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BlackOak · 19-03-2013, 09:39

Alot of truths presented here. On my limited travels in my man cave boat, ofcourse I sleep alone, I did see on many occasions in the anchorages, old men with only their dog, on their man cave boats. In the marinas, I saw old men with nice boats with a woman, and sometimes a little boat pet.

So if ya got money to spend on a nice boat, can afford marina slip fees, you most likely will have a significant other along. I say significant other because I did encounter 2 lesbians on a 30 footer sailing south together.

In conclusion, if ya gots a nice boat, ya got a woman....or if your a lesbian and ona not so nice boat, ya still can get a woman. If you're guy sailing a man cave, then ya got a dog. So either buy a nice boat, or be happy with a bow wow, and sail on.

barnakiel · 19-03-2013, 09:46

It is a huge subject and will escape all generalizations.

If we were to generalize ... then the answer would be positive.

Then, think about it this way: do you see more women boat images or more black men boat images? And so now: is it a 'male-cave' or is it rather a 'white-cave'.

And so on and forth, ad infinitum.

Good question with many answers.

b.

sailorboy1 · 19-03-2013, 09:50

Quote:

Originally Posted by SaltyMonkey

Choose your partner well.

And then let her choose the boat!

But then there may be something wrong with me because I wanted the same things that everyone talks about as women wanting. When I took her to see our boat there wasn't any doubt in my mind she was going to like it. Some of you guys need to change your gym socks more often so you understand that the boat is not suppose to smell the same way! Women don't want to smell your dirty socks and don't want to live in a boat that smells the same.

mbianka · 19-03-2013, 10:31

Hard to make generalizations as there are some woman here who are owners of their own boats and lives. I don't think of my boat as a man cave. I do think of it as a freedom machine to get away from a lot of the nonsense on land. I lived and work in New York back in the 1990's. The difference between walking down the streets of the city and walking the dock out to my boat was night and day. Most people get caught up into their day to day routines and never get to experience the pleasure of being out on a boat for an extended period of time. But, then I am comfortable with my solitude. Also some woman tend to be gabbers and need some social interaction with other woman. I think men not so much. They get pleasure and satisfaction working by themselves on projects either in the garage or on board and don't feel the need for constant social interaction. That may also why a boat appeals more to men.

David_Old_Jersey · 19-03-2013, 10:45

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlackOak

In conclusion, if ya gots a nice boat, ya got a woman....or if your a lesbian and ona not so nice boat, ya still can get a woman. If you're guy sailing a man cave, then ya got a dog. So either buy a nice boat, or be happy with a bow wow, and sail on.

I think that you are very perceptive.......or is it just nosey?

IMO every fella needs a shed

(whether physically or mentally), the trick is not to ask yer Missus to move into it as that kinda takes the fun away

..........for both sides

.

Of course exceptions do apply - in the genders of both sexes

.........and no doubt we shall hear more from them as the thread develops

.

nimblemotors · 19-03-2013, 10:54

That is a good generalization. A sailing boat as a home is indeed a 180 from a traditional home that many women aspire to. Asking the women to pick the boat is a great way to make sure you don't get one! A Catamaran is most definitely not as much a ManCave as a mono.

I am building a 38ft Cat, and yesterday was showing my women pictures of other cats,
and the ones she REALLY likes (hint hint) are the BIG ONES, like 50-60ft....

JackB

SaltyMonkey · 19-03-2013, 11:03

Its all a matter of the interior

**boatman61** · 19-03-2013, 11:04

I think we should broaden things a bit here...
There's marina folk... and there's sailing folk...
Marina folk are where they've tried and reached a compromise... both have what they need.. he's got the cave.. she got the semblance or normality along with bohemia... great for street cred..

Sailing folk are where they they say... 'So far... So good..'

90% of men who sail will never take their boats more than 100 miles from home port and sleep on land or in a marina 48 weeks of the year.. they'll talk world cruise but it'll never happen.. and the wive's know it. Another 9% travel all over.. sometimes solo.. sometimes in company..
1 % will always be solo... thats the source and continuation of the legend of a woman in every port... best of all worlds...

