and/or having your boom too high), or shorter (when your not sailing and you'd like the boom a little higher so it's not in your way).