I do feel that if a woman walks away its for one of three reasons...
1/ She's decided she's where its at to start achieving her own dreams.. 'I've given your life a go... its not enough, I'm going home..' Usually returns to Uni or starts a business.. No hard feelings either way and the relationship sometimes continues successfully..
2/ The guy she's with is an ******* who screams, panic's and blames everyone else... (amazingly I've seen these pairs carry on for a surprisingly long time)... so she go's to visit Mom and never comes back.
3/ She's been taken past her comfort zone.. coast hopping fine... a Trans-Atlantic/Pacific and 20-30+ days of rolling nausea and stress leads to the 'Caribbean Holler'... 'Thats it.. I'm going home... sell it, sail it back I don't care but you've 6mths to do it.. or I want a divorce..'
Thats how I got my Bene' 321 in St Martin.. French couple with reason number 3
My 0.02centimes..

**boatman61** · 19-03-2013, 11:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by SaltyMonkey

Its all a matter of the interior

And Salty lays the bait.....

SailPenelope · 19-03-2013, 11:32

Generalizing, of course......

I think men look at the sailing.....women look at the homeyness........

Someone posted a link to the Benetaau 50......of the nine photos.......8 were exterior....only one interior....and it didn't include the galley.......who are they appealing to?

I'm the woman and this is my boat. My husband comes along for the ride. We find that actually makes for a pretty even distribution! He was a power-boater.....but he's gotten into the sailing. It works.

I get scared sailing sometimes......and often, just in anticipation. On my own boat, and yes, I chose this. So, I admit, I'm happiest, tied to the dock, and making a home aboard. And what a joy it is! Beautiful surroundings, a (delightful) challenge in making a small space feel big (not too much stuff, making what you do have do double duty). Husband knows where his bread is buttered.....recently converted from CNG to propane (including new stove) and replaced galley faucet thus restoring hot water flow..........

It helps that we have a beautiful boat.......that I enjoy restoring.......

Andrew Troup · 19-03-2013, 11:58

Hmm - while the generalisations above are useful

(... like all generalisations, provided you don't expect them to apply in any particular case ...)

It strikes me that there's possibly another (controversial) generalisation which is this: men on boats tend to be bad news to be around, if they're subject to fear or insecurity.

(So are women, but they tend to express it a lot more openly.)

Men who bottle it up tend, I think, to become tyrants, unreasonable, impossible to please, withdrawn, or sometimes all the above...

A few men are changed beyond recognition the moment they assume command of anything which floats, but I'm not sure what that's about -surely it can't be fear. Or can it?

I am sure there's at least a bit of it about, unacknowledged, and I wonder if that's partly why it's not uncommon for sailors to drink rather a lot of alcohol, on arrival or return ?

If I have stumbled onto something, it possibly follows that in those instances where strategies to make a boat feel more 'homey' (eg, "let her choose the boat") are in stark conflict with the guy's (possibly unacknowledged) need to sail something which feels safe, manageable and purposeful,

it's not so much a compromise as a classic clusterf***.

denverd0n · 19-03-2013, 12:01

I don't think I believe that women, in general, don't like sailing. Maybe it's just the women that you know.

sweetsailing · 19-03-2013, 12:16

Man cave?? How about women cave? I am a women living in the snow and cold that is Minnesota right now and I can't tell you how much I am missing my boat right now. As soon as it hits 50 degrees, I can't wait to run to the boat and start in on our spring projects. Got a few hoses to change, start refinishing the exterior teak, changing out some running rigging, changing oil, etc. For me the boat is about homeiness, however I am also not hesitant at all to jump in on projects and love puttering around the boat just as much as any man. Also love sailing, yes we are at a marina, however our boat leaves the slip most everyday we are aboard. There is a feeling of peace that cannot be described when the motor is shut off and the wind fills the sails - people of both genders either understand that or they don't.